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  (#1 (permalink)) Old
Omar the Lobster!
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7 Year Old Sister's Friend: "Gays are stupid" - May 28th 2009, 11:51 PM

Yeah so I was chillin here with my little sister and her friend is over, and I really don't like her that much but if I say anything, my mom will pull the old "I'm the mom" thing and then completely ignore anything else I say. So anyway they're just chillen and then something on the TV mentioned gay people or gay rights or something, and my sister's little friend pipes up, "Gays are stupid!"
SO OF COURSE I'M LIKE WTF. But it turns out, I found out from my younger sister Nicole, who babysits this little shit, her mom goes on about gay people and blah blah for some odd reason or whatever.
So of course, I don't really feel comfortable, ESPECIALLY NOW, with Shelby hanging out with this little bitchbag. But now god forbid something about gays comes up again and then she starts telling my littlest sister that gay people are stupid...jesus christ. I'm going to freak. Her mom is totally entitled to whatever she wants to think, but fucking hell if I'm gunna sit back and let her talk anti-gay junk to my sister.

How should I deal with this?


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  (#2 (permalink)) Old
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Re: 7 Year Old Sister's Friend: "Gays are stupid" - May 28th 2009, 11:59 PM

Hi there,

I know it's difficult to deal with this, but try to understand that your sister's friend probably doesn't understand what she's saying, how it affects others, and how wrong her mom's statements are. It's always sad when parents push their negative views on their children, but it's a child's nature to believe their parents.

The best thing to do right now would be to educate your sister and make sure she doesn't pay any attention to this girl's mother or the mean things she says. You can't stop the friend's mother from talking, but maybe if it comes up and she does say those things to your sister then you and your mom could have a good long talk with her. It may be a good idea, if the mother goes on about those views, to keep your sister away from that friend's house. They could always hang out at your house or at the park or something.

Good luck.

Nat.


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  (#3 (permalink)) Old
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Re: 7 Year Old Sister's Friend: "Gays are stupid" - May 29th 2009, 12:33 AM

Nat is so right. Little kids opinions are mostly just their parents opinions because it rubs off on them. Just brush it off, she's only a child anyway. Not like you can really try and talk sense into a little girl.
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Re: 7 Year Old Sister's Friend: "Gays are stupid" - May 29th 2009, 01:48 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Strider View Post
Hi there,

I know it's difficult to deal with this, but try to understand that your sister's friend probably doesn't understand what she's saying, how it affects others, and how wrong her mom's statements are. It's always sad when parents push their negative views on their children, but it's a child's nature to believe their parents.
Hey Bernadette,

I agree with Nat there, i mean I could possibly go on
forever to that woman and get her to have some
kind of common sense and at the same time
you can't stop her from telling her child these
kinds of things, and yet what you can do
is educate your sister as why her
friend statements was inappropriate
and again what nat mentioned not pay
any attention from what the child is repeatedly hearing
from her mothers says and at this young age, the child
might not fully understands what is
coming out of her mouth so let us know
the updates and I wish you luck.





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  (#5 (permalink)) Old
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Re: 7 Year Old Sister's Friend: "Gays are stupid" - May 29th 2009, 02:29 AM

Yea I couldn't blame the child I would talk to the Mom about the situation.


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  (#6 (permalink)) Old
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Re: 7 Year Old Sister's Friend: "Gays are stupid" - May 29th 2009, 02:43 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Oiseau the Little Bird! View Post
Yeah so I was chillin here with my little sister and her friend is over, and I really don't like her that much but if I say anything, my mom will pull the old "I'm the mom" thing and then completely ignore anything else I say. So anyway they're just chillen and then something on the TV mentioned gay people or gay rights or something, and my sister's little friend pipes up, "Gays are stupid!"
SO OF COURSE I'M LIKE WTF. But it turns out, I found out from my younger sister Nicole, who babysits this little shit, her mom goes on about gay people and blah blah for some odd reason or whatever.
So of course, I don't really feel comfortable, ESPECIALLY NOW, with Shelby hanging out with this little bitchbag. But now god forbid something about gays comes up again and then she starts telling my littlest sister that gay people are stupid...jesus christ. I'm going to freak. Her mom is totally entitled to whatever she wants to think, but fucking hell if I'm gunna sit back and let her talk anti-gay junk to my sister.

How should I deal with this?
As a gay person myself, it frustrates me to hear people talk like that... Chances are that the little girl's mother has no clue about homosexuality at all. She's probably uneducated when it comes to homosexuality/bisexuality. Normally when people don't understand something they fear it or reject it (for me it's calculus!).

If I were in that situation, I'd definately have to say something to her the next time she began running off at the mouth. You could simply ask her "Why do you feel that way?" the next time she says something negative about homosexuals. That way you can "politely" get your foot in the door to expressing your opposing views. I doubt her's will change but you can always try.

