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Friends and Family Everyone has disagreements, even best friends and family. If you need advice about a relationship, ask us here.

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Question Running away - March 25th 2014, 02:32 AM

I want to runaway. My ma doesn't want to raise a gay kid. She has told me that. I dont believe in "God" and she's Christian. I am adopted. I was adopted when i was 11.
   
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Re: Running away - March 25th 2014, 02:39 AM

Running away is neverrrr the answer. Unfortunately there are a lot of cases where people are un-accepting.... she may come to terms with it, and unfortunately she may not. but there are millions of people just like you. And we are a community that is here for you <3 you are beautiful in every way. And being aware that you are gay is the first step on your path to your discovery.
   
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Re: Running away - March 25th 2014, 02:43 AM

I know that i am not the only person, but right now my life is pretty f***ed up right now. I don't know what else I can do. I am in a dark place, my life i falling a part in pieces. and it hurts. bad
   
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Re: Running away - March 25th 2014, 07:40 AM

Do you have any relatives that live close? I'm just worried and concerned about you. At least if you are gonna run away, go stay with someone in the family.


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Re: Running away - March 25th 2014, 04:22 PM

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Do you have any relatives that live close? I'm just worried and concerned about you. At least if you are gonna run away, go stay with someone in the family.
I do not... Sadly
   
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Re: Running away - March 25th 2014, 05:32 PM

Well, I'm not gona say, don't do it. It's your decision and in some situations it is the only way, but don't just grab your stuff and leave. Make a plan first. Where will you go? How are you chances to find a place to stay there? I don't know how old you are, but you need to eat, so you will need at least some sort of a job...
Always keep in mind, what running away also means. You will have to work for yourself, find yourself a job, a home, something to eat, friends... there are so many things you have to keep in mind...
Maybe you have a friend who can let you stay at his place for a few days first? Or maybe some other place you can stay at? You don't necessarily need to run away, but maybe you can get some distance between your home and you in an other way?

Well what I'm trying to say, if you want to run away, do it, it's you decision, but know what you are doing. What you are going through right now may seem horrible, but you won't be of any better if you end up somewhere in the street, homeless, hungry and alone.
Whatever you do, please be carefull


It's ok to give in to an urge or make a mistake. You are only human and we all have our flaws. We all have our weak moments and we all make mistakes. Thats what makes us human.
Thats what makes us unique and beautiful

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Re: Running away - March 25th 2014, 08:07 PM

I dont think it is a wise decison to run away.I am pretty sure soon she will accept you.You just need to face it.As they say "Time heals wounds".

Stay Strong
   
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Re: Running away - March 25th 2014, 08:55 PM

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Originally Posted by Etari View Post
Well, I'm not gona say, don't do it. It's your decision and in some situations it is the only way, but don't just grab your stuff and leave. Make a plan first. Where will you go? How are you chances to find a place to stay there? I don't know how old you are, but you need to eat, so you will need at least some sort of a job...
Always keep in mind, what running away also means. You will have to work for yourself, find yourself a job, a home, something to eat, friends... there are so many things you have to keep in mind...
Maybe you have a friend who can let you stay at his place for a few days first? Or maybe some other place you can stay at? You don't necessarily need to run away, but maybe you can get some distance between your home and you in an other way?

Well what I'm trying to say, if you want to run away, do it, it's you decision, but know what you are doing. What you are going through right now may seem horrible, but you won't be of any better if you end up somewhere in the street, homeless, hungry and alone.
Whatever you do, please be carefull
I have a plan. and HA friends.. I do not have any thing like that... I am a loner. And i am 14.
   
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Re: Running away - March 25th 2014, 09:09 PM

Hi there!

I agree with the others, running away isn't a good idea. It's hard to live out on your own. You're only 14, so a job would be hard to get. I'm really sorry that your parents aren't accepting of who you are. That must be really hard to deal with.

If your home situation is really bothering you, I think you should speak up about it. Do you have a guidance counselor at school? What about a favorite teacher or a coach? You could talk to a trusted adult about what's happening at home and ask for resources to make it better. Often times, this includes talking with the parents, counseling, or getting you out of the house depending on the severity of it. I really wish you the best. And anyways, you're getting closer to being an adult, so you can look forward to moving out when you're of age. I hope this helped a little!


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Re: Running away - March 25th 2014, 09:27 PM

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Hi there!

I agree with the others, running away isn't a good idea. It's hard to live out on your own. You're only 14, so a job would be hard to get. I'm really sorry that your parents aren't accepting of who you are. That must be really hard to deal with.

