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  (#1 (permalink)) Old
Essie17 Offline
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My dad might have cancer :( - September 11th 2017, 06:22 PM

Today has been such a hard day. My dad went to the doctors a few weeks ago for something and had to go to the hospital for scans they phoned up today and he had to go to the GP surgery again and they basically said that its not what they thought it was and that it is most likely a cancer of some kind. I really dont know what to do! Just as i was getting over one problem this goes and happens and now i feel useless and have no one to talk to about things.
   
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Re: My dad might have cancer :( - September 11th 2017, 08:03 PM

Sorry to hear that your dad may have cancer. It sounds like an uncertain time for you all, and very difficult too if you have been dealing with other things going on. Even though cancer can be a scary and a rough journey, if it's caught early then it may be easier to treat.

I understand that you may not want to approach your dad and you may worry about him getting worried about you, but is there anyone you can talk to? Remember that we are here for you as well and you are more than welcome to talk about things on the forums, on HelpLINK and Live Help.


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Re: My dad might have cancer :( - September 11th 2017, 09:08 PM

I'm so sorry about that. But always remember that there are many survivors out there who got cancer, treated and are now living normally. I understand how hard this is, because my own mother got cancer and even now it seems surreal talking about it. Cancer is always made out to be the end of the world but in most cases it isn't. Like the above poster said, its better caught earlier and get treated sooner rather than later.
Don't look up stats, its the worst thing you could do, just be there for your father because if he does 100% have cancer hes going to need all your love and support and remember no matter how much your hurting, its important that he sees you strong. It's going to be hard but hopefully in a few years' time you'll look back at these days and smile at all the experience you've gained.
If you ever need to talk I'm always free! Good luck and I hope everything goes down well.


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Re: My dad might have cancer :( - September 11th 2017, 09:35 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Celyn View Post
Sorry to hear that your dad may have cancer. It sounds like an uncertain time for you all, and very difficult too if you have been dealing with other things going on. Even though cancer can be a scary and a rough journey, if it's caught early then it may be easier to treat.

I understand that you may not want to approach your dad and you may worry about him getting worried about you, but is there anyone you can talk to? Remember that we are here for you as well and you are more than welcome to talk about things on the forums, on HelpLINK and Live Help.
Yeah thats true, hopefully if tests come back positive its been detected early enough. i dont really know who to talk to about it. im not very good at talking about things
   
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Re: My dad might have cancer :( - September 12th 2017, 02:08 AM

Hello,

I'm so sorry that you are going through this right now. Lots of Hugs.

I agree with what they are saying above, I know it's hard but can you try to talk with your dad about this? I know that it's hard to do and you don't want to make him upset or anything. But he is your dad and you do love him and have that bond with him. Also it was mentioned don't look up sights, this can make you feel upset and this difficult things. If you can't talk to your dad, can you write a letter to him on how you feel and with everything that's going on? And give it to him? Can you watch a movie with him or play some board games, so you have this time with him right now. Please let us know how you are.
Lots of Hugs.
   
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Re: My dad might have cancer :( - September 12th 2017, 10:33 AM

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Originally Posted by Golfing girl View Post
Hello,

I'm so sorry that you are going through this right now. Lots of Hugs.

I agree with what they are saying above, I know it's hard but can you try to talk with your dad about this? I know that it's hard to do and you don't want to make him upset or anything. But he is your dad and you do love him and have that bond with him. Also it was mentioned don't look up sights, this can make you feel upset and this difficult things. If you can't talk to your dad, can you write a letter to him on how you feel and with everything that's going on? And give it to him? Can you watch a movie with him or play some board games, so you have this time with him right now. Please let us know how you are.
Lots of Hugs.
Thankyou. Yeah im doing okay just trying to cope at the moment really. I dont know how to bring the topic up with my dad to speak to him about it so i might wait until the time is right and then speak to him if i can
   
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Re: My dad might have cancer :( - September 12th 2017, 02:09 PM

Sorry to hear that, I understand how you feel. My relative was recently diagnosed with cancer too and it was a very difficult period of time for my family.

What your dad needs most now is support and lots & lots of love. Since everything is still preliminary, it may not be cancer but he of course, will naturally have a hard time coming to terms with the possibility of him having cancer, so I'd suggest being there for him as much as you can by spending time with him.
   
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Re: My dad might have cancer :( - September 12th 2017, 05:59 PM

I am sorry that you and your family are having to go through this. I am sure that right now things are feeling really stressful and scary. Please know that if you need anything you can pm me or reach out to us through the forums.

Firstly, I think that you should try and find someone to talk to. I know that might be hard to do but when you are dealing with something like this it can help to have people to express yourself too because dealing with a parent who is sick can be really upsetting and if you aren't able to express yourself it can take an even bigger toll.

I think that you should also do what you can to be there for your dad but you have to remember to take time to do some self care. While I am sure that your dad would love to spend a lot of time with your while you are all dealing with that I am also guessing that his main priority is going to be that you are doing okay.

Lastly, please try not to panic too much until you get the results and all that. A couple years ago my brother had some things going on and the doctor was under the impression that it was likely cancer. We were all very scared and then, with lots of testing, the doctor came back and said it was not cancer. Whatever the diagnosis ends up being be sure to lean on your family for support. I think the most important thing to remember is that you don't have to pretend to be strong while going through this. I don't think either of your parents would want you putting that type of pressure on yourself.

Best of luck and if you need anything feel free to message me.


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Re: My dad might have cancer :( - September 12th 2017, 08:33 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by ~Abibliophobe~ View Post
I am sorry that you and your family are having to go through this. I am sure that right now things are feeling really stressful and scary. Please know that if you need anything you can pm me or reach out to us through the forums.

Firstly, I think that you should try and find someone to talk to. I know that might be hard to do but when you are dealing with something like this it can help to have people to express yourself too because dealing with a parent who is sick can be really upsetting and if you aren't able to express yourself it can take an even bigger toll.

I think that you should also do what you can to be there for your dad but you have to remember to take time to do some self care. While I am sure that your dad would love to spend a lot of time with your while you are all dealing with that I am also guessing that his main priority is going to be that you are doing okay.

Lastly, please try not to panic too much until you get the results and all that. A couple years ago my brother had some things going on and the doctor was under the impression that it was likely cancer. We were all very scared and then, with lots of testing, the doctor came back and said it was not cancer. Whatever the diagnosis ends up being be sure to lean on your family for support. I think the most important thing to remember is that you don't have to pretend to be strong while going through this. I don't think either of your parents would want you putting that type of pressure on yourself.

Best of luck and if you need anything feel free to message me.
Thanks! Yeah i like talking to people about things but i never know who to talk to so most of the time i dont. i feel like i have to stay strong though because i never cry infront of anyone in my family about anything so i feel it would be weird if i started now
   
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Re: My dad might have cancer :( - September 13th 2017, 01:16 PM

It can be hard trying to find someone to talk to but some good suggestions are those that you trust and feel comfortable with, and that you feel are understanding. That could be a relative or close friend, or someone 'neutral' like a teacher or counsellor.

I definitely understand the feeling that you have to stay strong, especially when a parent is ill. But remember that you are only human and you are young as well- your feelings matter and you feel upset and want to cry it's perfectly okay to do this.

Also, I hid my feelings from my family for a long time, until things got too much and I cried. It seems weird, especially if you don't usually express your feelings, but it's very freeing to get rid of that burden, and even better when others realise how you feel and can support you.


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