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Friends and Family Everyone has disagreements, even best friends and family. If you need advice about a relationship, ask us here.

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  (#1 (permalink)) Old
Jessielove Offline
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It's good...isn't it? - February 17th 2009, 09:40 PM

About two days ago I left my best friend. We've been best friends for coming up on seven months. He used me, abused me, lied to me, broke promises, hurt me, broke me down, and broke my heart. I stayed around because I loved him to death. I had fallen in love with him. There was this whole dating thing going to go down between us...but he wanted to wait till I was 16. He waited a month. Used me for a month and told me I was pretty enough for him. Each time we talked about this, the reasons changed. I gave up. I ended up dating three guys since then. They all ended badly. I've started to fall for my newest best friend. He likes me too, but doesn't think we could make it in a relationship. Okay, he at least is telling me the truth. So the best friend I left, I'll call him A, doesn't like this new best friend, call him B. Anyways, for Valentine's day B asked me to be his date, so I accepted because I like him. We went to the mall after hanging at my place. A was working. They met and didn't seem to like each other too much. I still had fun. A then calls me later on in the night and tells me he got a girlfriend. Now, he knew I was in love with for a little. He knew I was always going to have feelings for him. He also knew he promised me if he EVER started to date someone else...he'd never tell me or talk about them because it'd hurt me too much. So, he ruined my Valentine's day. Then ruined the 15th for me too by talking about her. He told me she was 15, younger then me. He wouldn't date me because I was 15, but he'll date her. I turned 16, he turned 18 not long after. He's dating 15 when he's 18. It's weird to me because he's dating someone younger then the girl he claims as his "little sister."
So that was the last of it I could take from him. I was sick of being hurt by him so I left and normally he always comes after me asking me why and all, but he didn't and I think it's because of his new girlfriend. Being he was my best friend out of everyone else...I went to him for everything. We hugged a lot and we acted like we date, so I think he knew girlfriend got jealous over it already and didn't want him to be my best. He always said he'd never give up and stay around and come after me, but he didn't even care. He stopped being a friend to me a long time ago and he stopped really caring a long time ago.
Me finally leaving...was that a good idea? I mean, he's been depressing me for months and hurting me. Now I can finally get better and heal, right?


When you fall, don't always expect someone to pick you up. Do it yourself, you're stronger then you think. Brush yourself off and keep your head high.

"She loves me, she loves me not, despite the fact I smell like pot, I write this poem to you Jessie, are you my lady love to be?" -
sphynx

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  (#2 (permalink)) Old
almostinvisible Offline
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Re: It's good...isn't it? - February 17th 2009, 09:46 PM

Hey Jessie,
I think you did the right thing. He was definitely hurting you a lot, and with time you're going to feel a lot better.


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  (#3 (permalink)) Old
Strider Offline
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Re: It's good...isn't it? - February 17th 2009, 09:52 PM

Hi there Jessie,

I agree with Erica. If this guy has been causing you that much stress and pain, then I think it's good that you're away from him now. It's not fair that you were treated that way and you deserve a lot better.

It's hard to deal with at first, but you will heal and feel better about it over time. I think you made the right decision.

Stay strong

Nat.


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  (#4 (permalink)) Old
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Re: It's good...isn't it? - February 17th 2009, 10:11 PM

I definitely think you did the right think if you're friend was treating you like this. Surround yourself with people who treat you better so you can get over what happened.


   
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Re: It's good...isn't it? - February 17th 2009, 10:17 PM

I'm glad you left him. Sounds like he's been messing with your head quite a bit! You might feel sad about it for a bit, but trust me, time heals all wounds. I'm sure you deserve a much more honest and down-to-earth guy anyway! Good luck.
   
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MadPoet Offline
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Re: It's good...isn't it? - February 17th 2009, 10:18 PM

Hey there. You know, I'm dealing with kind of the same thing right now, so I can really understand. Questioning whether or not you made the right choice to end any kind of relationship that seemed to go wrong is completely understandable. But your friend stopped being a friend to you long before you chose to not stick around and try to be his friend. When you have a friendship it can't be one sided. Both people have to hold up one end, and it sounds like he let his end fall. It's hard to let go when you're holding a whole friendship in your hands, even if it feels as if it's a broken one. But by letting go and moving on you have made the right choice. Staying in a friendship that hurts you just to feel like you have a friend and are needed and cared about during given moments just isn't the kind of friendship you deserve, because you deserve much better than that. Although it may still be hard to let go you will realize in time that this has taken a big burden off of your shoulders, and that you made the right choice of setting your friendship aside.

Good luck and stay strong





A lonely soul in a land of broken hearts


   
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