If your home situation is really bothering you, I think you should speak up about it. Do you have a guidance counselor at school? What about a favorite teacher or a coach? You could talk to a trusted adult about what's happening at home and ask for resources to make it better. Often times, this includes talking with the parents, counseling, or getting you out of the house depending on the severity of it. I really wish you the best. And anyways, you're getting closer to being an adult, so you can look forward to moving out when you're of age. I hope this helped a little!
I am homeschool. I don't trust anyone. and i was planning working and being payed under the table
   
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Re: Running away - March 25th 2014, 10:03 PM

While I can't tell you not to run away, I can put a few things into perspective for you. Often people of all ages run away from home for whatever reason, in your case you want to run away from your home because you're unhappy in it, this is quite a common theme for a lot of people where they feel they're so unhappy in their home that they feel the best thing to do is to run away, only, a lot of people don't actually think beyond the fact of 'running away from home' and 'going somewhere else'.

Running away from home and actually surviving is something so many people forget about. They're so caught up in the act and desire of wanting to run away from home they don't think about 3 important factors. 1. Clean drinking water. 2. Suitable food. 3. Warmth.

You're underage and have no real income of your own. How will you pay for food? How will you get clean drinking water? Where will you stay to keep warm? Running away and staying away is a lot harder than you think.

You'll be without a lot of things you may not realise you take for granted. A comfy warm bed. A roof over your head. Free food on the table. Clean, purified drinking water. The ability to have medical checks and access to medicines for when you get infections, colds, flus and emergency medical services. When you run away, you forfeit all of these things. Comfy warm beds no longer exist, only hard concrete of the ground, or soil and grass. Decent quality shelter along with a warm bed comes at a cost, you need money to pay for it, anything else requires you to scavenge and may not always be weather-proof. Food is no longer free, you have to pay for it. Clean drinking water must either be bought, collected and purified from a safe source or you have to find a way to access clean water which is safe to drink another way and as for anything medical, you'll no longer be able to access healthcare facilities unless you're from a country such as the UK which can provide it for free, and even then you risk being taken back to the home you already chose to run away from.

The single most important thing of all is, there are a lot of dangerous people in the world. A lot of those people can be stronger than you, bigger than you and can come in groups.

I'm sorry if I sound a little blunt but unfortunately this is the only way I can put this across to you to help you to see things from a different perspective other than wanting to run away from your home because of home troubles. I get you're struggling with your home right now but the best thing you can do is tell an official. If you have access to support workers or child security agencies then I strongly suggest you contact one of them and explain your situation and go from there.


Life is for living, not for losing.
   
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Re: Running away - March 26th 2014, 10:54 PM

Ok, you want to run away, great. But no matter how angry your mom is about your sexuality and no matter how much it sucks, you are still a minor - if you run away she can call the police, report you as a missing person and they will find you and bring you back. You'd be taking a massive risk by running away unnecessarily.

If things are going so badly that it's reached this point I think you need to consider alternatives. Why not start by calling child protective services and letting them know what is going on, that the situation is bad enough you want to run away, and ask them for help. They can help mediate between you and your mom and help change the situation to be more positive. If CPS doesn't have any affect let's talk about running away then, but I would like to hear you talking to CPS first

PS. In your other post you actually said you are homeless since your mom kicked you out for being pregnant but you lost the baby and then you started talking about your sexuality being another issue. I'm not trying imply that you are lying I just think that I could use some clarification about what exactly is going on.




Feel free to PM me if you ever need to chat or have questions
   
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Re: Running away - March 27th 2014, 01:51 AM

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Originally Posted by ~Wallflower~ View Post
Ok, you want to run away, great. But no matter how angry your mom is about your sexuality and no matter how much it sucks, you are still a minor - if you run away she can call the police, report you as a missing person and they will find you and bring you back. You'd be taking a massive risk by running away unnecessarily.

If things are going so badly that it's reached this point I think you need to consider alternatives. Why not start by calling child protective services and letting them know what is going on, that the situation is bad enough you want to run away, and ask them for help. They can help mediate between you and your mom and help change the situation to be more positive. If CPS doesn't have any affect let's talk about running away then, but I would like to hear you talking to CPS first

PS. In your other post you actually said you are homeless since your mom kicked you out for being pregnant but you lost the baby and then you started talking about your sexuality being another issue. I'm not trying imply that you are lying I just think that I could use some clarification about what exactly is going on.
I am sorry. I am not lying I my sister and I share this account and she ran away a few weeks ago. My sister and i use this as a way to communicate with out our parents finding out. We are really close. I find out things from her posts and she finds out how things are here and i want to runaway. She is straight I am gay. She is 2 years older. Sorry for the confusion. Do you understand?
   
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Re: Running away - March 29th 2014, 01:20 AM

Yep, I get it.




Feel free to PM me if you ever need to chat or have questions
   
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