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Friends and Family Everyone has disagreements, even best friends and family. If you need advice about a relationship, ask us here.

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stateofserenity Offline
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Stuck - November 5th 2013, 02:30 PM

Hey everyone.

All of last week my friends were were whispering about me right in front of my face. They said they won't ever tell me why in a mean way. On friday, they came out and said that i was mean and a bitch. One of the guys is also being mean to one of my other friends. He said to her: "You don't deserve stuff like that because you're a bitch.". He calls her a whore too.

I'm really fed up with them but they're my only friends. I don't even want to make-up with them. The problem is I don't have anywhere else to go. I'd just be a friendless loser. Any advice?



❣"You think you want to die but in reality you just want to be saved."❣



   
  (#2 (permalink)) Old
SouthernBelle. Offline
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Re: Stuck - November 5th 2013, 07:06 PM

"Friendless loser" is better than "abused victim".

Besides, if they're already being this rude, then you really don't have friends, anyway, because they're not friends.


Anna's Personal Keys to Happiness
1. Do what you want within the bounds of reason, whenever you want to, and regret nothing. 2. If you have an opinion, don't beat around the bush, or there isn't a point in saying it. 3. Don't keep the company of anyone who won't like you and will try to change you.



   
  (#3 (permalink)) Old
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Re: Stuck - November 5th 2013, 07:38 PM

I have to agree with Anna on this one.

Being alone, is a much better option than constantly dealing with verbal and emotional abuse. You (nor anyone) deserves that kind thing from their 'friends'. I think it's best to find a new group of friends. Get involved at school, join clubs, sports, groups, or even volunteer somewhere. Making friends is a trial and error process. You will make some, and you will lose some. But in the end, once you get a real group of friends, you'll be glad you put in all the time and effort into this process.

Keep your head up, and find some new and healthy friendships!


Best wishes,
Chris


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I hope you know that you deserve it all. The best, the most honest, the most beautiful purest love in the world. Not only to be loved by others, but to be loved by yourself. To look in the mirror and think "Yes, I'm exactly who I want to be". To speak up and be proud of yourself. To be brave and open. You deserve the nicest and most caring people to walk into your life. You deserve it all, you know. The whole world...
   
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Re: Stuck - November 5th 2013, 07:51 PM

Ive been in kind of the same situation cause sometimes my friends are mean to me but most of the time they are joking,but they have never said anything that mean! wow I know it must be hard to try and make new friends but just try its better to have new friends or be alone for a bit than have freinds that are being mean to you. I say do whatever makes you happy plus if you feel it is getting worse tell someone!
   
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Re: Stuck - November 6th 2013, 01:04 AM

Thanks for the replies. The thing is, they've never acted like this before. It's just been recently but it's outrageous. I'm in the middle of making new friends. I just don't know when the point will be when I can just decide to sit with them at lunch and stuff. My school is pretty much set up in cliques like that :/.



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Re: Stuck - November 6th 2013, 02:04 AM

Just ask! Your new friends won't mind, especially if you explain the situation to them. Or better yet, don't tell them the problem, 'cause that might start something, lol. But just ask. They won't mind.


Anna's Personal Keys to Happiness
1. Do what you want within the bounds of reason, whenever you want to, and regret nothing. 2. If you have an opinion, don't beat around the bush, or there isn't a point in saying it. 3. Don't keep the company of anyone who won't like you and will try to change you.



   
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Re: Stuck - November 6th 2013, 02:38 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by SouthernBelle. View Post
Just ask! Your new friends won't mind, especially if you explain the situation to them. Or better yet, don't tell them the problem, 'cause that might start something, lol. But just ask. They won't mind.
You're right. I tend to make big deals out of nothing. Everything just feels so weird because I've been friends with them for so long.



❣"You think you want to die but in reality you just want to be saved."❣



   
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Re: Stuck - November 6th 2013, 03:04 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by stateofserenity View Post
You're right. I tend to make big deals out of nothing. Everything just feels so weird because I've been friends with them for so long.
Yeah, sometimes things like this are pretty tough to deal with at first. They've been your friends for ages, and making new ones is like stepping from a leaky canoe into a non-leaky one: If the second canoe starts moving while you've got your foot in the first, you're gonna do a split, and that's not gonna be fun. In other words... If you step out of one friendship into another one, you're liable to get hurt. But if you stay in this friendship/canoe, you're already sinking, and then you'll drown. And that won't be fun.

I really should learn not to advise people with figurative language.


Anna's Personal Keys to Happiness
1. Do what you want within the bounds of reason, whenever you want to, and regret nothing. 2. If you have an opinion, don't beat around the bush, or there isn't a point in saying it. 3. Don't keep the company of anyone who won't like you and will try to change you.



   
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Re: Stuck - November 6th 2013, 06:07 AM

I was literally in this same exact situation. One day, my "friends" started being rude to me for no reason. They had been my friends for 5+ years. I couldn't just stop talking to them. BUT I started to realize that this isn't how friends are supposed to act. So I decided to meet new friends. The change is very different and it is tough but it pays off. I hope it gets better for you!
   
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Re: Stuck - November 6th 2013, 11:23 AM

No Anna, that was really helpful!



❣"You think you want to die but in reality you just want to be saved."❣



   
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Re: Stuck - November 6th 2013, 01:38 PM

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Originally Posted by stateofserenity View Post
No Anna, that was really helpful!


I can't believe someone actually understood my babbling, lol.

Anyway, I bid you good luck in your new-friend-making and welcome to the site! So far as I can tell, you're pretty friendly, so I don't think you'd have a problem at all with making and keeping new friends.


Anna's Personal Keys to Happiness
1. Do what you want within the bounds of reason, whenever you want to, and regret nothing. 2. If you have an opinion, don't beat around the bush, or there isn't a point in saying it. 3. Don't keep the company of anyone who won't like you and will try to change you.



   
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