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Friends and Family Everyone has disagreements, even best friends and family. If you need advice about a relationship, ask us here.

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savealife723 Offline
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Unhappy We're Drifting Apart. ): - March 30th 2010, 08:35 PM

My best friend and I have been drifting apart lately. A couple weeks ago we were the best friends that everyone wanted to be. He was always there for me, and I was always there for him. We should go to each other at any hour just to help the other one out. We could talk about anything with each other, and we knew every ounce of secrets, pain, and happiness in each other's lives.

Well now he has a girlfriend, and it's as if everyone just disappeared. I mean, come on? ): At first, I thought it was just that they were excited about being together, so I let it go for awhile. I mean, I love seeing him happy. But now it's been weeks, and they're still totally self-obsorbed.


I've tried talking to him, but it's just not the same. We only talk for a couple seconds until he starts to talk about her and how amazing she is. And when all three of us hang out, she won't even let him talk to me. She'll just cling to him and never let me talk or be close to them. /: I've tried talking to both of them, it's not workinggg. /:

I miss my best friend ):
I want him back.


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Re: We're Drifting Apart. ): - March 30th 2010, 08:46 PM

Remember you are a girl and his girlfriend will protect him as his. So it is clear that she is just,you know, marking her boundary/territory. Other than that i think you should just talk to him when you can.


I came here to help out, so if you wanna talk or just need someone to bounce ideas or issues off of or something else then send me a message and I will reply as soon as I can.
   
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Re: We're Drifting Apart. ): - April 1st 2010, 01:10 AM

Hey, Kayla. This actually happens quite often, when two people first start dating. They tend to neglect their family, friends, and social commitments, in order to be more accommodating to their new partner. Give it a few more weeks... I know it took me close to three months before I could find a healthy balance between family, friends, and my new boyfriend. If he still isn't willing to talk to you, hang out with you, etc. then you may need to be a bit more blunt with him (but DON'T attack his girlfriend... whatever you do, don't make her out to be the villain). Tell him what you told us: that you miss him, and want to spend more time with him.

As for his girlfriend... well, let's face it... you're his best friend, you're a girl, and you're attractive. =P SHE'S JEALOUS! Hopefully, once she gets to know you better, she'll loosen up a bit. Talking to her one-on-one (when the three of you are hanging out) may help ease her mind and allow her to see that you're not going to steal her boyfriend away, that you aren't competition, etc. Some girls, however, can never get over their insecurities, and they'll never feel truly comfortable around you. If that's the case, just try to be as polite to her as you can, whenever you do see her, and hope that your best friend isn't too easily controlled/manipulated by her insecure behavior.






   
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