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  (#1 (permalink)) Old
acting101 Offline
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Dorm roommates. - August 2nd 2012, 02:23 PM

I'm off to University in September, and I'll be living in residence. The only problem is I was given the only kind of room I asked not to have (I seem to have terrible luck). It'll be a traditional room style: two beds in one room. The types of rooms I wanted was either a single-bed room or a double where it would have been two separate rooms connected to each other. I've asked for a transfer, but I don't know for sure if I'll get it or not.

All I've heard are bad stories about roommates. Any friends or family I've had with double rooms hated their roommate, and it ruined their first year of school. I'm also really worried because I personally like my privacy, and I'm scared that having to be beside another person all the time is going to drive me insane.

Does anyone have some stories or tips about having roommates? Thanks.

(PS- if this is in the wrong section, feel free to move it.)

Last edited by acting101; August 2nd 2012 at 10:58 PM.
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Always * Offline
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Re: Dorm roommates. - August 2nd 2012, 02:51 PM

Well in my first year I lived in an apartment style residence and had 4 other roommates. 2 of them I was friends with, 1 I didn't mind but found her extremely annoying as a roommate cause if I left my shoes out or anything she just assumed she was allowed to use them without asking cause we had the same size of feet and she actually damaged a pair of my boots cause they put salt on the roads and sidewalks for the ice and she went and walked around in them when the roads were full of slush and I would have told her NOT to wear those cause things and to wear sneakers cause their easier to get the salt off of and slush filled with salt messes up Uggs (duh!!). And she would come in at like 2 AM with a bunch of friends drunk as hell and make a lot of noise to the point where I'd repeatedly have to tell her to shut up (literally, I went out one night and was like I'm trying to sleep please shut the fuck up already). So while I liked her as a person, as a roommate she SUCKED. AND my 4th roommate I had a majorly clash of personality with, she was uptight and stuck up, she NEVER took the garbage out and the only time "she" cleaned stuff was when her mom visited and HER MOM WAS THE ONE WHO CLEANED SHE NEVER ONCE DID ANYTHING but had the audacity to bitch about the fact that sometimes I didn't do my dishes very fast but cleaned a lot otherwise..... So yeah 2 of the 4 roommates I would have lived with happily, the other 2 not a chance in hell of wanting to live with them

My point is, that it is very hit and miss with roommates. But even if you get a really good roomate, I think that the one bedroom situation will be the real problem. They're a total stranger, what if they bring shit loads of stuff? And you won't REALLY be at home with half a bedroom. You'll have no space, privacy or comfort. Maybe that's just me though. But if you don't get a better room I'd seriously start considering living off campus, and depending on where you live it won't be any more expensive any how (if anything it might be cheaper). I mean, on the other hand, I think I am biased cause I had a terrible first year. On the other hand I think living in residence is really good because it puts you in an environment to meet a lot of people, and those are the people you could plan to live with in your second year and on in off campus housing. Even if who ever you get slammed with the worst roommate found in humanity, most residences have common rooms or floor parties or what ever for a chance to meet people, and even if you have a shitty roommate, you could always just use that as a reason to explore the city, find good study places, etc

So all that being said, you could always make sure that there is an option to opt out of residence in second semester, which I am sure there would be because a lot of people don't survive their first semester. That way if you really hate the res situation you can start apartment hunting during exams and move in January.

Feel free to PM me if you ever need to chat or have questions
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Re: Dorm roommates. - August 3rd 2012, 08:38 PM

From all the people I've talked too, they loved having a room mate. Alot of them even had to room with those they never met before; which obviously it alittle hard at first, but in the end they have became really good friends with eachother. So if you don't get this transfer, I would say still try to go into this with a positive attitude. Because if you go in thinking all negative, then the experience you will have will 100% without a doubt become negative. Go in there with a smile, being positive, and have some fun and I think that even though you aren't happy with the situation, it'll still be livable and a good experience.

Best wishes,

I hope you know that you deserve it all. The best, the most honest, the most beautiful purest love in the world. Not only to be loved by others, but to be loved by yourself. To look in the mirror and think "Yes, I'm exactly who I want to be". To speak up and be proud of yourself. To be brave and open. You deserve the nicest and most caring people to walk into your life. You deserve it all, you know. The whole world...
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Re: Dorm roommates. - August 4th 2012, 06:11 AM

well ,actually it's the first time for me to know something about a second country of its university residence problem .Living with another person

you have never seen in one room for at least one year ,without your own privacy and even your freedom ,is rather unbelieveable and certainly

uncomfortable,for you can never do whatever you like as you offen did.Now you will surely be influenced by the other person you live with,you

have to consider her feeling before doing your things.I truly know the feeling of living with person of different characters for now I am living

with other 5 in one room ,that's unbelieveable,isn't it? and I made it,so it's a challeng for you to improve your social ability to cope with

different people,take it easy and you will overcome this,and the most important :Enjoy your university life and do as you have said "look on the

bright side of life!(I feel sorry if I made any mistakes here for I am a english learner )

