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Friends and Family Everyone has disagreements, even best friends and family. If you need advice about a relationship, ask us here.

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LucyLouWho Offline
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Name: Chelsey
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I hate trying to keep friends. It's so hard. - January 17th 2009, 09:35 PM

Well, I have this guy friend. He and I have been really good friends ever since we were little, probably around 9/10 years old. Anyway, he's had a crush on me ever since middle school and everyone knows it. He's even admitted it. Well, a bunch of friends, including him, and I usually go out bowling once in awhile and we just all hang out and have fun. Well, now he doesn't want to go with everyone. He just wants the two of us to go. Tomorrow night, he wants to take me to the new restaurant in town and then go bowling ourselves. But I don't feel right going out with another guy, although he's just a friend, while Matt's here, at home.

I have to be here tomorrow night anyway so I can wake Matt up for work, make some food for him to take to work with him, and then actually take him to work. (He doesn't have car insurance until later this week.)

I hate ditching my friends, but I'd feel more comfortable if there were others there also and not just the two of us. But he doesn't want anyone else to go, not even Matt.

I don't want to hurt his feelings by turning him down all the time, but I also don't want to go out with him by myself with Matt sitting here at home by himself while I'm out with another guy. It's just not right.


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Strider Offline
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Re: I hate trying to keep friends. It's so hard. - January 19th 2009, 07:41 PM

Hi there Chelsey,

I think you need to make it clear to this guy friend that it doesn't feel right for you to hang out with him alone. If you find this too difficult at the moment, just insist that others go with you, or plan a night to hang out and invite others before inviting this guy friend to make sure you are not alone.
I understand your concern and I think that this guy just needs to hear about it. Your other friends probably wouldn't like to be excluded from the activities anyway.

All the best,
Nat.
   
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MadPoet Offline
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Re: I hate trying to keep friends. It's so hard. - January 19th 2009, 07:45 PM

I think that it couldn't hurt to let your friend know that you don't feel comfortable going out with just him when your boyfriend sits at home by himself. I'm sure that he'll understand if you just tell him you'd love to go with him and a few other people, but that it feel awkward when it's just him and you. Good luck





A lonely soul in a land of broken hearts


   
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