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Friends and Family Everyone has disagreements, even best friends and family. If you need advice about a relationship, ask us here.

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TH Anonymous Offline
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Estranged sibling - October 18th 2018, 11:58 PM

[SIZE="a"]I recently found out that an estranged sibling has been feeling sad and then is okay and back to feeling sad.

Our family was abusive and minimized how we felt (for me that is what I experienced) and mental health to them was seeking attention. Not being open about our feelings as its seeking attention.

We dont live with parents and on our own.

I tried to be the supportive sibling I am, but it felt like they weren't as open. I'd imagine it's because we are estranged and dont have a strong sibling relationship anymore. We do text but not daily or weekly.

I've been hesitant to really express myself and when they explained how they felt I supported them as possible. Since the relationship is very much estranged I didnt want to come off as "knowing it all". I did say that I was there for them and they can talk about anything.

When I sent it, I felt I crossed lines because we've been estranged for some time but keep in touch at least once or twice a month.

I did explain about depression and seasonal depression. They expressed they know why they are sad and it could be seasonal but not completely.

I cant force them to tell me what's going on and I dont want to either. I am concerned because I know what it's like and I am not sure if they will be open about what is going on. I dont want to pry either as its not who I am.

I am worried that my sibling is struggling silently and told me. Maybe they know I would understand. It's from a message they sent me that I feel like that. They said, "maybe that's the reason why I said something." I dont want them to bottle it up.

How would I support an estranged sibling that I dont see? We aren't close but I am slowly building it back up without being overbearing. I dont want to send messages every day asking how they are feeling. I did today. Asking all the time I would feel I am prying and I'd rather they come to me on their own.

It's easier to support friends but an estranged sibling I am not sure what to actually do. Maybe I am doing what I am suppose to but something doesnt feel right to me.[/size]
   
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Re: Estranged sibling - November 9th 2018, 06:40 AM

In any case, you will feel embarrassed, because it is a difficult choice whose side to support
   
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Re: Estranged sibling - November 9th 2018, 08:11 AM

the situation is really complicated...


I'm selfish, impatient and a little insecure. I make mistakes, I am out of control and at times hard to handle. But if you can't handle me at my worst, then you sure as hell don't deserve me at my best
   
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Re: Estranged sibling - November 9th 2018, 03:52 PM

Everything's going to be OK
   
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Re: Estranged sibling - November 12th 2018, 05:22 AM

Difficult situation, I do not even know how to help you then. You just hold on and hope for the best!
   
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