If life seems jolly rotten,
you've forgotten.
And that's tolaugh andsmile and dance and sing.
Always look on the bright side of life

Last edited by jesson; August 4th 2012 at 06:17 AM.
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Re: Dorm roommates. - August 4th 2012, 04:55 PM

Just because other people have had bad experiences doesn't meant that you will, I would at least try it before trying to get transfered out (which may not be possible for a while if ever). Most people I talked to stayed close to their roommates for years after college. Living with a stranger can be tricky, but they usually try to match major charateristics so you won't butt heads too much. You'll still have your independence and be able to do pretty much whatever within reason, but there will need to be compromises. Try to go into this with an open mind, at least for the sake of the other person because not doing so will make it even worse; especially if you make it obvious that you didn't want a roommate because you could be stuck with one for awhile.

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Re: Dorm roommates. - August 4th 2012, 05:52 PM

See, I think it depends, for example, of the 2 roommates I like I don't talk to either of them, the one I will see maybe once a semester for a lunch. And the other girl I wouldn't talk to her even if she was sitting beside me cause I have nothing to say to her. And the other girl I will say hi to, but we don't hang out cause our lifestyles are totally different. I think it was a good experience for me to live in residence, but my current living situation where I only live with people I CHOOSE to live with is a lot more preferable. I did the whole stranger thing, and I'm glad i did it but I will never ever do it ever again. So yeah, it's not a standard, some people hate res, some people loved it, some people are like me and are indifferent (it happened, it's over). And some people will love their roommates, some will hate them and everything in between.

I think it's hard to say that it'll rock or suck for everyone, everyone has a giant range of experiences. Hope that helps. You should hope to get your choice of room (albeit last minute), even still, give it a shot, if you hate it you can back out in second semester and find an actual apartment.

Feel free to PM me if you ever need to chat or have questions
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Re: Dorm roommates. - August 10th 2012, 01:52 AM

I lucked out and managed to get a single room my entire time in undergrad (random drawing my first year, got to pick my second year, and moved off-campus for my last two years). During my freshman year, we were randomly assigned rooms and roommates. There were four singles and two triples. In one triple, all three girls got along well (there was a bit of drama here and there, but that's to be expected for people like them). In the other triple, two girls got along well, but the third was a mess, both physically and emotionally. Many complaints were filed with the university, and after two months, the university finally took one of the complaints seriously and had the girl transferred. After that, the two girls did well enough together.

Look, living with ANYONE can be difficult, even if they're your best friend or romantic partner. I'm a lot like you: I want my privacy! I don't want to be around someone 24/7. I want to go into MY room and relax without having to worry about what my roommate is doing. That being said, I know a lot of people who are like me, and made it work. The key is to be friendly at first, even if you are nervous. If you come across as the strange, silent type right off the bat, it's only going to get worse. If your roommate happens to be like that, don't give up on being friendly after one week! Keep making the effort for a month or two, and if they still don't open up... well, at least you won't have to worry about them being disruptive while you're trying to study. =P

There are many, MANY ways to deal with difficult roommates (COMMUNICATION and RULES), and when you have a roommate who doesn't want to cooperate, there are many, MANY ways to cope. I knew someone who had a horrible roommate, so she ended up spending a great deal of her time at friends' dorms. After a while, she got along so well with them that they agreed to let her move in! Another person I knew just wore headphones all the time (so she didn't have to listen to her roommate's incessant chattering) and joined a kickboxing class (to let off some steam when the dishes weren't washed for the millionth time).

If you have the option to transfer, then go ahead and try to transfer. Prepare for the possibility that you're going to share a room with someone, though, and approach the situation with optimism and a willingness to be the perfect roommate. If you put forth a ton of effort right off the bat, your roommate, even if they are a complete stranger, will most likely want to return the favor (at least initially). Roommates don't always become friends, but you can still be respectful toward one another and have a pleasant living arrangement, if you're both willing to put in the effort. =)

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Re: Dorm roommates. - August 12th 2012, 06:46 AM

One thing is obvious, if you're a big fan of privacy, you won't really like the fact that you're gonna be sharing the room with someone else. Everybody prefers single or connected rooms, it's just that not everybody gets them. You may have to live with this probably until next year.

However, having a roommate can also be the biggest blessing too. This is where many people make their college friends and accomplices. If you get a chill roommate, you'll definitely be enjoying your school year, you just gotta give your roommate a chance!

Carpe Diem: Seize the Day/Moment. -Horace

Veni, Vidi, Vici: I came, I saw, I conquered -Julius Caesar
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