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Friends and Family Everyone has disagreements, even best friends and family. If you need advice about a relationship, ask us here.

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Question trouble in paradise - May 31st 2010, 02:00 PM

I can't stand being home. I hate it. I have an older sister and a younger sister, with me stuck in the middle. Not only do my sister act alive, bt they are practically identical too. With my younger sister as a freshman this year and me a junior, it was probably the worst experieance of my life. She dated my now ex best guy friend and she hooked up with everyone in my grade. I try to tell my parents that I am unhappy but she is thier princess and nothing has been done. There hasn't been a day in the last year were we have fought. Ontop of all this, I have been bullimic for 10 months and she is the only one in my family who doesn't know. I'm at a loss with this because I feel like I have no one and no support in anything otherthan sports in my family. Please, help
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Re: trouble in paradise - June 1st 2010, 04:59 AM

Hey there! I'm sorry you're having a hard time with your sister at the moment. =( I don't have any siblings, but I can imagine what it must feel like to constantly argue with someone who lives under the same roof as you.

Why doesn't your sister know about your bulimia? It seems strange that your parents know about your eating disorder, but haven't bothered to fill your sister in. Have they sought counseling for you? This is something that is hard to fight on your own, and you really do need support from as many people as possible. Perhaps it would be a good idea to sit down with ALL of your family members, and to discuss possible treatment options (ex. seeing a family doctor or a psychological professional who specializes in eating disorders). That way, you are all on the same page, and you can begin to get the help you deserve.

As for arguing with your sister, all I can really suggest is that you try to think about what leads up to your arguments, and how they can be avoided. Maybe she can be reasoned with, and all you have to do is remain calm, asking her how the two of you can resolve a problem. Perhaps she's the type of person who won't listen, and it would be best if you could physically remove yourself from the hostile situation (ex. purchasing a lock for your room, or leaving the house for a few minutes). Unfortunately, parents won't always step in and stop an argument, because ALL siblings argue. They probably see it as natural, and aren't taking the situation seriously... so I'm afraid it's up to you to "be the better person" and avoid confrontation/resolve problems.

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Re: trouble in paradise - June 1st 2010, 11:19 PM

Well, not much can be said except to tell you to live your life. And I also ask, why is it a problem that your sister hooked up with these guys ( Just asking, i hope it doesn't read out as if I am rude ) ? What / why exactly does it bother you, is it that its her or that she is in your friend circle where you prefer it to be just you with your friends ?

I came here to help out, so if you wanna talk or just need someone to bounce ideas or issues off of or something else then send me a message and I will reply as soon as I can.
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Re: trouble in paradise - June 3rd 2010, 10:03 AM

we all need our 'private' circle..........and sometimes it stinks to have a family member (or a friend) all over every part of life, because we just get sick of seeing the same thing every where we head......... if I was ni your position I would actually engage my sister in those activities (I know, does not seem that much of a solution) but trust me , once YOU engage her and ask her to introduce you to her friends from her class in order to know them, Remember when you were freshman your self, were not u intimidated by the new atmosphere and every thing? she probably is and having you there gives her security as she knows that you got her back, and that if she connected to those you know they can not hurt/annoy her.
For u, I bet ur sister looks at to u, otherwise she would just avoid any thing related to u instead of getting involved in your -in her eyes- amazing life.
encourage her to get more friends of her age, help her do that. and in the same time find thing that you enjoy doing, do not loose a good friend for this reason, and get more friends........ join more activities, may be something ur damn good doing........digg well i am sure u'll find something that makes u feel good about ur self
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