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Friends and Family Everyone has disagreements, even best friends and family. If you need advice about a relationship, ask us here.

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lonelyboy123 Offline
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I hate my mom - June 4th 2010, 05:59 AM

I hate my mom. but its not her thats the problem. its me.
she's always doing things that annoy me, like acting stupid and not knowing anything and i keep telling her to stop but she keeps on doing it, i mean its not a big deal but i just get angry all of a sudden and want to start shouting. She's always getting into my business wanting to know what im doing and what im gonna do. I just sort of tell her to fuck off.
she always telling me how important taking extra math, english, chinese classes are important and hits me whenever she finds out i haven't been doing my homework. i get angry and fight back and i just want to kill her like stab her over and over again. but its my fault because i have a F in chinese school, a D in algebra 1 academy, and arent studying english vocab at all. not to be racist but im asian so i know parents push their kids. so now im always thinking its her fault that i ended up fucking up extra classes like this cuz she didn't be strict with me when i was young and now she all crazy hittign me for something her fault. I mean i have good grades in regular school and yeah.
but i kno its my fault one way or another, but i just want her to die everyday. is it because of puberty or is it cuz im just fucked up in the head like that? am i thinking too hard, am i just psycho or soemthing? srry if you dont understand what im writing im really frustrated right now
   
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Re: I hate my mom - June 4th 2010, 07:15 AM

School sucks. Big time. Got academic suspension once and never felt worse. I worked hard though, applied myself and got ahead. Now I know you're going to hate this, hell - I would have hated hearing this when I was your age... but your parents are right: school is very important. Especially for my generation and those following because of a difficult job market you could (hopefully won't) be entering into nine years (goes by fast) years from now. Thus, good grades equals a good college equals a good life. It sucks - if it was up to me, school wouldn't exist - but we need it for some reason. That said, what your Mom is doing is wrong... she should never physically abuse you for any reason let alone just for academics.

Never felt like killing my parents - I have felt like killing my father though, for entirely different reason (might be a biological thing). But, I have felt like punching my parents at times or attacking them - the key thing though, the key difference is I hold myself back. Thus, it's very common to feel so angry that you could punch something, that you could punch a hole through the wall. Just, try not to let all your anger out by actually attacking them. I found video games to be a great outlet, or hell, sometimes blasting angry music or punching things. It's part puberty, probably part just being a guy. Anger's normal as long as you don't let anger take control over you (hope that makes sense).

Basically:
1) School's important
2) You have a reason to be angry, while your Mom wants you to be successful - she shouldn't resort to physical abuse
3) Anger is normal, especially for guys, the key is not letting the anger take over.


"Maybe I just like people. Maybe sexuality isn't one thing or the other. Maybe it's just something that's shifting and moving. I just know I'm not thinking man or woman."
- SHAMELESS.
   
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Re: I hate my mom - June 4th 2010, 04:49 PM

hahahaaa, welcome to being a teenager. I used to feel that way about my parents and it took me years to stop being angry. It's actually partially caused by a chemical in the brain- in adults, this chemical calms them down when they become annoyed. In teenagers, the effect is reversed and they become angrier and angrier, to the point where it's completely out of proportion to a reasonable response. So, yes you are completely normal in terms of your violent thoughts towards your parents. Of course, I doubt you'd actually want to act on those thoughts!!

That said, you need to pratice exercises that will help you calm down a little when you talk to your parents. I'm not talking anger management classes, just little things like making sure your favourite song is playing in the background (that helped me). You know deep down that your mum is right about needing classes and that homework is important. So, to sum up my answer: yes, you are perfectly normal but you still need to be aware of what's important and perhaps learn to deal with your frustration. Hope this helps
   
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Re: I hate my mom - June 6th 2010, 12:45 AM

I think you need to find a way to vent your emotions like your angery out of you. Don't let it take over. & yea welcome to pubety. Try not to let your mom get to you. She's just doing what she thinks is best for you, thouhg violnce is not the answer. School is really impornt thouhg. Your grades really do matter. Sorry about the whole asien strotype And with your mom being all in your buisnes , thats what alot of Parents do, not just yours, which your going to have to deal with untill your 18 or move out.

Have you tried talking to your mom about how your feeling with her?
   
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