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Exclamation Tired of being lectured on how I need to try harder with my brother(SORRY ITS KINDA LONG) - July 14th 2010, 12:28 AM

This thread has been labeled as triggering, particularly on the subject of rape or abuse, by the original poster or by a Moderator. The contents of this thread might therefore not be suitable for certain sensitive users. Please take this into consideration before continuing to read.

So a while back my brother(his name is nick) and I's relationship went downhill and was permanently damaged, Ever since this day that it was damaged my brother is constantl treating me like crap, I am afraid to be alone at home with him, There have been times where I have been so afraid that i cried, one time i almost called the cops. Things get worse a few months ago, see hereís the thing, before I tell you what happened I need to explain that I am short tempered, and I am in constant pain from a genetic disorder called Neurofibromatosis it causes noncancerous tumors to grow on the nerves and under the skin(NF for short and yes nick knows about my disorder) Okay so one morning I was downstairs making myself some breakfast nick was downstairs petting our dog penny, I was not aware he was watching TV because first off he wasnít, he was focused on the dog with his back turned, he was going off to school for the day soon but I figured it would be okay to change the channel, so I changed the channel and nick says in a rude threatening immature shrill like voice "EXCUSE ME BUT I WAS WATCHING THAT" and I say in an annoyed voice "No you were not you were petting the dog" he says in a threatening voice, "CHANGE THE CHANNEL BACK NOW" by this point nick is still NOT looking at the TV, and I respond "NO I'm watching this your petting the dog" and nick goes "CHANGE THE CHANNEL BACK YOU JERK" and I finally say "NO CHANGE IT BACK YOURSELF I AM NOT YOUR MAID" I throw the controller down on the table and nick is always bossing me around telling me to do things for him and when I donít or I say something to him in a short tired tone(I am usually cranky from lack of sleep not to mention the pain medicine I take makes me angry and its very hard for me to control my anger and my emotions) nick will call me a jerk, so then nick says "why are you such a jerk?" and I say "I'm not a jerk" he says "Sometimes I wish I could hit you" and I say in a sarcastic tone OOOO Iím so scared(because I didnít think he was actually being serious) he responds with "Well you should be" now when those words came out of his mouth I got scared, and I respond with "Mom and dad said your not allowed to hit me if you do you'll get in big trouble" now nick isnít allowed to hit me because if he hit one of my tumors not only would it aggravate the tumor possibly causing it to grow but if he hit me on one of my tumors it would cause me excruciating pain. and nick responds with "I donít care" and then he said something I will never forget that has scarred my heart permanently, thereís a wound on my heart that will never heal, nick said to be "You deserve to be in pain for being such a jerk" and then there was another incident a month ago, nick was being rude and was blasting his bass now I have a tumor in my left ear thatís pressing on my eardrum and when nicks bass is up loud the vibrations cause me a great deal of pain, so I ask nick to turn it down three times, I close my door which slams because of the fan in my window, nick nearly breaks my door down, and he blasted his bass for over 2 hours, I was in so much pain my chest and both ears were hurting, it was so bad I was dizzy and nauseous. now in the state of Washington texting and driving is against the law, I was repeatedly texting my dad begging for help and asking when he would be home, when he got home he came into my room and starts yelling at me saying he cant answer his phone and that he is tired of my complaining and all my crap and that I need to be nice to nick and be more mature, and that he's tired of me and that he wants a life too(in other words because of me he has no life) what my parents donít see is that I try SO HARD to be nice to nick and I usually am unless he's mean to me. whenever I ask him to turn his bass down I will say "Nick can you please turn the bass down" he will respond with "NOPE" and I will say "But nick its hurting my ear, please turn it down" he will respond with "TOO BAD" so no matter how hard I try nick always acts immature, usually this is when my parents arenít around, sometimes I lose it when nick is teasing me, so then I get yelled at for being upset over him teasing me, how can I get my parents to see that I try really hard to be nice to nick and try extra hard to respect him but thatís its nearly impossible to do that when nick doesnít even respect me


I was born with a genetic disorder called neurofibromatosis, it causes tumors to grow in my body on nerves,my spine,and under my skin. I have a tumor in the thalamus region of my brain. I also have heartburn,hypothyroidism and secondary adrenal insufficiency these are under control with medication.
I also have hip dysplasia and scoliosis.




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Re: Tired of being lectured on how I need to try harder with my brother(SORRY ITS KINDA LONG) - July 14th 2010, 11:48 AM

Hii Sorry to hear about all this.

Something you could try is to just sit down with your brother and talk to him about it all. No offense to guys but they mature slower than girls, and he probably doesn't mean to hurt you as much as he is. People say a lot of things that they don't mean.

So try sitting down with him and talk to him about it, and if he starts to yell at you or raise his voice, just keep yourself at a normal speaking voice and don't yell back. All he wants is a reaction, so don't give him one. Just stay calm with him, but if he starts getting really bad with what he says then walk away and go to your room, or go outside for a bit until you feel a bit better.

You shouldn't be expected to take all that, so if he complains at you after saying that you walked away or whatever, ignore it. It will certainly show that you are more responsible and mature enough to walk away from the situation, than to give a response and maybe make it worse.

I hope this helped a bit. Feel free to PM me anytime.
Take care <3
   
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