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Friends and Family Everyone has disagreements, even best friends and family. If you need advice about a relationship, ask us here.

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Stuckinhell Offline
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Under age- Left out - April 28th 2009, 08:28 AM

So all my friends are 18, and i'm not. And to be honest, it's starting to really bother me, as i'm finding i rarely get to see them. Evenings they go clubing/bars/pubs. I cant go. So I end up staying on my own. Even when they invite me, and say they'll do something else like cinema/meal whatever, i feel really bad, as if there only doing it because they have to, so i've ended up making excuses.

My boyfriends 18, and he normally doesnt go with them, but spends evenings with me. But then i feel really bad. He SAYS he doesnt like bars and things, but I KNOW he's only doing it for me. I just feel really stupid.

I know this sounds like such a small thing, but it's really bothering me. I hardly go out the house anymore except for work/college. I'm depressed anyway, and this is making things much worse.


   
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Re: Under age- Left out - April 28th 2009, 11:17 AM

you know, there are many kinds of people in this world, and actually, your boyfriend might be the type who doesnt really drink and all that

and just so you know, all things put behind,

you got a pretty good boyfriend so it's a really good thing.

and you know, going out might help you de-stress because when you go out, you get to let loose. just remember that everyone else is always going to be there to help you.

especially US .


Those who have went through more pain than everyone else, and want to protect anyone and everyone they know and care for from that pain, are stronger than everyone.

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Re: Under age- Left out - April 28th 2009, 11:41 AM

But the problem is...I CANT go out with them. Everywhere they go is ID only. Even when there not drinking, they'll socialise in a bar/club...not drinking but still ID only


   
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Re: Under age- Left out - April 28th 2009, 12:03 PM

Hi Maia,

It's horrible when you feel like you can't spend time with your friends in the places they're most likely to go to, but maybe when they suggest going to other places, it's because it's more important to them to see you and spend time with you than to go to a particular place. You aren't forcing them to go anywhere, they're offering, because the friendship is important to them. If you're worried, maybe you could suggest going out somewhere to them - if you suggest going somewhere, you know they aren't changing where they'd like to go so that you can go too, because it was your idea? Although it will help if you can go out when they aren't going to pubs or clubs too, because otherwise you might feel like you're always having to arrange seeing them and that's not ideal either!

I know it's frustrating for the moment, but remember that even if you don't feel able to go out with them yet, you'll reach 18 too and then you'll be able to go out with them without worrying about this particular issue.

Lils
   
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Re: Under age- Left out - April 28th 2009, 01:42 PM

what lils said

remember that you have a caring boyfriend who cares for you a lot, and that knowledge is there to stay. either that, or maybe incase you feel like you wanna rest at home, just get a good book that you can indulge in, or something.

*passes you some chocolate * because i think you'd like some !


Those who have went through more pain than everyone else, and want to protect anyone and everyone they know and care for from that pain, are stronger than everyone.

we come, we help, we stick and never leave. pm me anytimeee!

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Gaia Offline
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Re: Under age- Left out - April 28th 2009, 04:01 PM

i Have to say, I've been in your shoes, and with friends who are underage, and it never mattered to me where we went out, as long as we all went out.
It's the people that make the night, not the place. They are your friends, and they want to hang out with you, so take advantage of it when they suggest somewhere you don't need ID.
Don't feel stupid, you can't help when you were born


"Life is pain, anybody that says different is selling something" ~ Fezzik's Mother, The Princess Bride. ♥

"To die, would be an awfully big adventure."~ Peter Pan

"Do not believe in anything simply because you have heard it.
Do not believe in anything simply because it is spoken and rumoured by many.
Do not believe in anything simply because it is found written in your religious books.
Do not believe in anything merely on the authority of your teachers and elders.
Do not believe in traditions because they have been handed down for many generations.
But after observation and analysis, when you find that anything agrees with reason and is conducive to the good and benefit of one and all, then accept it and live up to it."

~ The Buddha

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Re: Under age- Left out - April 28th 2009, 04:05 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by darrenboy! View Post


*passes you some chocolate * because i think you'd like some !
Thanks you

Thanks for the advice people. I guess i've always been someone thats really concerned about everyone else doing what they want.


   
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