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Friends and Family Everyone has disagreements, even best friends and family. If you need advice about a relationship, ask us here.

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AlwaysCaring Offline
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Unhappy ~*~ Advice Please <3 ~*~ - October 7th 2014, 04:38 PM

My parents are moving out their letting me and my younger sister who I don't get along with have the house to ourselves.
The problem is that my sister is on probation and she has been hanging out with this girl who she stole with awhile back.
She is already bragging to her about having her come over all the time to party and hang out when our parents are out of the house.
And their really mean, really rude to me, they bully me all the time
I have talked to my parents about this but as always they take my sisters side/words over mine they always have.
To prevent her friend from always coming over and my sister from always partying I want to let her probation officer know that she's been hanging out that girl again. I think that would be a good idea.
What do you think?

It's etheir that or letting my sister party and hang out with people who she probably shouldn't be, also letting them be mean, rude, bully me
What would you do?
   
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Re: ~*~ Advice Please <3 ~*~ - October 7th 2014, 05:01 PM

I would find a way to get out of this situation. I would talk to your sister about it first. Maybe this is something that can be resolved without going to the PO?
   
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Re: ~*~ Advice Please <3 ~*~ - October 7th 2014, 05:03 PM

I have tried talking to my sister about it she won't listen
She's the kind of person who doesn't listen to anyone &
the kind of person who thinks that she can do whatever she wants whenever she wants.

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Originally Posted by Proud90sKid View Post
I would find a way to get out of this situation. I would talk to your sister about it first. Maybe this is something that can be resolved without going to the PO?
   
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Re: ~*~ Advice Please <3 ~*~ - October 7th 2014, 05:12 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by AlwaysCaring View Post
I have tried talking to my sister about it she won't listen
She's the kind of person who doesn't listen to anyone &
the kind of person who thinks that she can do whatever she wants whenever she wants.
im just saying that telling the probation officer will could make it so that you and your sister have even more problems with each other. espescially if there is a chance your sister could get into trouble if you told the PO officer. I understand you need to get out of this situation- but you need to be sure she doesnt get in trouble by you telling.
   
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Re: ~*~ Advice Please <3 ~*~ - October 7th 2014, 05:19 PM

Me & her have never really gotten along.
I don't really care if she get's in trouble for me telling.
She will never learn because our parents always enable her.
She knows that she shouldn't hang out with that girl.
She's risking getting into trouble which is really stupid because she's risking getting into trouble again.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Proud90sKid View Post
im just saying that telling the probation officer will could make it so that you and your sister have even more problems with each other. espescially if there is a chance your sister could get into trouble if you told the PO officer. I understand you need to get out of this situation- but you need to be sure she doesnt get in trouble by you telling.
   
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Re: ~*~ Advice Please <3 ~*~ - October 7th 2014, 08:38 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by AlwaysCaring View Post
I have tried talking to my sister about it she won't listen
She's the kind of person who doesn't listen to anyone &
the kind of person who thinks that she can do whatever she wants whenever she wants.
Sounds like some people I know, unfortunately, since those people are mostly in prison now. The only going I can think of is to take her to see someone who's been there and done that.


"And will I tell you that these three lived happily ever after? I will not, for no one ever does. But there was happiness. And they did live." - Stephen King
never's the word God listens for when he needs a laugh.- Stephen King

Battles that last five minutes spawn legends that live a thousand years.
Stephen King, The Dark Tower (The Dark Tower, #7)
   
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Re: ~*~ Advice Please <3 ~*~ - October 7th 2014, 10:44 PM

I honestly would sit your sister down and talk to her about this and tell her how you feel and that her friends don't treat you right. Tell her that if she does have those friends come over and mess things up and throw parties you will be going to her PO for her safety.


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Seeing is deceiving, dreaming is believing,
It's okay not to be okay
Sometimes it's hard, to follow your heart
Tears don't mean you're losing, everybody's bruising,
Just be true to who you are
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Re: ~*~ Advice Please <3 ~*~ - October 7th 2014, 11:43 PM

I know only one person who has been to prison but I don't think that what she has to say will change my sister's way's.
She knows she's risking it. She just doesn't care.

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Originally Posted by livingdeadboy View Post
Sounds like some people I know, unfortunately, since those people are mostly in prison now. The only going I can think of is to take her to see someone who's been there and done that.
   
