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Friends and Family Everyone has disagreements, even best friends and family. If you need advice about a relationship, ask us here.

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Exclamation Overly narcissistic friend - October 27th 2012, 09:01 PM

I have this friend. He is a relatively new friend but he's a good guy. Funny and everything. But I really think he's too self-absorbed and self-obsessed. I mean, being conceited is okay to an extent but only to a certain extent. Not beyond that. He's too narcissistic. And his sarcasm and his jokes keep coming. All of us take it because we know he's only kidding but sometimes its offensive. I dont necessarily want to get back at him because I dont want an argument or a fight but something to make him reduce it! Help?


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Re: Overly narcissistic friend - October 27th 2012, 10:03 PM

You don't have to "get back" at your friend - instead, you can point out a few examples of how he can be offensive at times. Since this behavior seems to be affecting a few people, you could get together as a group and carefully plan out how you'll address this problem with him. You don't want to gang up and starting attacking him, so come up with a few examples together, and stick with just those examples (vs. listing examples for half an hour and making your friend feel bad). Kindly bring these examples up, and make it clear that you like your friend, but you'd prefer it if these behaviors stopped. Avoid labeling HIM as "narcissistic"; instead, you can describe his BEHAVIORS as "off-putting." A true narcissist is secretly very insecure under all the arrogant behavior, so you want to ensure he doesn't "shut down" or ignore what you guys are saying out of hurt feelings. Good luck! =)






   
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