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Friends and Family Everyone has disagreements, even best friends and family. If you need advice about a relationship, ask us here.

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SweetAndSour Offline
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My friend is mad at me. - July 23rd 2009, 04:33 AM

So my best friend in the entire world, who I can lay in the park together with for hours and just talk to, is now mad at me. It's not awful, she still is talking to me, but whenever I try to talk to her she acts disinterested. What happened was that well... I know its a bad awful thing, but I actually have a crush on her, and when we hang around other guys I tend to get kind of jealous, cause she acts completely different. So this time I sort of overreacted and started shunning her (only lasted about an hour or two) but the day before I had promised her I would never get mad at her. I wasn't mad but I was frustrated and now I've just made things worse. The other problem is that she doesn't think of me as very manly at all. I'm not. But her friend asked her if I was gay, which didn't help my chances very much. I need a way to come off as less sensitive and emotional to her, and also retain that she's easily my best friend.
   
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Re: My friend is mad at me. - July 23rd 2009, 10:19 PM

that is a tough situation, maybe you could talk to her about it. jealousy usually comes out when one person is attracted to the other. but i think that if you say you're sorry and explain what happened, it might get things better.


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Re: My friend is mad at me. - July 23rd 2009, 10:44 PM

Hi DJ,

I think that you really need to explain to your friend why you acted the way you did towards her. She could be upset because she believes you acted that way for a different reason and are mad at her, rather than jealous of the guys she was talking to. Instead of disinterested, she may feel uncomfortable talking and telling you how she felt about how you acted by shunning her.

It sounds like this girl really means a lot to you, and that kind of friendship is important. Having an open communication with her is just as important as your time together and hanging out. Try telling her how you feel and that you were jealous when she started talking with those other guys. By admitting your jealousy, it would really help her to understand where you were coming from with your feelings. Maybe try explaining to her that you worry that she acts differently towards other guys and you don't mean to but you become jealous when she's around them.

If this girl is your best friend, she shouldn't care about how sensitive or emotional you are. She obviously enjoys hanging out with you a great deal, and she likes you for who you are. Being someone else and trying to hide your feelings wont do anything to help your friendship. Being as open and able to communicate as you are is really the key thing. She obviously isn't looking for some 'manly' guy to be friends with, she is looking to be friends with you.

I hope that everything goes well for you. Try not to let this get you down.

Nat.


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Re: My friend is mad at me. - July 24th 2009, 05:48 AM

She finally returned my call, but she was at another friends house and had me on speaker phone. I asked her to hang out and she said she had other plans. That sucked haha.

My friend, her other best friend (a girl) and my friend (a guy) are all going to hang out on saturday, but for some reason I don't feel comfortable going. I wanted to get a chance to talk to her before it happened, but it doesn't look like thats possible. I feel like the longer we wait to talk the worse it becomes, but she wont let me talk to her. Having her mad at me is like having the sun eclipsed, and she wont let me tell her how much she means to me.
   
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