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  (#1 (permalink)) Old
chanise Offline
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My friend - February 21st 2009, 01:26 PM

Okay Iím not sure where to put this, whether it should be in the friends and family forum or what.

Iím not sure how to start but I guess Iím very concerned about my friend.
Weíve been friends for a long time now and we have been through so much together, she is like one of my bestest friends. Sheís always had her upís and downís like everyone does. And we managed to get through them together like I promised her.

Things changed now and sheís moved away were I guess she has more freedom because she is away from her family.
And well I donít think it was the best thing for her to do. But who am I to say aye?
Anyway cut a long story short:
she usually gets depressed quite a lot and its got to the point where she needs to see a professional like I keep telling her but she wonít listen.

At first it started with O.Dís of meds just little things she could find around, that went on for a while and I kept begging her to get help before its too late.
Now she has gone on to harder drugs not meds but drugs.. and its really scary to know my friend is doing this. She has changed A lot itís like she donít care about herself and future anymore. She puts herself into extreme risks just to get these drugs and stuff and I just feel useless because I donít know what to do she wonít listen to me.
She used to hate drinking and now itís like her new best friend she rarely leaves the house and of she does its to pick up more drugs or to buy more drink.

I just donít know how to help. Our friendship is practically non exsitant to her has she told me yesterday she does not need me or anyone.
I know I must be annoying but I just really care about her has I tend to worry about people alot and I just cant bare to sit here and let her ruin her life. Okay she is 20 so she can do want she wants.
But I donít want her friendship to go I care about her so much, I hate talking to her when she is high or drunk I hate I cant stand it and its like a everyday thing now and I just donít know what to do.
Every time I try and talk to her she pushes me away, its like our friendship has almost ended.
I donít know what to do I cant just leave her she has nobody really.

What do I do? Help please..

Sorry it was kinda lengthy and probably made no sense at all!


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MadPoet Offline
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Re: My friend - February 21st 2009, 05:05 PM

Hey Chanise.
Well, tbh, there's not much you can do.. since she's already an adult. It is great that you care so much, and that she has a friend who cares. Unfortunately, it's not very easy to keep someone from doing these kind of things, if they're on their own and don't have to live with their parents anymore. If you're really concerned, though, maybe you could talk to someone close to her who could do something to help her out? Maybe go with a few other people and all talk to her at once, kind of convince her that she should get some help (kinda like on intervention ). If she knows how much people care and want her to do good in her life, maybe she'll want it herself. Other than that, I'm not to sure what I can say to help... but I really hope you and your friend feel better soon. Hang in there. xx





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Re: My friend - February 21st 2009, 07:48 PM

If talking to her doesn't help and she's really destroying her life, you need to either move on or endure it. The more people she loses in her life and the more she spirals downward, the more she may realize what she's doing to herself and others and possibly hit bottom and change her ways. There isn't much you can do besides talk to her or narc on her and i'm not sure that's the best way to get her to see the error of her ways, but either way let her know how careless she's acting and that she's gonna lose the most important things in life by acting like this.
   
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chanise Offline
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Re: My friend - February 21st 2009, 09:57 PM

Hey thanks to the both of you for your help and advice much appreciated! =)
Yeah I do understand that i.m not much help to her. I wont give up because friends don’t do that right? I called her today and let her know I was here for her when she was ready and she never seemed that fussed it’s like she has no emotion anymore. Its kinda upsetting to see and hear. I hink maybe I will try and talk to her in the morning and see how she is and maybe try one more time before getting someone else to help.
Again thanks.


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I Love Andrea.... =)
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