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Friends and Family Everyone has disagreements, even best friends and family. If you need advice about a relationship, ask us here.

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ac135 Offline
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Name: Maddy
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Unhappy How to feel towards me brother... - August 11th 2014, 04:52 AM

I don't even know where to begin. My family isn't the best, but one of the biggest problems is my brother. He's heading off to college in a bit, and literally told my dad "I can't wait to get out of here."

He used to abuse me and my siblings when we were kids, just beat us up when we didn't do what he wanted. I am a Catholic, as is my family, but for almost two years now he's changed, hanging out with non-catholics and stuff. I don't have anything against that, but he's totally different now, one of those fake people who have millions of half-hearted friends, never get angry around anyone but their family. I'm literally disgusted to be around him, for multiple reasons. He's hurt all of us in different ways.

But he's my brother, so how am I supposed to feel towards him? I'm glad to be a Catholic, and Jesus says to love our enemies, but lately I just can't feel any love for him. Does anyone know how I should behave towards him? Should I just act like nothing's going on if he talks to me? Should I be abrupt so he knows that I don't like what he's doing? Although he's kinda crazy so I don't think that would work... I don't know. Help please!

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Re: How to feel towards me brother... - August 11th 2014, 05:17 AM

Hey Maddy,

I think that perhaps the best way to deal with this is to talk to him about how you're feeling about all this, though with what you said about his behavior towards you guys, I'm not sure that he would be willing to listen. So I guess the next best thing would be to talk to your closest family member. You may feel the same way as them and you can help each other out.

And as for when he speaks to you, I think that you should just be nice. Just treat him the way you would like him to treat you. If he says something mean or horrible, just excuse yourself and walk away. There's no point in getting in a fight with him.

These are just my views on your situation so I hope they helped :/

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Re: How to feel towards me brother... - August 11th 2014, 07:51 PM

Hello Maddy,

Do you know if you're brother is stressed out about anything in his life? Sometimes we tend to act out differently if something is going on with us. A lot of people hang with a variety of different people aside from ones own beliefs and religions. He might want to have another group of friends than the same group he has been around for awhile.

It's great that your brother is going away for schooling and that you won't have to deal with him much longer if he is causing some issues in the home and for yourself. Have you talked to him as to why he is acting differently and why he treats you badly? Usually when someone has something going on for them they tend to take it out on others. Would you feel comfortable asking what is going on or maybe talk with your parents about your concerns and feelings?

If nothing changes you can look forward to not having your brother around where he will be away for schooling.

Take Care.


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