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Re: ~*~ Advice Please <3 ~*~ - October 7th 2014, 11:46 PM

I have tried talking to her she won't listen
If I threaten to tell her po on her than she will tell our parents since she's a tata tale & She will keep getting away with stuff like she alway's has since our parents have alway's enabled her & they continue to/

Quote:
Originally Posted by *Tinker Bell* View Post
I honestly would sit your sister down and talk to her about this and tell her how you feel and that her friends don't treat you right. Tell her that if she does have those friends come over and mess things up and throw parties you will be going to her PO for her safety.
   
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Re: ~*~ Advice Please <3 ~*~ - October 10th 2014, 04:14 PM

Hey there,

Is there maybe someone your sister does listen to, that you could talk to? A teacher, coach, friend or someone like that, who maybe would be able to talk some sense into her appat from her PO? If there is, try asking them for help.
Also I know you said your parents always take her side, but maybe you could try sitting down with them and trying to make them aware of her situation. I'm quite sure they don't want her to go to prison, so if you can make them realice, what your sister is risking, they may do something about it.

Until you get this sorted out, maybe you can get a good lock in your door if you haven't already. It may not stopp them from partying and being loud and won't solve anything, but at least you could hid away in your room where her friends won't be able to bully and insult you.


It's ok to give in to an urge or make a mistake. You are only human and we all have our flaws. We all have our weak moments and we all make mistakes. Thats what makes us human.
Thats what makes us unique and beautiful

Courage isn't always a loud roar. Sometimes it is a quiet whisper at the end of a day saying: Tomorrow I will try it again!

   
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Re: ~*~ Advice Please <3 ~*~ - October 10th 2014, 06:58 PM

Have her talk with me then. I'll scare her straight.


"And will I tell you that these three lived happily ever after? I will not, for no one ever does. But there was happiness. And they did live." - Stephen King
never's the word God listens for when he needs a laugh.- Stephen King

Battles that last five minutes spawn legends that live a thousand years.
Stephen King, The Dark Tower (The Dark Tower, #7)
   
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Re: ~*~ Advice Please <3 ~*~ - October 10th 2014, 11:30 PM

She won't listen to anyone expect that girl who she got in trouble with before. Who she has been hanging out with a lot.

I have tried talking to them they said that they can't continue to make her listen that they can't continue to be around her all the time, etc.

They know that she's been hanging out with her a lot but their's nothing that they can do about it.

They can't make her listen.
No one can because she say's that she can do whatever she wants whenever she wants.

I can try to get a lock but it still will suck.




Quote:
Originally Posted by Etari View Post
Hey there,

Is there maybe someone your sister does listen to, that you could talk to? A teacher, coach, friend or someone like that, who maybe would be able to talk some sense into her appat from her PO? If there is, try asking them for help.
Also I know you said your parents always take her side, but maybe you could try sitting down with them and trying to make them aware of her situation. I'm quite sure they don't want her to go to prison, so if you can make them realice, what your sister is risking, they may do something about it.

Until you get this sorted out, maybe you can get a good lock in your door if you haven't already. It may not stopp them from partying and being loud and won't solve anything, but at least you could hid away in your room where her friends won't be able to bully and insult you.
   
  (#13 (permalink)) Old
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Re: ~*~ Advice Please <3 ~*~ - October 11th 2014, 03:20 PM

Hmm, that sucks.

Well it sounds like there is nothing you can really do, to change her mind. That way she will probably end up getting herself in a lot of trouble.
I would just ask you to think twice about talking to her PO since if you do so and she gets in trouble because of it, even if she is the one in the wrong, she and others might blame you for it. That may or may not get you in trouble as well, so really think this through.

Appart from that, what you could also do, once you live alone with her is fight back. Don't!!! start bitching at her or stuff, but there are some actions you can take.
For once I think there is a law about loud music and noises at night. Look the times up and if they are to loud tell them you will call the police and if they aren't quieter, do so. You life there as well and you have every right to sleep at night.
Also, there's that awesome thing nearly everyhouse has. It's called cutout switch or fuse(according to my dictionary^^). If it's safe, but really only if it's safe, get yourself a flashlight and take it out. You can't throw a party without electricity.
Furthermore, cleaning up after the party. Well, it's her party so she has to clean up. With freedom come responsibilitys, so maybe after she has to clean up after a few partys she will think twice of throwing another. That is, if you don't clean up for her.
Won't stopp your sister hanging out with those people, but may stop her from throwing partys at your place.
I know some people maight say, that this is not a good solution (and they may be right) but I don't think you should let her walk all over you.

