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Friends and Family Everyone has disagreements, even best friends and family. If you need advice about a relationship, ask us here.

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Mom & Younger Sis - November 17th 2018, 08:50 PM

OK, first off I want to say I love both my mom and younger sister who is 12. The problem is I feel that my mom and sis get along much better and I feel ignored a lot. My younger sis has never had issues like I have and my sister is totally the straight lace kid. While I listen to pretty most all music most people look at me as either being a Goth or Emo girl and my little sister as this pop princess in the Taylor Swift mode. Not saying Taylor doesn't make good music sometimes. My mom however just sees what I listen to as wild and crazy and the way I mostly dress as not normal and just seems to pay more attention to my sister. Now I am not saying she doesn't care about me because she definitely does. Hell she saved my life so she does care. I just I guess wish she would accept me for who I am even though it is different from her and my sisters ways.
   
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Re: Mom & Younger Sis - December 9th 2018, 02:11 PM

I think it's quite common as a teenager to start finding a sense of self and an identity of your own, only to realise that you feel slightly apart from family as well. This is also harder when you have had struggles that other family members might not have had.

I'm sorry to hear that you feel a bit left out and that your mom and sister have better relationships with each other. It is good that you love them both and realise that they love you too, even if you are feeling this way.

In general, people may gravitate towards those that they feel they have something in common with. So if you have different tastes in music and style, it's understandable that you may feel a bit left out when compared to your sister. But that doesn't mean that you or your lifestyle is any less. Maybe you can find a way to teach your mom about the things you like, and make her feel a bit included in your life? Perhaps that instead of thinking the music you listen to is just crazy, you can try to talk about the meaning of the music and what it means to you personally. Also, you can try to bond over things that your mom likes, even if it's not in your tastes. Showing interest can help your mom to realise that even if you like different things, you still want to be included.

It may be possible that your mom doesn't realise how you feel, and may assume that since you like different things then you may not feel the need to be included as much. It may help to talk to your mom and be honest that even though you know she loves you, that you are feeling a bit left out of things and want to feel more included and accepted for who you are. Then you can think of ways of how to go about doing this together.

Hope this helps a bit


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