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  (#1 (permalink)) Old
Nerdlord Offline
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I'm not addicted and it's not an illegal drug... - January 22nd 2009, 09:08 PM

I'm currently taking Geodon for my depression. Long story short, it has some horrible side effects, and it turns out, it's not working at all.

Now, as for the details.

I went to see a psychiatrist (Henceforth "Anna.") about my depression a few months ago. Anna told me there were two options for some antidepressants: Geodon and some other medicine I don't remember right now. Well, taking Geodon was fine, for the first week; I'd take it with dinner and go to bed around 11:30 PM. No big problem. Over the next week, I noticed that I was groggy around three hours after dinner, which we usually eat at around 5:00 PM. The week after that, I took it at dinner, and by 9:00 PM, my entire body had shut down. I couldn't think straight, I couldn't hold my head up, it was a challenge to even keep my eyes open and even breathe. So, I decided it was a minor (Yes, not being able to breathe is certainly minor...) symptom of Geodon, and decided to take it at a later time.

I experimented with times, and 8:30 PM seemed to be the best. Aside from that, everything was going great: my crush didn't seem so hopless, I no longer wanted to kill myself, I didn't even think about depression... Or so it seemed. In reality, I pushed it to the back of my mind and stopped talking about it. So, I seemed happier. My depression's always been in cycles; I get super depressed and suicidal, then it goes away and I get better, until something triggers it to come back. I really thought Geodon was making me better...

...Until this week. My depression came back, full force. Everything seems so hopeless. To top it off, Geodon's side effects were making it worse. Geodon's like an illegal narcotic: it controls me. It controls not only my mood, but it controls when I sleep, why I sleep, how long I sleep, how groggy I am in the morning, and my performance in school. It gives me insane headaches, like a little man is pounding on the inside of my head with a sledgehammer. I lost X amount of pounds, but it's such a small amount that it's not worth all of this Hell. I'd love to simply stop taking Geodon, but it's giving me Hell now taking it. What if I didn't take it? It might...kill me.

I brought it up with Anna in my most recent appointment with her. I tried telling her politely, "I don't like Geodon. You mentioned another medicine in the beginning--can I take that instead? I'd really feel more comfortable on something else..." Anna said, "Josh, Geodon is a top medicine. You seem to be doing wonderfully on it. It even helped you lose a bit of weight. We're going to keep you on it for now." She didn't listen to me at all. Every night, I wonder: what if I just stopped taking it? Would I finally be free of this Hell? But I know in reality, it's going to take a lot more to get me off of it... This week's been so horrible; we're going to tell Anna about this and hopefully, we can get her off of it.

I'm so scared... My sister told me I should try cutting one in half and only taking a part, but it's a capsule; there's no way I can cut it in half. The only thing I can think of is to tell Anna that Geodon's making me worse because of the additional fear it put in me. I'm going to get weaned off of it. I'm going to get my school counselor involved, too; I'm not leaving her office tomorrow until I get to talk to her about this. I feel like a cocaine user who wants to get off, but can't because of the side effects. There's no reason I should be scared of a legal drug perscribed to me by my psychiatrist. I'm not addicted, either... I don't think I am, at least. It's just got such a nasty side effect that I can't not take it.

Does anyone have some advice to offer, or some additional ways to help me out of this mess? Just some support would be nice, really...

Last edited by Nerdlord; January 22nd 2009 at 10:54 PM.
  (#2 (permalink)) Old
allikuja Offline
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Re: I'm not addicted and it's not an illegal drug... - January 23rd 2009, 08:20 AM

have you tried not taking it? you should probably do some online research about it. and talk to your parents about finding a new psychiatrist, one that actually cares about what you have to say (since that's pretty much their job!!). Have you ever had a psychologist, or only a psychiatrist? (The difference is that Psychiatrists have gone to Med School so that they're allowed to prescribe meds). I find some psychiatrists tend to be a little drug-happy, and don't always put in the effort to do the cognitive therapy as well. *hugs* hope things get better for you, PM if you need anything
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Olive, always Offline
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Re: I'm not addicted and it's not an illegal drug... - January 23rd 2009, 08:48 AM

Sometimes medications do have blahhh side effects. You just need to continue switching to see which one works the best for you. And that's crucial. Everybody's body chemistry is different. The psychiatrist did not handle things well and I think it's probably a good idea to get the school guidance counselor involved to get yourself some help. If the medication is just making you tired during the nighttime hours, it might not be seen as a huge issue whereas if you're falling asleep in class, that could be. Depending on where you live, there are similar medications to consider including Lexapro, Zoloft, Wellbutrin (basically other SSRIs) etc. There are other options.

