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Friends and Family Everyone has disagreements, even best friends and family. If you need advice about a relationship, ask us here.

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Leighd1144 Offline
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I think that's OVER. - July 27th 2014, 11:11 PM

This is also kind of a rant but I am also asking for advice. Basically, I'm done with my mother. Now this isn't one of those 'mom won't give me fifty dollars to blow on shit at the mall' things. I have done so much for my mother- I drain MY funds to put gas in HER car so she can get a job and get me and my siblings back, and pay HER phone bill so she can talk to her man, and even buy her a birthday gift. And what does she do? Leaves us AGAIN. Just drops us. Like 'LOL I know the whole thing where your my kids and all, but I think I'll go party! And quit my job. Screw being there for my kids' She has done so much to hurt us- been in the ICU 2x now for drug ODs, both times docs didn't think she'd make it. I came and stayed overnight in the waiting room so I could MAYBE see her in the morning and just look at her. Know how comfortable that was? Either way, I have 0 interest in reconciling this time. She ditched us again. I can't do this heartbreak thing again. How do I say this to my therapist and grandparents?
   
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Re: I think that's OVER. - July 28th 2014, 12:30 AM

I think you're wise to not reconcile. Your mom sounds like no good. I'm really sorry you're going through this. Your mom is supposed to be there for YOU.

Do you therapist and grandparents want you to reconcile? I think you should tell them no, and be firm about it. If she's left you before, and this isn't the first time, then I don't see why you need to keep being the one getting hurt.

I think you do need to talk about it with your therapist though. I can only imagine how you must be feeling right now.


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Re: I think that's OVER. - July 28th 2014, 04:32 AM

My grandparents say she's not allowed back but to get her things (which I'm bagging up tomorrow morning), and at that point I told them I wasn't making up with her. They were like 'whatever yo'. She really is no good, if dying twice and losing your kids 3 times won't change you, nothing will. But I do plan on telling my therapist (who thanks to her is very much required). I just don't know how my brother and sister (both younger) will look at me after this. They're too young to get it (4 and 10). I hope they don't see me as bad, but I refuse to put up with her anymore.
   
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Re: I think that's OVER. - July 28th 2014, 05:10 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Leighd1144 View Post
My grandparents say she's not allowed back but to get her things (which I'm bagging up tomorrow morning), and at that point I told them I wasn't making up with her. They were like 'whatever yo'. She really is no good, if dying twice and losing your kids 3 times won't change you, nothing will. But I do plan on telling my therapist (who thanks to her is very much required). I just don't know how my brother and sister (both younger) will look at me after this. They're too young to get it (4 and 10). I hope they don't see me as bad, but I refuse to put up with her anymore.
Even if they did, I think they'd understand one day.

I'm glad that your therapist and grandparents are understanding, and I think it's really good that you're done. You don't have to live your life on anyone else's terms, especially someone like that.


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Thumbs up Re: I think that's OVER. - July 28th 2014, 01:57 PM

[quote=Stella Lunaris;1125615]Even if they did, I think they'd understand one day.

I'm glad that your therapist and grandparents are understanding, and I think it's really good that you're done. You don't have to live your life on anyone else's terms, especially someone like that.
[/QU Thank you, it's nice to know someone agrees with me who isn't too terribly biased. I have therapy today and am about to go bag her things up after I post. Thank you love (don't mind that, I call everyone love, I'm from 'the south'. USA )
   
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Re: I think that's OVER. - July 28th 2014, 04:52 PM

Hey there,
if being in the hospital and ditching your kids and seeing them suffer wont change her than nothing will.
you are not wrong in hating her the way you do and should explain to your grandparents and therapist that you have given her enough chances and that all of you deserve a better life than this.
if you need someone to talk to, you can contact me
best of luck
   
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