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Friends and Family Everyone has disagreements, even best friends and family. If you need advice about a relationship, ask us here.

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  (#1 (permalink)) Old
BlessSpecies Offline
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Name: Jessica
Age: 28
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A Broken Home... A Seemingly Lost Relationship. - June 30th 2009, 10:45 PM

Okay I tend to allow things to go on for pages & pages (heh) so I'm going to try and write brief bullet points highlighting the main points to make things easier.

-Back in January, I was kicked out of the house by my mother. (parents divorced; she was upset that I was going to see my dad, which I do once a month every month. told me if I left, to never come back)
-Lived at a friend's house for a few months; didn't have room anymore, had no choice but to move into bf's.
-Had numerous fights with my mother over the next few months.
-Family Counseling (counselor agreed that my mother had some issues she needed to sort out)
-We've been seeing each other every now & then for the last couple of months.
-For my 18th bday, she gave me a cheap black robe. (hurt my feelings... she's very "well off" and I just felt this a slap in the face. I didn't even get a card)
-For my graduation, she gave me a quote book that she knows I'll never read and a $5 necklace. My dad, who is extremely poor, gave me $200 because he knew I needed that more than anything else, and wrote a 2 pg heartfelt letter.
-My mother hates my boyfriend and refuses to speak or even look at him.
-She has an extra car that she said she'd give to me if I went to the college SHE wanted me to go to (she was emotionally abusive & manipulative my entire life; she's trying to sell the car now to spite me)
-Had a dream last night about her and I broke down crying in the middle of the night.
-Went to lunch with her today and broke down... I told her her heartless gifts have hurt me to no end, and I wished she'd learn to support me and that I'm doing my best as a person. I told her the car thing irked me too, and that I loved her... but I couldn't deal with this anymore.

None of my family other than my mom & dad attended my graduation, which also hurt my feelings. I told her I don't want to have anything to do with them in the future... I'm tired of caring for people more than they care about me. Its driving me crazy.

So yeah... I left telling her that I didn't want to speak to her again until she actually thought things through, and understood me... and could maybe one day grow to fully support me.

I just feel so sad =( Idk how to handle things anymore. I have a feeling she's so hard-headed she won't understand or support me no matter what.


"I'm not old enough to understand girls."
"Heh, I don't think anybody lives THAT long."
   
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Re: A Broken Home... A Seemingly Lost Relationship. - June 30th 2009, 11:56 PM

There are no easy answers.
Nothing in this world worth having comes easy.
To gain anything good: first you must suffer.
If you have a dream - you must chase it.
Never give up.
   
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Re: A Broken Home... A Seemingly Lost Relationship. - July 1st 2009, 12:57 AM

hey hun, sorry that your mum makes you feel so terrible. and well i can see that your mum has issues that i know she has to get through first before she can seem more like a mother to you.. that, however, is out of your hands, so don't try to control it.
plus, you're 18 now. (: you don't have to let other people, even your mum, tell you what to do. you can stand on your own and chase after your own future. let go of the past, no matter how hard that is, because there is a life ahead of you that you can't see if you keep looking down or backwards. your dad sounds like a really supportive father, and that's a blessing in itself hun. (:
take care and i pray that someday you and your mum can really sort things out.



and the voice of truth tells me a different story
the voice of truth says "do not be afraid"
   
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BlessSpecies Offline
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Re: A Broken Home... A Seemingly Lost Relationship. - July 1st 2009, 02:28 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by floatingangel View Post
hey hun, sorry that your mum makes you feel so terrible. and well i can see that your mum has issues that i know she has to get through first before she can seem more like a mother to you.. that, however, is out of your hands, so don't try to control it.
plus, you're 18 now. (: you don't have to let other people, even your mum, tell you what to do. you can stand on your own and chase after your own future. let go of the past, no matter how hard that is, because there is a life ahead of you that you can't see if you keep looking down or backwards. your dad sounds like a really supportive father, and that's a blessing in itself hun. (:
take care and i pray that someday you and your mum can really sort things out.
Thank you... I really hope she takes the time to try to understand what I told her today =/ She's called me like 8 times since lunch & I've ignored the calls because I just can't deal with it right now.


"I'm not old enough to understand girls."
"Heh, I don't think anybody lives THAT long."
   
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