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rriot132 Offline
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my dad - March 29th 2010, 12:36 PM

i have this fear. i hate it when people look at me. i just hate it. i think its like a phobia. i dont know. but the thing is whenever my dad looks i tell him not to and i dont like it but he thinks that i dont like him and im un-lovable. but its not true! and its driving me insane. its just i dont like anybody looking at me. whether its my family, friends, strangers etc. but he just dosnt get it. i tell him its not just him and that its every1. tonight he got mad about it and now he isnt talking to me and he wont let me watch tv. dammit i just hate this stupid fear.
pleasee help me

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Re: my dad - March 29th 2010, 04:33 PM

Then go and tell him you love him and appreciate him, when you get a good opportunity. With your heart in it of course. And also the best solution to fear is its negative which is not to be afraid. Don't let it control you and don't be afraid.

I came here to help out, so if you wanna talk or just need someone to bounce ideas or issues off of or something else then send me a message and I will reply as soon as I can.
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Re: my dad - March 29th 2010, 10:09 PM

Hey there Meera.

Your fear truly isn't uncommon. Tons of people are afraid to be "in the spotlight." I think it woul dbe a good idea for you to try and sit down with your dad and explain this to him. Explain that it makes you feel umfortable. Do you think that people are thinking negative thoughts about you when they look at you? Or is it something else? Explain why it makes you uncomfortable. I understand how annoyed you must be that he is acting like this. It is pretty childish, honestly. I wish he would be more understanding. Unfortunately, it just means that you need to try and get him to understand.

Explain it the best way you can. Be calm. See how he reacts.
Good luck Meera. Take care. And by the way, its okay to be afraid. If you want to work on it, feel free to PM me and you and I can work on it.

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You gotta live it before itís too late
I canít turn that clock back around
On what youíre dreaming about
You better do it now, donít wait

Do something crazy and dumb, while your still young. <3

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Re: my dad - March 31st 2010, 11:59 PM

You're not alone... social phobias are more common than you might think. =) The good news is that there ARE treatment options for coping with, and perhaps even overcoming, phobias like yours. You may want to talk to your dad about meeting with a behavioral therapist (or getting a referral to one from your family doctor). You can tell your dad that you love him, and you can try to show him how much you appreciate him... but in the end, if you still can't interact "normally" with him, you're just covering up the problem... you're not finding a REAL solution for it. And what will happen the next time you face this kind of situation, with a friend or other loved one? Will you keep telling people to stop looking at you for the rest of your life?

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