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Friends and Family Everyone has disagreements, even best friends and family. If you need advice about a relationship, ask us here.

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  (#1 (permalink)) Old
LavenderErin Offline
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Angry I dont want to be a parent anymore. - May 30th 2010, 07:51 PM

Im 9 years older than my sister. My mother spends little to no time with her, and the times she does spend time with her its just because shes taking her to her flute lessons or whatever. Im so effing sick and tired of being my sisters parent. When she was a baby, I had to watch her while my mom was at work...and I was like 11 years old...I had to feed her change her and everything, I had to be in charge of carrying all the groceries, I had to go up and down the stairs in the train stations carrying her stroller because my mother "couldnt" because she was too busy on her damn phone. My mother got to go out on dates, hang out with her friends till 2 o clock in the morning while Im panicking because if something happened to her while she was out Im SCREWED.

My sister didnt learn how to read until she was 9 years old....and thats my fault. My sister doesnt do her homework..because every time I dont have the time to sit down and do homework much less do my OWN homework....

still...like 8 years later my mother says "Help your sister study for her test"...
I dont want to because the last time I did that she failed, because I couldnt study hard enough with her, and she isnt diciplined because nobody diciplines her...and every time I tried to discipline I was YELLED at because shes the "baby"
Im just too tired. Im so effing tired of being a parent!

Am I just having a tantrum because my mom needs help with my sister? or am I right...

Because my mother is home watching TV why the hell cant she study with her daughter. Why me? She says I have to because Im not doing anything Im just sitting on my a$$ but...you know what IM TIRED OF BEING RESPONSIBLE FOR HER AND I DONT GIVE A CRAP ANYMORE. I SHOULDNT BE LOSING HAIR FROM STRESS OVER A CHILD I DIDNT EFFING CONCIEVE
   
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MermaidMassacre Offline
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Re: I dont want to be a parent anymore. - May 30th 2010, 08:22 PM

I've heard of people calling child services for that. But you're right you shouldn't be your siblings parents. My boyfriend had his sisters raise him, and it was hard on them. You need to tell your mom that it's her job not yours.
I mean sure, help out a little, get your sister some food, help her study a little, like a sister would do. Everything else have your mom do.
Refuse to help her do all her homework. Tell your mom it's her job.
You can be strict with you mom, you should be out having your own life, not at home with your sister who might as well be your child.
Again, it's your mom's job, not yours. So you have to explain this to her.
I hope all goes well!


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Kristy Offline
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Re: I dont want to be a parent anymore. - May 30th 2010, 11:48 PM

If your mother was actually busy doing something productive, then I can see why she'd need your help. BUT, she's not. She needs to know her place. If she doesn't listen to you, you need to get another party involved. Know any adults you can get help from? Tell them your situation. Even counselors.
   
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Jacksonian Offline
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Re: I dont want to be a parent anymore. - June 2nd 2010, 12:22 AM

Then be a big sister, be you not the parent. I can understand why you act as one but just be you, a big sister not a mother. Be a role model, live your life and be there for your sister and help her out. When it comes to such situations and others close to this, the line becomes thin, but it still can be seen and crossed, so cross over and be a big sister.


I came here to help out, so if you wanna talk or just need someone to bounce ideas or issues off of or something else then send me a message and I will reply as soon as I can.
   
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Re: I dont want to be a parent anymore. - June 11th 2010, 05:01 PM

I'm so sorry you're going through this. Maybe you (or she) could stay with a relative for a while. You need to get a break. Your sister also need guidance. Best wishes, Ocean
   
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