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Friends and Family Everyone has disagreements, even best friends and family. If you need advice about a relationship, ask us here.

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cassie.x Offline
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Friend issues.. - November 16th 2009, 03:16 PM


I'm having some major issues with my best friend;
And she doesn't even know it.

Now the problem is, she hardly treats me like a friend.
Now i'm pretty busy, and i know she is too, so i'm not suggesting i want her to be with me all the time, and drop everything for me.
But a lil' effort would be nice.

I haven't seen her, or heard from her since Halloween. I think that's a while, I mean, i have friends i dont see very regularuarly, longer than that, but we keep in touch, they call me if there upset,we make arrangements to meet up soon, we IM whenever we can, to keep friends.

But this other friend doesn't, if i sent her a text just saying hey i never get a reply, And on halloween, i had to go out with all her friends who i don't know much, but i made the effort to be her friend.

I haven't tried to make arrangments to see her in ages now, since i know there is no point, she ignores my calls and texts. I only see her when it's her idea, and even then, she'll text me saying it'll need to be another time since she's busy. (I dont mind that, but everytime?)

example- we were meant to be going out for something to eat, i come home, shower, get ready and i text her twice, asking if 7 is still ok time-wise and to see what outfit she's choosing, nothing, i feel a bit silly for getting ready, i call her house and she picks up, saying she cba going out...Was she even gonna tell me this?
I'd be left in a resturant myself... Idunno.

She has a group of friends i don't get on with much, whenever we are out together, i try be as nice as possibile to them.
But whenever i do see her, she bitches about them constastly, but then the next day she's out at parties with them and stuff.

She's been my best friend for years, i don't wanna loose her
Iv'e tried contacting her so we can talk about it, but nothing.

Can anyone help? Am i in the wrong, or missing something?

idk what to do =[ xx






   
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Re: Friend issues.. - November 19th 2009, 01:29 AM

I think that she is just taking you for granted. If you already tried to talk to her and she just doesn't want to, then give it some time and go on with your life, when she realizes she is loosing you, she will come around.
   
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Re: Friend issues.. - November 19th 2009, 08:48 PM

Hi Danni,

I think for a lot of people - friendships can go awry and there comes a certain time where there is no longer that strong connection between you both. It's because you're changing and drifting away; which can sometimes be hard - but it's something that you should try to deal with as calmly as possible because once someone changes; it's very difficult for things to go back to how they were so dwelling or stressing over this doesn't really do much for anyone.

I'm not saying you should cut contact with her; all i'm saying is that you should try to stop making as much effort as you have been lately - especially when all she seems to be doing is throwing it back in your face. You don't need that, it's not something we should have to take off of people. Just make it known to her that if she feels like doing something with you, you will always be there but expect it to be on your terms as well as hers - i.e: cancelling at the last minute has to be for a VERY good reason, otherwise she should stick to her word.

Also, you should always remember that although you two may not be the very best of friends at the moment - you should always hold her close to your heart as she has shaped your life in one way or another and at those very special times, she made your life what it is today and that despite everything you should cherish those memories.

Take care!


& it's just like she's in another world.
[<3]


   
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