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Friends and Family Everyone has disagreements, even best friends and family. If you need advice about a relationship, ask us here.

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Sean Offline
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Name: Sean
Age: 27
Gender: Male
Location: Massachusetts

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Join Date: January 14th 2009

In an awkward position. - January 24th 2009, 08:40 PM

I don't really know if this belong in here or Relationships and Dating, so I'll put it here and see what happens.

Anyway, my girlfriend and I have been together for three months.
Today we were at her house, in her bedroom. We're allowed up there as long as the door is open and the lights are on. We watched a movie and then we started making out.
It got dark outside and we hadn't turned the lights on. Her mom came up.
She walked in on us while I was on top of my girlfriend, arced over her and we were looking at each other at that point. We were pretty turned on, but I don't think her mom knew that.
Anyway, her mom walked in and I kinda fell off to the side in the most casual manner I could and just looked at her mom. Her mom said something kinda dumb, maybe something like, "Movie's over?", pulled her head out of the room for a second, put her head back in and said, "I think you two should come downstairs."
She didn't talk to us about it but she kept giving my girlfriend weird looks. We eventually just left and went to my house and hung out with my parents to get out of the awful atmosphere.

I took her home and we decided that she would tell her mom the truth, that we were making out. My girlfriend will explain that we haven't really made out much before (which isn't true, but we have to make it good) and that we like privacy for it and that I was only arced over her because it was the most comfortable way for both of us to have access to each others mouths. Hopefully that would pacify her mom enough. Her mom hasn't brought it up yet. But the truth was that we were gearing up to go a bit farther tomorrow, more second base thrown in and we were very horny. We decided we wouldn't tell her mom that.

My question is how should I act about it and how should my girlfriend deal with it when her mom brings it up? We're pretty sure she won't tell her dad because he would freak out. Her mom has caught us in similar positions and her mom just said to my girlfriend, alone, that she "shouldn't take advantage of her letting us spend time in her room" and never mentioned it to her father.

Thanks for the help,
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Strider Offline
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Name: Nat
Age: 27
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Join Date: January 19th 2009

Re: In an awkward position. - January 25th 2009, 12:00 PM

Hi there Sean,

I think that this could go either in Relationships and Dating or Friends and Family because it deals with both your girlfriend and her mom. I'll keep it here though because it's more with how she should talk to her mom.

First of all, I think you should respect the rules your girlfriend's mom has made about you in her room and you should probably not go any farther than kissing while there, especially since her mom is likely to walk in. I wouldn't suggest telling her mom how far you two were planning to go, but I think you should use your judgment on when and where that is appropriate and that you are always being safe about everything.

You should act normally around her mom and respect her and what she says. She just wants the best for her daughter after all. She's already giving you guys a lot of leeway.

Your girlfriend should just tell her mom the truth- that you were just kissing and nothing more. You were not planning on going farther when her mom walked in, so I think it's better to be honest about it. Your girlfriend should probably explain to her mom that you two were just kissing and you would rather keep it to yourselves. Her mom probably will not bring it up with your girlfriend's father, but I think if she catches you two taking it farther she will.

Just be careful and respect the rules set by her mom. It's better to be on good terms with your girlfriend's parents.

All the best to you.

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