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Friends and Family Everyone has disagreements, even best friends and family. If you need advice about a relationship, ask us here.

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pikachan Offline
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Unhappy All of my friends hate me. - December 20th 2015, 05:13 AM

So i had a group of 3 friends, everything was fine at the beginning of the week and from there it all went downhill... I was dating one of the friends in my group (d) and then i ended up in a fight with my other friend (f) and F said i was using D. So, i stopped talking to him and then two days ago i asked my bf (d) to meet me for lunch and my other friend to meet me for lunch too (also d) (reminder these are the same people in my group) i waited and waited and they never came to meet me, so i ended up eating lunch by myself. after school i messaged them asking why they werent there and they both made the same excuse that they "forgot" well, i put two and two together and realized they ditched me to go to lunch together. i asked my bf (d) why he lied to me and then he totally went off on me. he said that he, and my other two friends were "sick of your B****ing and complaining" and that they were sick of me. i messaged them , apologizing for whatever i had done and they blew me off.
   
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Re: All of my friends hate me. - December 20th 2015, 06:06 AM

Hey,

That sounds like a tough situation. I think the best thing to do at this point is just to try and leave them alone for a bit and give them a few days to cool off. After a while, if they don't approach you first, try talking to them again. You don't have to apologise as you have already done that and they blew you off but you did what you could. If you leave them for a few days, they will most likely calm down a bit and you will be able to have a reasonable discussion with you. There is nothing else you can do at this point, the rest is up to whether or not they try and explain what is bothering them.

Until they are ready to talk to you, you could try hanging out with different friends, or if you don't have any others, you could try and get to know some of the other kids. Don't stress over the argument and the friendship as what happened isn't your fault, you didn't provoke it and you did all you could to try and mend the argument that happened beforehand. Just try and take a few days for yourself and make sure you are staying healthy and calm.

I hope the friendship improves and it all goes well.


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Re: All of my friends hate me. - December 25th 2015, 08:38 AM

Hello Maya

If they treat you that way and don't even consider your feelings, then they might not be good friends in the first place. Ditching people like this and not treating them nicely only means that they might not really be nice people to begin with, and you probably deserve better. Maybe it's time you got to know some of the other people, and this time.. go for the nice people who appreciate others ( I get the feeling that you're one of these as well ) and remember to just be yourself. If those other people continue to treat you badly, then that's even more proof that they were never really friends in the first place.

Friends should have the ability to forgive and help people out. Of course, there is a limit to that but at least they should be compassionate and nice.

Most of all, don't blame yourself. These things happen, but you'll learn from it and become a stronger person. Heck , you might even get to meet people who're nice, appreciative and caring.. which is the biggest blessing you can get.

If you need someone to rant to or just need a friend, remember that I'm always here. You'll be able to overcome this situation!


It's called a tunnel because there's ALWAYS a light at the end.



rant to me if there's anything!

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As usual... pm me if you are ever having a tough day, and I'll respond immediately.

You guys deserve to be happy no matter what.. okay? You people are a bunch of lovelies ... and no matter what, you people deserve to be happy.
   
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Re: All of my friends hate me. - December 26th 2015, 06:58 PM

I'm sorry that your friends have made you feel that way. It sounds like a really tough situation to be in. They have handled the situation poorly, evidently, by shutting you out and then getting angry with you when you were upset because they decided to not show up to plans that they'd agreed to show up to. That's obviously wrong and, in my honest opinion, speaks more to their characters than yours; they behaved with immaturity and cruelty. If they felt like you had been "whining and bitching" and were feeling upset or stressed out by your behaviours, instead of just deciding to shut you or or purposefully blowing you off and then flipping out on you, they should have talked to you and said "we feel like you are doing X, Y, and Z and it is really upsetting and stressful for us, if you are going through something, then we'd like to help you, but can you maybe complain less and maybe speak about it more constructively", or something like that. As such, I don't think your friends sound like they're being the greatest friends to you, which is really too bad.

For now, I would suggest that you just give them some space. Perhaps at some point you can approach maybe your boyfriend, ask him if he can let you know more about the things that upset him and you can tell him how he acted poorly in response and then maybe you can talk to the others as well and begin to repair the damage. Now, that's one option. The other option is to give them space and maybe think long and hard about whether you want to continue to be friends with people who will treat you so poorly if they decide you're doing something they don't like. Perhaps you'd be better off setting them to the side, letting your relationships with them be what they'll be and then start focusing on other relationships in your life where you'll likely be better treated.




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