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Friends and Family Everyone has disagreements, even best friends and family. If you need advice about a relationship, ask us here.

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Shaydow Offline
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Question How can I tell if i'm being used - November 22nd 2015, 11:56 PM

I've been friends with a guy named Jared for over six years and we are really close now! But I think he might be using me because he's lied to me and when I call him out on them he makes up an excuse for it. He told me he was a virgin and I know for a fact he's not because my best friend took his virginity.. How can I tell if he is just using me?
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Re: How can I tell if i'm being used - November 23rd 2015, 02:04 AM

Perhaps you can elaborate about under what circumstances he's using you? So far he sounds like he's a bit of a liar, but unless he's trying to have sex with you and claiming to be a virgin, I'm not sure how him having had sex with your bestie = him using you. Obviously, lying is bad and it's totally not something I condone in a relationship (romantic, platonic, business or otherwise) but he might not be using you, if you catch my drift.

That said, you're clearly uncomfortable with some aspects of the relationship, which is why you're here, and that's the important part. I think it is important that you think about what bothers you, form a nice statement/position (What ever you want to call it) and then consider talking to your friend and outlining how X or Y behaviours make you uncomfortable or upset. Ideally, if you confront him, he'll be adult enough to reflect on his behaviour and try to improve.

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Last edited by Always *; November 23rd 2015 at 08:36 PM.
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Re: How can I tell if i'm being used - November 23rd 2015, 05:08 PM

Hey there,

In what way do you think he might be using you? He sounds like a liar and probably not the best person to strike up a friendship with because people who tend to lie about things like this will more than likely lie about the bigger things. Someone like this isn't the most positive person to have in your life.

I wish you the best of luck,

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