Support Forums Today's Posts

Get Advice Connect with TeenHelp Resources
HelpLINK Facebook     Twitter     Tumblr     Instagram    Hotlines    Safety Zone    Alternatives

You are not registered or have not logged in

Hello guest! (Not a guest? Log in above!)

As a guest on TeenHelp you are only able to use some of our site's features. By registering an account you will be able to enjoy unlimited access to our site, and will be able to:

  • Connect with thousands of teenagers worldwide by actively taking part in our Support Forums and Chat Room.
  • Find others with similar interests in our Social Groups.
  • Express yourself through our Blogs, Picture Albums and User Profiles.
  • And much much more!

Signing up is free, anonymous and will only take a few moments, so click here to register now!

Friends and Family Everyone has disagreements, even best friends and family. If you need advice about a relationship, ask us here.

Closed Thread
Thread Tools Search this Thread Rate Thread
  (#1 (permalink)) Old
Doctor's Companion
I've been here a while
Raggedy Man, Goodnight!'s Avatar
Name: Michaela
Age: 30
Gender: Female
Location: Durham, United Kingdom

Posts: 1,203
Blog Entries: 53
Join Date: January 20th 2009

Going on about my weight - October 5th 2015, 09:07 AM

This thread has been labeled as triggering, particularly on the subject of peer pressure or bullying, by the original poster or by a Moderator. The contents of this thread might therefore not be suitable for certain sensitive users. Please take this into consideration before continuing to read.

Hi guys, well my mother keeps going on about my weight all the time, yet she is like twice the size of me and all because she won't do anything about her own weight, she needs to bully me about mine. I won't post how much I weigh as I get embarrassed but I am starting a diet today of just salad l, I will prove that I can lose weight and then maybe she will stop bullying me
  Send a message via MSN to Raggedy Man, Goodnight!  
  (#2 (permalink)) Old
Always * Offline
I can't get enough
Always *'s Avatar
Age: 28
Gender: Female
Location: Hogwarts

Posts: 3,169
Blog Entries: 2
Join Date: April 12th 2012

Re: Going on about my weight - October 5th 2015, 02:48 PM

Hey Michaela, your mom might be like my dad - he used to harp about my weight because he didn't want me to "end up like him". It's obviously not the right or healthy approach, and I know it seems contradictory for a parent who is even heavier than yourself to try to tell you how to live your life or handle your weight, but it's possible that your moms cruel seeming criticisms come from a misguided place of concern.

As someone who can relate to your experiences, please don't do any extreme diets and don't try to lose weight just to prove to your mom or other people that you can. It ultimately won't make you feel any better. Being overweight is nothing to be ashamed of. However, if you feel that it is time to change something, that's ok to do as well. Just remember to do it for you. Things like salads just do not provide you with the kind of nutritional fulfillment that you need, you'll constantly be hungry. I know that your mom's approach is hurtful, and I know how absolutely awful it can make you feel when people begin voicing the worst things that you feel about yourself, but in the long run, you'll feel so much better about yourself if you do this the healthy way, even if that doesn't make you feel better now. You could even try talking to a nutritionist who can give you some unbiased advice about healthy changes in your life.

Ultimately, you cannot control your moms way of thinking. It might help if you try talking to her though. Just letting her know that wat she says hurts you and that it really isn't helpful , useful or kind for her to do things such as X, Y and Z. You can't make her think differently but you can tell her that the things she says outloud are counter productive, and that'll help a lot. Sticking up for yourself and saying that, no, this isn't helpful, can be a really good approach to taking control of the way that you see your body and making a healthy change

Feel free to PM me if you ever need to chat or have questions
  (#3 (permalink)) Old
Doctor's Companion
I've been here a while
Raggedy Man, Goodnight!'s Avatar
Name: Michaela
Age: 30
Gender: Female
Location: Durham, United Kingdom

Posts: 1,203
Blog Entries: 53
Join Date: January 20th 2009

Re: Going on about my weight - October 5th 2015, 06:01 PM

I have tried talking to her but she is still being cruel. My dad isn't impressed that she keeps going on at me about it. But no matter how much I try to talk to her it just causes more upset. This isn't the only problems she is causing. She hasn't been a nice mother in 10 years to me and I blame myself for a lot of things that aren't my fault because of her. I always thought that it was my fault that she had changed toward me but my dad said it was nobodies fault and that she has just changed into a cruel person. I just can't take her crap anymore. Even my dad can see that I am struggling to cope with the things she causes, but I don't like to bother him with my problems. Would rather try and sort them out on my own, but every problem I've tried to sort between my mother and she goes on like a child and then has a nerve to say I am the immature one. I try to make an effort to sit and talk to her calmly but she ends off shouting and causing an argument that wasn't necassery in the first place. I can't talk to her about anything. My mother is gone, I don't feel like we have a bond anymore and even my dad says we don't. All she does is just puts me down and causes problems and we argue all the time. I don't even want to argue, I want to get on with her but she doesn't let me. She shouts at me all the time for nothing, says I'm lazy yet I do the housework for her every single day and I don't even get a thank you and she accuses me of not doing it when she can clearly see it has been. I'm just so fed up of it right now. I try and try over and over again to make things better between us but she makes no effort to meet me in the middle
  Send a message via MSN to Raggedy Man, Goodnight!  
  (#4 (permalink)) Old
Welcome me, I'm new!
InvisibleBeaver5's Avatar
Name: John
Age: 19
Gender: Male
Location: Planet Earth

Posts: 13
Join Date: October 1st 2015

Re: Going on about my weight - October 5th 2015, 09:19 PM

Hey Michaela
I was overweight myself at one point, but I've never experienced the crap you're dealing with right now.
My best guess is that your mother is acting like a traditional grade school bully, masking their insecurities with agression. Your mother may very well be ashamed of her weight, and taking it out on you to help her feel better.
I suggest you ask her about it. If she starts up again about your weight, cut her off and tell her that you're dobe, and explain how you feel.
Best I can suggest for now.
Good luck!
Closed Thread



Thread Tools Search this Thread
Search this Thread:

Advanced Search
Rate This Thread
Rate This Thread:

Posting Rules
You may post new threads
You may post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are Off
Pingbacks are Off
Refbacks are Off

All material copyright 1998-2020, TeenHelp.
Terms | Legal | Privacy | Conduct | Complaints | Mobile

Powered by vBulletin®.
Copyright ©2000-2020, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.
Search engine optimization by vBSEO.
Theme developed in association with vBStyles.