Consider getting a therapist along with taking the medication. Do not just stop taking the medication abruptly, however, as some do require some "weaning off" of and could just worsen your present condition further. Continue taking the medication and look into other options (e.g. therapist and/or new medication). Don't hesitate to get a new psychiatrist to check you out.

Keep at it. PM me if you have any questions I s'pose.

  (#4 (permalink)) Old
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Re: I'm not addicted and it's not an illegal drug... - January 23rd 2009, 04:45 PM

I ended up getting my special ed teacher, Terri, involved instead of my guidance counselor. My guidance counselor, Carma, was too busy to see me both days I went in. Yes, I'm falling asleep in class sometimes. That's one of the reasons I've been failing school. (Like I said, Geodon affects my school perfomance.) I don't believe I've ever had a psychologist. I'm going to get switched from Anna to Dr. Roobin, the psychiatrist I had before. He's a nice man... He's always listened to what I had to say. Problem is, he's a town over, now...

Oh well. Things seem to be working themselves out, like I thought they would. Thanks for your support, guys. And Ergg, I'll stay on Geodon until it runs out or we get me something else.
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Re: I'm not addicted and it's not an illegal drug... - January 24th 2009, 02:00 AM

I've had geodon before (not for depression, but for anti-psychotics) and yes, it does make you very tired and groggy. I believe it also has a nice list of other side-effects, including body contortions but the grogginess is said to go away in a few weeks. I say that it is said to because I truly hated geodon simply because it made me so tired. I slept 10,12 hours, maybe more, woke up and walking was such a hard effort because of how exhausted I was. I was doing a course in the summer to get ahead and taking geodon for some of it. Happily, it wasn't for too long as I couldn't listen to the lecture due to being far too tired.

From what I've been told, since Geodon also is an anti-psychotic, it's quite strong. I believe all antipsychotics (not sure if this applies for all but think it does) do make you quite tired.

I've never taken an actual depression medication, such as Zoloft so I cant tell you how they are (simply because I don't have depression).

Go and tell the psychiatrist it's really bothering you and make that point very clear. You could threaten to take yourself off of it, throw them down the toilet, etc... and request meds that aren't also antipsychotics.
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Re: I'm not addicted and it's not an illegal drug... - January 24th 2009, 07:38 AM

What is Geodon? Like what is it used for can someone please tell me this?
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Re: I'm not addicted and it's not an illegal drug... - January 24th 2009, 06:28 PM

Geodon is an antipsychotic but can also be used as a mood stabilizer. In Canada, it's called Zeldox or Ziprasidone, in the US it's called Geodon. It tends to make you fairly tired as it's meant to stop hallucinations, unstable moods/emotions, etc... .
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Re: I'm not addicted and it's not an illegal drug... - January 27th 2009, 09:13 AM

I tried it once and I had a really bad and scary reaction. I felt completely out of my body's control, my heart was racing, and after that one dose I never took it again and left my psychiatrist.
Sometimes you have to be assertive and say what you really feel. How many more do you have left? I got a box of 40 and there was no way I was going to even try another.

Although I was only on a single 40mg pill it did me in. See if you can get a lower dose or smaller pills to see if they will less harmful. Best of luck to you.
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Re: I'm not addicted and it's not an illegal drug... - January 29th 2009, 07:53 PM

I have undiagnosed depression but we all know i have it.. um ive heard alot of shit about other antidepressionts.. what are the most comman side effects.. i heard on geodon you can get un controllible mouth movements..

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