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Friends and Family Everyone has disagreements, even best friends and family. If you need advice about a relationship, ask us here.

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MadPoet Offline
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Name: Amanda.
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My family is so judgmental. - May 23rd 2009, 05:06 PM

Ugh! I wish I could knock some sense into my stupid family. =/
I understand that they may not understand certain things, but why be so judgmental? "Everyone who has a tattoo or a piercing or dye their hair are complete trash." Yeah, like everyone whose not like them is trash? I remember them saying "people who self harm and hurt themselves merely want attention and are basically freaks." Why do they have to say things like that, and be so stupid!? Right, everyone not exactly like them, not the same religion, anything like that, are trash. I hope I'm never like that, I really hope I can be more open minded than them. If I ever have a family, I'm going to let them believe what they want to be, be whatever they want, without feeling like complete shit because of who they are. I'm so tired of being the 'perfect' person that my family wants me to be. That's just not who I am. Maybe they'll define me as trash and never look at me the same way, but I'm so sick of feeling like I can't be myself, even around my own family. It just doesn't seem right. I wish I could be enough for everyone...





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Re: My family is so judgmental. - May 23rd 2009, 05:27 PM

Oh Amanda, I sympathise. My parents are similar, they have to judge everyone and make the most ridiculous statements about self harm and stuff, oblivious to the fact that their daughter is 'one of those self harmer types'
Honestly, half of the stuff they say just makes them look silly. I don't really know what to say Amanda. I just want you to know that you're not alone in this. I guess you could try and argue back as to why they should be less judgemental, if you think that they would be willing to listen and to accept - I think that's the only thing that you could actively do.
Please don't feel as though you can't be yourself because of your family. Be who you want to be, you're an individual and it's your own right.
   
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Re: My family is so judgmental. - May 23rd 2009, 05:58 PM

hey, I know what you mean and I understand your feelings.

One thing that may help, even though it sounds really hard, is remember that no matter what, they cannot take away your individuality and your sense of self. Be proud of yourself and don't let their judgements influence your decisions. You are a good person and a better person than they are for being open minded. Don't let them bring you down; try to educate them instead.
   
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