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Friends and Family Everyone has disagreements, even best friends and family. If you need advice about a relationship, ask us here.

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London1621 Offline
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Please don't. - September 20th 2017, 01:13 AM

My parents have been fighting a lot more than what they have been doing. I asked my sister what is going on and why are they fighting so much again, she said that they said if they can't work it out then they will just get a divorce. I got upset because I don't want this to happen. I know that they fight, but I can't handle this if they do this. I go up to my parents and say are you going to get a divorce, and they said that they don't know yet. They are going through something's and are not sure what to do. I started crying because I don't want this to happen and my parents said don't worry everything will be ok. But it's not going to be ok, why do parents even think of divorce? I don't know what to do. I need everything to be ok. Can someone please help me with this?
   
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Re: Please don't. - September 20th 2017, 04:40 PM

You asked why parents consider getting a divorce and although it varies for everyone something that may be underlying is that parents may believe that they can give themselves and their children a better quality of life if they are separated. Additionally, while parents need to take care of their children they also need to take care of themselves so they can be the best they can be for everyone else. Perhaps some parents need to get a divorce in order to take care of themselves.

It is definitely understandable to feel upset but know that your parents and their decision on whether or not to get a divorce is out of your hands. It is something they have to decide for themselves and surely they will take you and your sister into consideration.

In the meantime, maybe you could allow yourself to feel your feelings. Know that it is okay to cry. Even though crying is sometimes uncomfortable it is a good outlet. So, feel what you're feeling and express your feelings in a healthy way. You could also distract yourself to keep your mind busy, or lean on your sister as the two of you are both impacted by your parents' fighting and the possibility of divorce.

Keep hanging on.


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Re: Please don't. - September 21st 2017, 03:24 PM

Hey! I came from a broken family myself. When I was around your age, I used to think why must my parents divorce and I kinda hated them for that. However, at my age now, I realised that the divorce made them happier.

Though I live with my mum now, I don't feel any significant difference since I meet my dad regularly and it feels like nothing has changed. Well, I do envy my friends for having family dinners daily but at the end of the day, I honestly feel happy for my parents because they no longer have to argue day and night anymore.
   
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Re: Please don't. - September 22nd 2017, 06:27 PM

Ok for what you are saying. Thank you.
   
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Re: Please don't. - September 29th 2017, 03:49 AM

I keep asking my parents different ways to not talk about getting a divorce. They just say not to worry. That's all I am doing. I can't help it, it's hard not to get upset.
   
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Re: Please don't. - October 1st 2017, 01:42 PM

It is very understandable for you to worry as you're going through a lot right now. Your parents have told you not to worry, but have you explained any of your feelings to them? It might help if you tell them that you are worried and upset by this so they are aware of your feelings.

If you don't want to talk to them or can't talk to them right now, you could write your feelings down or blog here on the site to see if that helps. Writing about what you're going through can be very beneficial; it might help clear your mind.

Things seem up in the air right now and that must be really hard for you. Just keep holding on, though. You can do this. Take it one day at a time.


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Re: Please don't. - October 1st 2017, 10:08 PM

No I haven't, but I can try telling them how I feel. Ok and thank you.
   
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