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Friends and Family Everyone has disagreements, even best friends and family. If you need advice about a relationship, ask us here.

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Do you find it easier? - August 24th 2009, 10:47 PM

To tell your friends and family all your secrets and problems or do you find it easier telling people you don't know as well (e.g people on here)

I personally find I open up more in general to people online (I won't tell them anything too personal or anything that they could use to steal my identity) Although there are a few people I'm close to that I can tell things too like my boyfriend and I can tell my mum certain things.


   
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Re: Do you find it easier? - August 24th 2009, 10:55 PM

Definately people on here. I can't tell my family anything. If I did they'd just panic and think I was going into a relapse again, or would just totally freak out and possibly hate what i've done or thought. Even though i'm quite close to my mum, I can't talk to her about problems that i'm having, it just doesnt work, she doesn't understand anything that i've been going through at all and she knows it. Other family members are just as hard to talk to, but occasionally i'll open up to my uncle's wife as she's really understanding and we get on well.

Talking online to people feels completely different. It's just like my problem is out there, and I don't have to face it all the time from the people I live with. I come on here/msn/whatever I use to communicate to people with and get support, or even just a chat about things to keep my mind clear. I couldn't do that with family, and I certainly don't have many friends to talk to.





   
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Re: Do you find it easier? - August 24th 2009, 11:02 PM

Normally, talking to people I don't know in real life is easier. Just because you know they are mostly incapable of telling anyone who would really care. There is one friend I have who I can tell anything too. Other then that I'm a fairly secretive person in real life.
   
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Re: Do you find it easier? - August 24th 2009, 11:51 PM

Strangers, definitely. In the time that I've been here I've found it so easy to talk openly about my self-harm, my insecurities, and before I'd come out as bi, my sexual confusion. I also found it much easier in the past to be open about things with my therapist that I couldn't be open about with my friends.


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Re: Do you find it easier? - August 25th 2009, 12:16 AM

it is definitely alot easier to tell a stranger or someone on here. when you tell someone you are close to they can judge and even possible cut off talking to you, which can hurt alot. but when you tell someone one here it is so easy and if they dont like you for it or judge you, so what? also there are usually alot of people on here with the same problems/secrets/issues and it is alot easier to talk to someone who can relate!!
   
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Re: Do you find it easier? - August 25th 2009, 12:42 AM

Telling the internet's the easiest way to go. It's there for all to see and it remains anonymous. I sometimes wonder if my friends perhaps -happened- across the site and read -my thoughts- and thought -this guy's got issues, wow-. Would be strange.
   
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Re: Do you find it easier? - August 25th 2009, 12:56 AM

definitely my frriends. i don't tell much to people online actually, i usually feel like i'm burdening them with all my problems if i do. i do talk to my family about problems and stuff, but only when its like a trivial problem.. like a an argument with a friend or something family related obviously.


..and our dreams will break the boundaries of our fears..



   
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Re: Do you find it easier? - August 25th 2009, 09:13 PM

I only have one possibly two friends in which i do sometimes confide in; but it's really difficult for me to tell them everything as i feel as though i would be judged. It's part of my paranoia and insecurities that prevent me from confiding in them totally.

As for my family - well; my family have enough problems of their own and even when i do tell them some stuff to do with my health, they brush it off and don't really seem like they care so naturally i don't feel as though i can turn to them.

It's much easier for me to spill my guts out anonymously to people online - i feel as though there is a barrier preventing me from being judged and it feels so safe, and comforting.


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Re: Do you find it easier? - August 25th 2009, 09:25 PM

i find it easier to talk to people online too, even family and friends. it gives me a chance to have a real conversation with someone and not feel like i could be judged by facial expressions or the tone in my voice when i say things. but talking person to person or on the phone is important too because those communicatoin skills are SO important for life itself. good luck! =]
   
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Re: Do you find it easier? - August 25th 2009, 09:46 PM

I gave up trying to talk to my parents, so occasionally I tell my grandparents and aunt what I'm feeling. But if there's anything I wanted to say, I've said it on here. I feel safe talking to strangers, because they're not going to tell my friends/family what I've said. They're exactly what they are: strangers.
   
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Re: Do you find it easier? - August 25th 2009, 10:20 PM

Depends on the problem. Some I feel comfortable to talk to my family and friends about whereas others I'd rather ask/talk to people online about as I feel more comfortable doing that instead of talking to family/friends about it. Especially as some things are best kept secret from family/friends.
   
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Re: Do you find it easier? - August 25th 2009, 11:03 PM

Hey,

I definately find it easier to speak to people here because a lot of people here can relate to you because different people here have so much personal experience, it's easy to find someone who has been through a similar experience to you. Really and truly people on teenhelp know more about me personally and what goes on in this head of mine than friends and family do- I'm pretty much a totally different person to what they think I am because they see the happy side of me and yet here I can be happy, sad and express myself in whatever way I need to and people are still going to see me the same and they aren't going to judge me for it.
   
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Re: Do you find it easier? - August 26th 2009, 07:41 PM

I'll start off by saying that this is an awesome question
I think it really depends on the problem. Me and my mum talk about a lot of things, but sometimes it's good to be able to talk to friends about what is going on. Sometimes it can be easier to type out a problem online, and others it's just more comfortable to say out loud.
But it also comes down to the fact that some things just are not easy to say, no matter what method you go about saying them in.


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Re: Do you find it easier? - September 2nd 2009, 04:00 PM

Definately people on here. I'm an active member on another forum (and have really good online friends there) and I sometimes feel weird asking for advice on certain things there too /: I think it's because I've known them for too long.

I'm not a very open person. Honestly, I try my hardest to put on different personas in front of people in real life.


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