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Birthmom??? - November 24th 2009, 02:28 AM

So in the US, there's a law that says that in the event of a closed adoption, a child and their biological mother cannot meet until the child is 18, and only then if the mother so chooses to be reunited with said child. I was adopted through a closed adoption, and it's driving me crazy waiting until I'm 18 to meet the woman who gave birth to me. I'm almost 17, and the closer to 18 I get, the harder the wait is. Does anyone know a legal way around that law???


“I can only hope that they’ll turn that anger and frustration and madness into something positive, so that two, three, four, five hundred will step forward, so the gay doctors will come out, the gay lawyers, the gay judges, gay bankers, gay architects … I hope that every professional gay will say ‘enough’, come forward and tell everybody, wear a sign, let the world know. Maybe that will help.” Harvey Milk, 1978

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Re: Birthmom??? - December 3rd 2009, 03:26 AM

Just be patient, my dad alwasy says the suspense is better.
   
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Re: Birthmom??? - December 3rd 2009, 03:55 AM

i had a friend who put her child up for adoption and he is aloud to find her when hes 16 if he chooses but i dont know if that was a different kind of adoption or what not sorry if im no help


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Re: Birthmom??? - December 3rd 2009, 07:07 PM

Why don't you do some research about that law and the adoption and see if there is a way around it.
   
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Re: Birthmom??? - December 5th 2009, 12:03 AM

I do not believe there is a way around it, however I advise you to be carefull, and not to get your hopes too high. I don't mean to sound so negative, but what if something happened? Like what if she had passed away already? Or maybe she doesn't want you in her life? Just keep these things in your mind...I've seen everything I mentioned happen.
As a side note, I'm 16, and when I turn 18, I am going to opt not to seek my biological parents. I know how you feel.

Best of luck.


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Re: Birthmom??? - December 9th 2009, 12:33 AM

Yeah. I've considered all that, but I at least wanna know my medical history and such. I think it's totally lame that I can't know.


“I can only hope that they’ll turn that anger and frustration and madness into something positive, so that two, three, four, five hundred will step forward, so the gay doctors will come out, the gay lawyers, the gay judges, gay bankers, gay architects … I hope that every professional gay will say ‘enough’, come forward and tell everybody, wear a sign, let the world know. Maybe that will help.” Harvey Milk, 1978

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Re: Birthmom??? - December 10th 2009, 04:52 PM

I'm also an orphan, searching for my roots, it's especially useful when a doctor or therapist asks you "what was your family history?" - kind of hard to explain, but when they ask that it kind of makes me feel like a second-hand citizen, it is a minority group.
   
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Re: Birthmom??? - December 10th 2009, 04:54 PM

They wouldn't let you know your medical history? I was allowed to know that.


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Re: Birthmom??? - December 10th 2009, 04:56 PM

I don't know how it works within the states, but foreign adoption - I may have well come crashing down to earth from the stars with no idea about anything other than alien status.
   
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Re: Birthmom??? - December 12th 2009, 02:22 AM

It seems that for this, patience is key. Just wait till your 18. If there is no law around it, just wait though it is becoming hard. But as I love : ) said, don't get your hopes too high. Just be patient and don't get your hopes too high.
   
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