And who knows, once she lifes on her own and actually has to do stuff like cleaning and grocerie shopping and such, she may actually start being more responsible. It can change people.


It's ok to give in to an urge or make a mistake. You are only human and we all have our flaws. We all have our weak moments and we all make mistakes. Thats what makes us human.
Thats what makes us unique and beautiful

Courage isn't always a loud roar. Sometimes it is a quiet whisper at the end of a day saying: Tomorrow I will try it again!

   
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Re: ~*~ Advice Please <3 ~*~ - October 11th 2014, 06:24 PM

She bitches at me all the time and she's hard headed which means no one can get thru to her.
She knows that she's doing wrong by hanging out with that girl she's just risking getting in trouble on her own.
I don't think their's any reason not to tell on her.
I don't get along with her, she's a bitch to me, she yells at me, calls me bad names, makes front of me, say's rumors about me behind my back to people, acts like she can boss me around by telling me to do stuff for her because she's to lazy to do them herself and if I don't do what she say's she yells at me, I can't even trust her because she stole $30.00 from me, she get's into my business too.
She's a complete bitch to me
I get so sick of the way she treats me She's one of them heartless people.She only thinks about herself not anyone else. She's selfish.

And she makes her cat sleep with her which is just wrong because it's against the cat's will she puts the cat under her covers and won't let it go even though it keeps trying to get away from her and it cries It's sad
But I can't do anything because she say's that it's her cat
Our parents tell her to let it go and she won't even listen to them


Who cares if she get's locked up again?
I don't because she treats me like crap
They can blame me but they have no proof of it.
My cousin got told on by someone for hanging out with this guy that she She wasn't supposed and she never found out who told on her she still doesn't know from this day.
If I tell our parents will just try getting the brat out of trouble like they
alway's do because they enable her so much.

She has lived on her own before my mom & I alway's seen beer bottles & cans laying on her floor whenever we went over to her place.

She's not a responsible person she never has been.
For 2 months in a row she used all of her pay check on stuff that she didn't really need like movies so she doesn't have any money to pay her cell phone bill and she asked our parents to 2 months in a row now.

Our dad asked her when will she ever grow up.

I don't think she ever will.

She was locked up in jail for a year before and it seems like she didn't learn yet.

She should follow her probation rules and not risk getting locked up again
it's not that hard!!!
Everyone thinks she's stupid my mom kept saying to me the other day when we took her to test at the probation office:
'' She's so stupid''

She would get in trouble already if her probation officer looks at her facebook or that girls (her friends).



Quote:
Originally Posted by Etari View Post
Hmm, that sucks.

Well it sounds like there is nothing you can really do, to change her mind. That way she will probably end up getting herself in a lot of trouble.
I would just ask you to think twice about talking to her PO since if you do so and she gets in trouble because of it, even if she is the one in the wrong, she and others might blame you for it. That may or may not get you in trouble as well, so really think this through.

Appart from that, what you could also do, once you live alone with her is fight back. Don't!!! start bitching at her or stuff, but there are some actions you can take.
For once I think there is a law about loud music and noises at night. Look the times up and if they are to loud tell them you will call the police and if they aren't quieter, do so. You life there as well and you have every right to sleep at night.
Also, there's that awesome thing nearly everyhouse has. It's called cutout switch or fuse(according to my dictionary^^). If it's safe, but really only if it's safe, get yourself a flashlight and take it out. You can't throw a party without electricity.
Furthermore, cleaning up after the party. Well, it's her party so she has to clean up. With freedom come responsibilitys, so maybe after she has to clean up after a few partys she will think twice of throwing another. That is, if you don't clean up for her.
Won't stopp your sister hanging out with those people, but may stop her from throwing partys at your place.
I know some people maight say, that this is not a good solution (and they may be right) but I don't think you should let her walk all over you.

And who knows, once she lifes on her own and actually has to do stuff like cleaning and grocerie shopping and such, she may actually start being more responsible. It can change people.
   
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