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WhySoSerious? Offline
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Name: Vicki
Gender: Female
Location: Saskatoon

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Join Date: January 7th 2009

Need to get him out! - January 25th 2009, 07:18 PM

So, my mum has this guy living with us... technically her husband (as they did get married once upon a time, then separated and hardly spoke for 8 years) and he's my brother's dad. But, the man is a total loser, he's completely useless, he does odd jobs at various trucking places but doesn't use the money for anything other than to buy himself sweets it seems.

He doesn't help out around the house, he cooks occasionally when he is hungry and then eats all of our fucking food, doesn't leave anything for us, and never buys groceries. He's a disgusting leech, he makes a mess, never picks up, sucks our funds dry to the bone and treats everyone like shit. I'm not saying he doesn't have his moments, but the overall truth is, we'd be better off without his lazy ass.

He needs to get out of here, we live on pretty low income as it is, my mum supporting two kids, but he's making things a whole lot worse. I need to tell my mother politely about the reality of it (which she is probably aware of herself) but I'm not sure how? I know she thinks she's doing my brother a favour by giving him a "father figure" and all that, and my councilor explained that she feels guilty that I couldn't have the same thing and all, but he's teaching my brother to be a chauvinist and a rude obnoxious loser. My brother is a good kid and he doesn't mind helping out, I don't want to see that change because his father is a bad influence.

Any suggestions on what to say...? How to say it without seeming rude?

(sorry for the long post)

~Where death is I am not, where I am death is not, so we never meet~

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than live forever.
We will all die so gloriously, that having ever lived will seem like folly.

Last edited by WhySoSerious?; January 25th 2009 at 10:45 PM.
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Strider Offline
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Age: 27
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Join Date: January 19th 2009

Re: Need to get him out! - January 25th 2009, 07:38 PM

Hi there Vicki,

Don't worry about long posts! I find it helps explain the situation better sometimes.

It does sound difficult living with this man, especially when he is not contributing to the family. I think that what you need to tell your mum is that you're worried that this man's actions are negatively affecting your financial situation and your home. Let her know that the way he's acting isn't helping you or your brother and he should either get a job and help out around the place or find his own place to live.

Your mum may try to brush this off, but be persistent. You wont need to say anything rudely, but make sure your thoughts are clear and that what you are saying is accurate. If this man is not helping out and only taking things from your family then he should not be allowed to stay with you. Just tell your mom the truth- that this man is only making and going to make life worse for all of you and that he needs to shape up or leave.

This can be difficult to say, but just try and be confident. It sounds like you've given this a lot of thought. Just say what you think about it.

I hope this goes well.

The great artists of our time are the ones who created something timeless. But it was never them defining it that way.
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