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Friends and Family Everyone has disagreements, even best friends and family. If you need advice about a relationship, ask us here.

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taylalatbh. Offline
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Name: Taylala
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Why don't I have good friends? - August 2nd 2010, 02:28 PM

It's really starting to annoy me now. I just really don't have any friends. It's really depressing. No one seems to want to talk to me regularly, like they would with their other friends.

It seems like I have a lot of accomplices, but no good friends. I did have one, for a good two years, but due to her getting a boyfriend and fucking off, she doesn't speak to me any more. But since then, I just haven't made any new good friends. Yeah, I've met a lot of people, but no one seems to want to talk to me a lot, and for me to be come one of their proper friends.

I do try, probably not hard enough, but I do try. But I've kind of given up hope. But I don't know how to go on any more. Life is so lonely and depressing when you've got no one to spend time with.

I have a boyfriend, but in a way he's just like me. He has a group of really good friends since school, but since about a year and a half ago, they've drifted. Which I think is sub-conciously due to myself, but not really. He's chosen to spend more time with me, and not with them. So that's not really my fault, is it?

It's just bugging me because I have like, loads of people on facebook, and very rarely anyone speaks to me. And if I ever go out with 'friends', it's because I've made the arrangements. The thing that bothers me though, is that when we're out, we have a really good time, but then we go home and I don't hear anything from them until I ask them to go out again. And that's just what I don't understand. I always have to make the plans, we appear to have a really good time when we're out. But then there's just hardly any contact after.

It just makes me think whether they don't actually like me. Or that there's just something wrong with me. Because I don't think that I'm a horrible person. But I just don't understand what's going on.

I just can't make any new friends either. It's so difficult when you're 19, and unconfident. And everyone I see that is my age, already has a big bunch of friends. And are not welcoming anyone new. I just don't know how to go about fixing up my life.

I suppose I think I'm looking for advice, but I think I'm beyond help in this situation. Like I think I have to just get on with it now, and get used to it. But any advice, or someone to talk to would be great. I sound like such a loser.

Sorry that it's so long, I ranted. Thanks, guys.



   
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JC! Offline
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Re: Why don't I have good friends? - August 2nd 2010, 02:45 PM

Aww I know how you feel, I'm in the same sort of situation only I dont even have a bf to hang out with.... Oh well what I'd advise is maybe taking up a new hobby which you can use to meet new people? I've recently taken up Wakeboarding and I've met a few people through it. It would probably be better if its a team sport as you'll meet more people that way and also team building is great for making friendships I dont know... maybe you're not a sporty girl... but maybe you'd like a dance class or something?

You seem like a really nice intelligent young lady so go on, get up and put yourself out there! Also, you mentioned a whole confidence issue (which again, I completely understand how you feel) but going out of your comfort zone and pushing the boundaries and doing something different from the norm is a great way to boost confidence and I think it really works and I'm trying to the same with myself!

Take care
JC!
   
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