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Friends and Family Everyone has disagreements, even best friends and family. If you need advice about a relationship, ask us here.

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Silverxy Offline
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Name: Tori
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Question Jealous - May 29th 2009, 04:32 AM

Okay, so a) I'm not sure which category to put this in, and b) I'm not quite sure how to explain my dilemma.
But I'll give it a shot anyway.
Alright, so as a bit of backstory that might help with understanding my problem; I go to a weekly acting group outside of my school and there are kids ranging from ages 10 to 17 there. One of my very good friends (I'll call her Mary) attends with me. She's two years older than I and a prettier person inside and out you couldn't meet.
Enter *insert boy's name here. Let's call him Daniel*, same age as my friend, spectacular actor, awesome guy.
Anyway, Daniel, though he has a girlfriend, flirts nonstop with Mary, and Mary flirts back. My problem is that I'm, I don't want to say in love because I don't know if I am or not, I guess that I'm in very strong like with Daniel, and I am very, very, super-jealous of my friend. Now, knowing her, if I tell her she'll feel horrible that she had accidentally made me upset and cut off Daniel completely. But because I'm not telling her, I feel like I'm lying to her in some weird way, even though it's to protect their friendship. I've got no idea what to do about this predicament. Suggestions, anyone?
   
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Re: Jealous - May 29th 2009, 08:27 PM

Hi Tori,

I think that you did a good job by putting your predicament in this section, as it is mainly about your friend and how you are unsure about what to tell her and if you should say anything.

It does sound like you've got quite the crush with this guy at your acting group, and it's completely normal that a part of you wants to talk to your friend about it. Something I'd like to mention is that some older guys do tend to 'flirt' with girls, but they don't intend it to lead anywhere. You said that this guy has a girlfriend already, so something tells me he probably isn't serious when he flirts with your friend. He may just be joking around and she could be joking back.

Your friend isn't trying to hurt you by talking with this guy, and I think there must be a way that this can get sorted out without having to cut off the contact. Maybe you could just bring it up with your friend that you were wondering why this guy has been flirting when he has a girlfriend. That would be a good conversation starter to find out what your friend really thinks about how he's acting.

Other than that, I think you should let your friend get this sorted out. Try not to be too jealous, because he is 'taken'. Maybe next time at acting class you could start the conversation between all three of you. That might make it less awkward.

Take care.

Nat.


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