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Friends and Family Everyone has disagreements, even best friends and family. If you need advice about a relationship, ask us here.

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anonymous178 Offline
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Unhappy i donít have any close friends - October 7th 2017, 07:30 PM

i’ve been struggling with this for a while now and i’m crying as I write this because i feel so pathetic. i want to have a best friend i’m able to talk to and hang out with all the time and be so close to with and laugh about everything together. but i have nothing like that. i only know about friendships like that from movies i watch by myself. i can’t make friends because i’m a spaz. i’m mean. i’m annoying. nobody in their right mind would choose me as a friend out of everyone else in my school. i keep feeling sorry for myself and feeling like a victim whenever i see my friends hanging out without me. but im pretty sure i bring all this on myself. i think. i don’t know. i’m just so confused. when i text my “friends” asking for help with stuff like homework, they usually ignore me. and if i invite them to do things, sometimes they don’t respond or they make excuses that are probably not true. i feel like they hate me for no reason but on the other hand i feel like they have good reasons to hate me. i brag a lot about my grades and the fact that i play soccer with the cool kids in my grade because i’m so insecure. i bring people down to make me feel good about myself. and that’s so awful. but for some reason i do it anyway. i don’t want to but i feel this strong urge to. i hate myself for it. i try so hard to be one of those so unbelievably nice kids like my brother who is so humble and never mean no matter what. he even got a citizenship award last year for being such an all around good person. and that’s what i want to be. but i just canttt. i really want to change but i feel like people just don’t change. you’re born who you are and that’s how you stay. at some points i feel like i’m better than other people who aren’t popular. i feel like i’m better than people who don’t dress cool. and I HATE THAT I HAVE THESE FEELINGS. but i guess they’re the reason i don’t have any close friends. or any friends at all really. i try to act like i have a lot but really i’m so desperate. i want to do this club at school to get community service hours and i decided i wanted to ask some friends to sign up with me. but then it just clicked. i have nobody to ask. the people i talk to don’t even seem to like me and they always get so frustrated with me because i’m SO ANNOYING. i want friends. i want to have fun. but i’m too mean of a person for that. i’m a bully. i don’t want to be and it’s hard to accept that but it’s what i am. and i don’t know how to change and i don’t know how to make friends. and that’s why i’m asking for advice. every person i become close with sees my true colors and hates me after that. so what can i do to make sure that doesn’t happen? i know this is really long and i appreciate you so much if you read this.

if you’re reading this, please take the time to give me some advice on this.. i go back to school tomorrow and i don’t know what i should do or how i should act. i don’t know if it’s my fault or it’s my friends fault that i never get invited anywhere. i don’t know if i should be extra nice or if i should back away and give them space. ive only had advice from one person so if you have anything you can say that would help me, that would be so great.

Last edited by anonymous178; October 9th 2017 at 01:59 PM.
   
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Abbidabbidoo Offline
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Re: i donít have any close friends - October 7th 2017, 08:13 PM

First off you have to stop being so hard on yourself. If you do have some of those not so good attributes then start working on them instead of putting yourself down for having them. Become more positive about yourself and people will notice that of you and people want to be around positive people.

I sort of know where you are coming from. I have some close friends which are much more distant friends now since I became pregnant and had my baby 2 months ago. That is mostly because I have no time to spend with my friends and I can totally understand where they are coming from as I am not much the reliable friend any longer.

As for you though I think you have to work on being more positive about yourself and like I said people seem to like being around positive people. Good Luck with that.
   
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anonymous178 Offline
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Re: i donít have any close friends - October 7th 2017, 09:48 PM

thank you so much.. that helps. are you a single mom? that must be tough at 15. i wish you and your baby the best of luck!!
   
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Abbidabbidoo Offline
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Re: i donít have any close friends - October 7th 2017, 10:12 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by anonymous178 View Post
thank you so much.. that helps. are you a single mom? that must be tough at 15. i wish you and your baby the best of luck!!
Thank U and yes I am a single teen mom at 15 on a wonderful 2 month old baby boy that I love so much. Yes it is very hard and without the help of my Mom who was also a single Mom and raised me I have no idea how I'd make it, but I take it one day at a time. I also do online school and am in the 10th Grade so I am quite busy.
   
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Re: i donít have any close friends - October 8th 2017, 01:17 AM

i’m 14 and i could never imagine having a child of my own. you must be so strong to be able to do this all on your own. i’m sure you’ll give your baby a great life
   
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Re: i donít have any close friends - October 8th 2017, 01:32 AM

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iím 14 and i could never imagine having a child of my own. you must be so strong to be able to do this all on your own. iím sure youíll give your baby a great life
Thank U, I do have the help of my Mom who was also a single Mom and raised me but didn't have me as young as I had my baby. It is hard but believe me if you were in my situation you would do everything you could for your baby.
   
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