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Friends and Family Everyone has disagreements, even best friends and family. If you need advice about a relationship, ask us here.

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Arrow HELP! asap... please! - June 12th 2009, 05:50 AM

[EDIT: sorry it's sooo long!!]

So, this isn't about me having trouble with a friend its about me needing to help my friend.

My friend, Will lets say, has been going through a rough patch. and I mean really rough.
His dad and step-dad both lost their jobs and I think his dad drinks, by the way Will talks about alcohol.
So bascially the other day for some reason he tells me both his dad and step dad lost their jobs and he's been sleeping at some chess club.
He didn't tell me much and I didn't (and am still not) trying to force anything out of him. I'm letting him tell me this as and when he wants to.
(btw, he's only told me, his best friends girlfriend and friend, but not anyone else including my boyfriend, his best friend.)
Anyways, today we were talking again and he told me that his dad kicked him out.
When I asked why he said it was because his dad hit his sister so he hit his dad. He asked me if what he did was justified. I said yes, because he was defending his sister.
So he's been kicked out and sleeping in a park for the last two nights and I'm really worried about him. REALLY worried. He has a job so he has some money but he's been living out of his backpack and eating when he can and I'm so scared something bads gonna happen to him. He's not even 16 yet. (He turns 16 later this year).
He's got his mother and grandparents and I should probably figure out why he won't go to them or w/e but in the meantime... I need to find a way to help him!
so any ideas?
I've been mostly just giving him some of my food, he's not one for taking help from people so I pretend I'm buying the food for myself or its for me but then i'm full or don't want it. He knows what I'm doing but I think it makes him feel better if he doesn't take it from me straight out.
It took 10 minutes of persuading to get him to eat dinner at my house.
SO HELP!!!! any advice? that i can give to him or anyway I can help him??
please?

and thank you!!!!


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Re: HELP! asap... please! - June 12th 2009, 06:01 AM

First of all, your message isn't long at all. =) So don't worry about that.

Second, I think it's great that you are doing what it is that you are doing thus far (helping him out with meals). But there is only so much you can do by yourself.

I'm not familiar with the law in Toronto... are you still considered a minor at 15 years old? Is it even legal for a parent to abandon their child? I know that in the United States, there could be legal consequences for something along those lines.

It certainly couldn't hurt to try and get to the bottom of the mother/grandparents issue. It's never safe to be homeless... and especially not at such a young age.






   
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Re: HELP! asap... please! - June 12th 2009, 06:04 AM

It sounds like what you're doing so far is pretty good its sweet of you to pretend to buy the food for yourself and then give it to him.
I agree, you should try to find out why he doesn't stay with other family. Also, is his sister safe at home?
Is there any chance that your parents or your boyfriend's parents would let him stay for a while till he gets back on his feet? Maybe he could do work around the house for room and board for a while...



PM me any time, ok? I'm always here to help.



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