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Friends and Family Everyone has disagreements, even best friends and family. If you need advice about a relationship, ask us here.

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Chloe.exe Offline
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Exclamation urgent help/advice needed! - August 20th 2014, 09:48 PM

Ok. So i have perviously posted about my brothers behavior and got good advice from it.

But hes gone too far this time.

My brother had my whole home town and beyoned out searching for him and his friend worried they where kidnapped. They where reported missing to the police and we searched 6 hours untill we finally found them building a den down by our local shop. My brother disobeyed mine and my mums orders which was 1) dont go by the shops and 2) dont go out without your phone. My mum is really angry and cant deal with him. The last time he was in trouble my dad said "next time im ringing social services" and now my dad doesnt seem to hesitate calling them to take my troubled brother away

Im really worried he may be taken away becuase i do love my brother and even though i try to help he pushes me away and ignores everyone!

Please help me! Xx
   
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Re: urgent help/advice needed! - August 20th 2014, 11:04 PM

Hello Chloe,

Is there another way where your brother wont be taken away but receive the help and support he does need? I ask this because there's services out there that can help him and the family. Some cities or towns offer group homes where he can go to, to receive some treatment and help your brother. There is also services where he can stay at home where he goes to regular counseling/therapy appointments and someone coming in to check up on him. Those are some options that could work. I understand you don't want your brother to be taken away however, being taken away isn't the only option. You care and love your brother so could you express this with your parents or to the Social Worker when they do come?

Another thing you can try is talking to your brother say that dad wants to call Social Services and you don't want him to go, this may give him something to think about and that he knows you don't want him to leave the house cause you love and care about him.

The best thing you can do is express how you are feeling and tell them what you don't want to happen. Do you know why you don't want your brother to be taken away? This can help explain how you feel when you express this with your parents. You don't need to express your concern with your parents but maybe with the Social Worker?

Please take care.


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Re: urgent help/advice needed! - August 21st 2014, 09:19 PM

Thanks for the advice! Its difficult to get help for my brother as we live in a small town in basically the middle of no where. It takes a long time to get anywhere but we have been taking him to a larger town thats about an hour away where he is getting help. Im just worried as i dont think its working. Im tge closest family member to my brother and when i talk to him he seems to hate where he is but doesnt want to leave. Getting help is rather difficult also as everything goes in one ear and out the next. When we where younger there was a woman who would come and talk to us about any problems we had or issues with the family but when that organisation closed down we where stuck.

I guess i dont want him to go anywhere becuase hes my brother and i would miss him if he went, yet it would be better for everyone else. Im not really sure.

If i try expressing my feelings to my parents they get shoved out of the way and told its none of my buisness.
   
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Re: urgent help/advice needed! - August 22nd 2014, 02:14 AM

Hey Chloe,

This all really depends on your brother now. If your parents aren't willing to listen to you and say that it's none of your business, then your only option is to find a way to get through to your brother. Like the user above mentioned, you could tell your brother that your dad is thinking about calling Social Services and that you don't want him to leave.

Feel free to message me if you would like to talk!

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Re: urgent help/advice needed! - August 22nd 2014, 09:10 AM

Hey there,

Just because your dad calls social services doesn't necessarily mean that they will take your brother away. They might come in and do an interview with the family and see what resources there are within your community(or surrounding communities) and go from there. However, they might not want to take him away from his family when they can provide other services to you guys. They might suggest counseling for your brother as well as family counseling. I think you will just have to wait and see what happens.

Also, do you think you could try talking to your brother and let him know that your dad is thinking of calling social services and you are worried about him? Let him know that he needs to try and start listening so that nothing happens.

I am wishing you the best of luck and I hope that you will keep us updated.


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