I'm the youngest of five siblings, and I'm also the only minor. About two weeks ago, my mom walked out on my dad for another guy. At first, of course, I was upset, and I felt betrayed and abandoned; never had I even considered going and living with my mom, who now lives about an hour away. I met with my mom last Thursday to talk to her about everything that happened, and the more we talked, the more I realized how much I needed a mom in my life, and how difficult it would be to fix our relationship if I barely ever saw her. I ended up staying with her at her new house, and after touring the area and looking at the local high school, I realized I REALLY like it over there, and I started considering moving, but I didn't rush to make any decisions because it was only my first visit. But I recently went and stayed with my mom again, and I've decided that I would really benefit from change at this moment. My dad, of course, doesn't want me to go, but he understands my need to be with my mom. I know none of you can make my decision for me, but I'd like to get some feedback on this. Do you think moving with my mom is the right decision?
It sounds like a pretty tough decision and you're right not to rush into it and choose straight away without considering everything. Perhaps you could talk to your mum and dad about spending some time up there as a sort of trial run, maybe a couple of weeks or so to try out life in that area as apposed to where you're living currently. That way you will have a better reference for comparison between the two and you may be able to make a more informed choice based on the experience you have.
Also what you could do is, if you choose not to move, is perhaps see your mum every weekend or something. You wont be missing out on school and you'll see your mum regularly enough to not have to go without her, you know?
Also, something I'm thinking about, is what about if you do go, and then you don't see your dad as often? I don't say this to alter your choices but it's just another thing to think about, if you want to keep in contact with both of them, perhaps you can discuss that with them and see what arrangements you can all come to which would allow you to spend time with both parents and still do what will benefit you the most.
I'm sorry if this wasn't much help, but I hope you come to some sort of conclusion which is best for you. Give it some thought, talk to your mum and dad, and don't make a decision until you're sure. Just remember that no matter what, you have to be happy as well.
This is a really tough situation to be in and I'm sorry to hear that you are. I think you are absolutely right to not rush into it. You have to make the decision that is right for you and works best for you.
What I say in this post isn't to try and sway your opinion one way or the other, but simply to give you somethings to think about to help you make the decision, if that makes sense.
You are 16 - not sure how it works in America, but do you have an exams coming up at the moment? As in, if you moved schools would it disturb your education? Have a think about that as it may be worth considering.
Would it be possible to live with them both? As in, maybe stay with your dad during the week (meaning you could go to the same school) and then your mum at the weekends? That way, you would get to see both your mum and dad as mother figures are important but so are father figures. I think you should chat to them both about what you are thinking as you need to look after yourself and your education.
Ultimately you need to be comfortable with what you decide as it is you that will be living your life, not one of us. Have a think through it properly, ask friends or your older siblings what they think and make the decision for you. Also remember, that whatever you decide isn't permanent. As Hollie said, you could try something on a trial basis and see how it goes. But you can always change your mind on what you decide, it isn't the final decision.
I hope that helps a bit! You can PM/VM me anytime if you need anything.
Take care of yourself,