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Friends and Family Everyone has disagreements, even best friends and family. If you need advice about a relationship, ask us here.

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Don't know why I feel like this - September 6th 2012, 04:28 PM

I just wanted to get this off of my chest cos it's been playing on my mind.

Recently I've been starting to think that I can't trust one of my best friends. I don't know why I think this because she hasn't done anything wrong. I just feel as though I can't tell her personal stuff anymore and I don't think of her as such as good friend. I can't make sense of it because she hasn't done anything. We were talking about taking our relationship further about a month ago because I really liked her and she said she liked me but she didn't want to risk our friendship. We had one night together where we did a couple of sexual things but we didn't actually have sex.

I feel as though this is nothing to do with that because I don't like her like that anymore and I've never felt like this to anyone else. The only thing I can think of is my paranoia. I get incredibly paranoid over the smallest of things and I spend hours fretting. I'm worried because it's been getting worse recently. I keep overreacting to everything and thinking that everything is going to take a turn for the worse. I've tried to stop myself from being paranoid but it hasn't worked. I feel almost as though my paranoia is getting in the way of my friendship with her. I really don't know what to do because I constantly feel like I don't want to be around her and that I can't trust her. I keep telling myself that I can but I just don't believe myself when I say it.

I can't seem to figure anything out, which worries me cos I can usually sort out my problems easily. Normally I just think over them and essentially have a conversation with myself which goes over everything I'm thinking but that just isn't working.

I don't know what to think about this, if you can help then please do, this is really stressing me out


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Re: Don't know why I feel like this - September 6th 2012, 11:51 PM

Well, in a way, your distrust of your friend makes sense. While she may not have done anything wrong, you DID reveal some very personal information (that you liked her), AND you engaged in some sexual activities (which can be very intimate in nature). In a way, she's seen a new side of you, one that is rarely seen by others (and she may even be the first person you've had any kind of sexual experience with). She now holds a potentially very powerful card in her hand, and whether you realize it or not, knowing she has that power may be making you uneasy. Chances are she won't use it against you, but it may take a while for your brain to realize that and stop assuming the worst will happen.






   
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