Anti social.. ?

[lizzy7677]

Ok.. heres the story, I just moved from California to North Carolina about 6 weeks ago, and I had good friends in CA that I felt really comfortable and happy with, but my dad got a better job in NC so we had to move. Now that im in this new school across the country im finding i cant make any friends.. people have tried talking to me but i cant keep conversations going or start them and each day i go without talking to people i feel more lonely and down. The thing is, I REALLY want to talk to people but cant bring myself to do it.. i keep telling myself if i dont start talking people they'll just give up on me but i still cant do it. Does anyone else have this problem or know what i should do to help my shy/ quietness? :/

[Ghost On The Highway]

I have the same problem, and I think it often comes down to a lack of trust. It's not that I think people are "out to get me" or anything, just that I doubt their sincerity when they show me kindness, as though it's a common courtesy instead of the beginnings of a real friendship. I feel that if I let myself get too close to people who are simply being nice to me because they're outgoing, friendly people, I'll be hurt when they don't accept and return my feelings. Classic "hedgehog's dilemma," I know, but it's hard to get away from.

You're not antisocial. I've never met anyone who truly was. The fact that not talking to people makes you feel lonely and depressed and that having good friends makes you happy is proof of that. If you were antisocial, you wouldn't care enough to start this thread.

People may "give up on you," in a sense, but it's probably not because they don't want to talk to you. I find it very hard to talk to reserved people, even though I fit the category myself. Everyone's different, but for me it's mainly that I need the person I'm talking to to help me maintain an interesting conversation. Some people like to talk and not listen, but they're probably not the ones you want to be friends with anyway.

[luvflamingos]

Hi Elizabeth! I'm Mary in NC. I am extremely shy and my bestest friend ever moved away recently so it has been really hard on me. It sometimes takes a while to meet new friends especially moving to a completely new state, neighborhood, school, etc. I feel for you, but don't give up on yourself girl. Please don't give up on yourself. Give yourself a little more time.

[lizzy7677]

Ok, thanks for the help
I guess i'll just give it more time..

[rockstar29]

try to find a group of people with the same interests as u