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Friends and Family Everyone has disagreements, even best friends and family. If you need advice about a relationship, ask us here.

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Question 10 Years Down The Drain? - April 6th 2010, 02:00 AM

I have been friends with a guy for almost 10 years now. We were little when we met, so a relationship wasn't thought of much. We talked and hung out almost every day, he was the sweetest thing ever, but then I moved and I lost contact with him. I remembered his email and got in touch with him again a few years later and we started talking again, he was just the way I remembered him. Moved again, life got hectic, lost contact. Last year I found him on Facebook, and once again we were talking. I moved back to IL where this story starts, but he had moved to MN. We flirted an awful lot, and it seemed like the years hadn't put any type of wedge between us, everything seemed natural, it was as if we had only went a couple of weeks instead of years without talking.

He called me out of the blue and said he was going on a road trip to Ohio and wanted to stop in and see me on the way, I was fine with it. But... things happened that "just friends" don't do. This was a week ago. I haven't heard from him since, and I'm terrified to call him. Everything hurts so bad. I mean, we weren't in a relationship but all that time, when I would date somebody who turned out to be a real jerk I thought about Steve a lot and what dating him would be like, even through the years when we weren't talking.

I've never been hurt like this before. This is different, like a slap in the face.

What should I do? I'm so out of it and I can't stop thinking about him. I've thought about sending him a message on Facebook but I guess I'm too afraid of being rejected. I'd rather never speak to him again than read or hear him saying, "Sorry I'm just not interested."

I guess I just need help with how to deal with these feelings, how to talk to him. I'm totally clueless.
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Re: 10 Years Down The Drain? - April 6th 2010, 03:10 AM

I wud say send him a meseg u never know wut might hapin but be carfl becus u live in difring peases and he might cheet on u. Not saying he will but its posibl and I feel ur pain in wunting to talk to some one and woryed to heer somthing painfl but remember we r heer to help so pm me eny time and love to be frends
   
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Re: 10 Years Down The Drain? - April 6th 2010, 03:50 AM

It just doesn't help that he seemed to care about me. Like, he saw my old scars and asked where they came and I told him I used to be very depressed and such... he kissed my forehead and told me not to do things like that. I'm starting to think perhaps he is just busy... but I'm so anxious and worried.
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Re: 10 Years Down The Drain? - April 6th 2010, 12:07 PM

OP, I wouldn't get too worried about it because he may be on the road or things may be delayed and hectic at his end, so he may not want to bring the chaos to you, especially when he plans to go out of his way to see you briefly. Also, he may just have not taken a laptop or signed onto FaceBook while on the road to almost "rough it". I wouldn't work myself up over it.

[Edit: Removed by Moderator]

Last edited by Pandamonium; April 6th 2010 at 02:04 PM. Reason: Rude/unhelpful
   
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Re: 10 Years Down The Drain? - April 7th 2010, 02:48 AM

Send him the message if you haven't done so. Start out simple and just say a hi and then let the conversation flow. But you have to try and talk with him. You cannot let fear make you not try something, especially this particular thing. So go and send him a message, I wouldn't do it through facebook though, try email, it seems much more private as this is a matter that is between the two of you. And don't worry also, be calm and give him time to respond.


I came here to help out, so if you wanna talk or just need someone to bounce ideas or issues off of or something else then send me a message and I will reply as soon as I can.

Last edited by Jacksonian; April 7th 2010 at 02:48 AM. Reason: addition
   
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Re: 10 Years Down The Drain? - April 7th 2010, 09:49 PM

Okay. So I sent a simple text this morning saying "Hello "

And I called this afternoon but no answer.

He hasn't been on facebook since he left. Now I'm worried something might have happened to him


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Re: 10 Years Down The Drain? - April 7th 2010, 10:19 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Pup View Post
Okay. So I sent a simple text this morning saying "Hello "

And I called this afternoon but no answer.

He hasn't been on facebook since he left. Now I'm worried something might have happened to him
Give him time. Be patient. And remember don't worry. If it goes a long time without any response then it will be cause for concern but now is not yet that time, so give him some time and keep sending him simple messages, not too much or too many. But be calm.


I came here to help out, so if you wanna talk or just need someone to bounce ideas or issues off of or something else then send me a message and I will reply as soon as I can.
   
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Re: 10 Years Down The Drain? - April 7th 2010, 10:52 PM


Oh thanks sooo much you guys!
He finally texted me, I'm so happy!

Thanks for helping me out the past few days
And thanks so much for giving me the courage to finally try and contact him myself!

You guys are great!


if rain brings winds of change
then let it rain on us forever


Last edited by Pup; April 7th 2010 at 11:51 PM.
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Re: 10 Years Down The Drain? - April 8th 2010, 04:42 AM

Yaaaaaaaaay! I'm so glad that things worked out for you. =)

I'm going to go ahead and close this thread... but feel free to post again, about this or any other issue!





   
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