If you are a nonconfrontional person, you can simply ignore it.

Unfortunatly the seven year old will most likely associate her mothers "teachings" with everyday life. She'll grow up and think "Gays are stupid"... It's sad really...
   
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Re: 7 Year Old Sister's Friend: "Gays are stupid" - May 29th 2009, 01:54 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by flawed_legacy View Post
As a gay person myself, it frustrates me to hear people talk like that... Chances are that the little girl's mother has no clue about homosexuality at all. She's probably uneducated when it comes to homosexuality/bisexuality. Normally when people don't understand something they fear it or reject it (for me it's calculus!).

If I were in that situation, I'd definately have to say something to her the next time she began running off at the mouth. You could simply ask her "Why do you feel that way?" the next time she says something negative about homosexuals. That way you can "politely" get your foot in the door to expressing your opposing views. I doubt her's will change but you can always try.

If you are a nonconfrontional person, you can simply ignore it.

Unfortunatly the seven year old will most likely associate her mothers "teachings" with everyday life. She'll grow up and think "Gays are stupid"... It's sad really...

According to my sister, who babysits this little girl, her mother goes on bashing gay people because her boyfriend has a cousin who is gay, and they got into a scuffle. Which is beyond juvenile, it makes me rage that it's something so immature as "I got into a fight with him so I'm gunna talk shit on him for being gay." Ugh.


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Re: 7 Year Old Sister's Friend: "Gays are stupid" - May 29th 2009, 05:45 PM

People like that are idiots. I think you should talk to your sister, and let her know that what they are saying is not right at all. You should tell her that she shouldn't base her opinions off of that of what her friends or friend's parents might say, but that she should respect people for who they are, no matter what other people have to say about them. If you think that her friends behavior is rubbing off on her, then you could talk to the friend's mom and ask her to please not talk that way around your sister, possibly?





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Re: 7 Year Old Sister's Friend: "Gays are stupid" - May 31st 2009, 07:43 PM

homophobia is such a widespread prejudice, i'm afraid there's not much you can do to avoid it altogether. one of my own friends is homophobic, and as a bisexual i am often uncomfortable when he uses gay as an insult.

however, this kind of small-scale discrimination can be easily dealt with, if approached with maturity. you're mad with this girl -- i would be pretty angry too -- but confronting her mother with that kind of fury isn't going to get you far. calm down and get your mother's support. that way, she's much more likely to respect your opinion.

keep calm, and definitely talk to your own sister about this.

best of luck.
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Re: 7 Year Old Sister's Friend: "Gays are stupid" - June 1st 2009, 03:10 AM

She is only 7 I really doubt she knows what even "gay" means. She is bearly entering the "age of reason".


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Re: 7 Year Old Sister's Friend: "Gays are stupid" - June 1st 2009, 03:54 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Oiseau the Little Bird! View Post
Yeah so I was chillin here with my little sister and her friend is over, and I really don't like her that much but if I say anything, my mom will pull the old "I'm the mom" thing and then completely ignore anything else I say. So anyway they're just chillen and then something on the TV mentioned gay people or gay rights or something, and my sister's little friend pipes up, "Gays are stupid!"
SO OF COURSE I'M LIKE WTF. But it turns out, I found out from my younger sister Nicole, who babysits this little shit, her mom goes on about gay people and blah blah for some odd reason or whatever.
So of course, I don't really feel comfortable, ESPECIALLY NOW, with Shelby hanging out with this little bitchbag. But now god forbid something about gays comes up again and then she starts telling my littlest sister that gay people are stupid...jesus christ. I'm going to freak. Her mom is totally entitled to whatever she wants to think, but fucking hell if I'm gunna sit back and let her talk anti-gay junk to my sister.

How should I deal with this?
When you hear the kid say something like that, try and manipulate her in the right direction. Kids will usually listen to the "cooler" people. Tell her what you think. And if the mom talks to you, you put her in her place. I know of you on TH and you know what you're talking about, and I think you could have a real conversation with an adult and knock her out in a debate.


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Re: 7 Year Old Sister's Friend: "Gays are stupid" - June 1st 2009, 04:42 PM

My little sister is the same. I do believe that she'll grow out of it because she is a little too young to understand. If you're that annoyed by it then you could always talk to her about it and help her understand?


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Re: 7 Year Old Sister's Friend: "Gays are stupid" - June 1st 2009, 05:38 PM

why do you care? she's only seven and probably doesn't even know what she's saying. if you're worried about her influencing your sisters views then make sure you talk to your sister and put her right, that gay people are in fact not "stupid."

she's only a kid, i wouldn't get too worked up about it.


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