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Friends and Family Everyone has disagreements, even best friends and family. If you need advice about a relationship, ask us here.

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  (#1 (permalink)) Old
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Unhappy I'm I a horrible friend? =[ - February 19th 2009, 01:26 AM

me and my bestfriend arent friends anymore, it started cuz she said i wasnt her BESTEST friend cuz we had NOTHING in common anymore and we barly talked, and then later i told her i jsut cant be friends with her cuz we dont have anything in common, all we do is fight. and she never cares about anything in my life, all she talks about is how much her life sucks and how she is depressed and suidcial, she used to be a cutter, but she's only stopped for like almost a month, and she is saying im the reason she is suicidal now, but she was always talking about suicide and depression and nothing else and i just couldnt take it anymore! =[ I wanted to be there for her, I tried!! I care about her so much, and would be so sad if anything happend to her, but its really hard being friends with someone like this.. i told my parents about her being suicidal and cutting and stuff a while ago, and just told her today that i told them cuz she already hates me and she yelled at me and said that she thought she could trust me and i said i was just trying to help and i said lots of ppl on TH said i should tell her parents and at least i didnt do that, I think I should have told her parents, becuz I really dont want her to get hurt. And then she wrote this poem, and it really scared me. it was about suicide and it was just really scary, im really worried about her. i wish i could be a better friend... if we were still friends... but i really cant take this anymore... ive tried really hard. plz help... sorry it was so long..
   
  (#2 (permalink)) Old
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Re: I'm I a horrible friend? =[ - February 19th 2009, 01:46 AM

well you told her that she ruined ur life that's enough to make someone suicidal


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  (#3 (permalink)) Old
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Re: I'm I a horrible friend? =[ - February 19th 2009, 01:51 AM

i didnt tell her she RUINED my life, i told her she was RUINING it. theres a difference, and maybe if she didnt only talk about how bad everything was and tried to be happy this wouldnt have happend.
   
  (#4 (permalink)) Old
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Re: I'm I a horrible friend? =[ - February 19th 2009, 01:52 AM

yeah well maybe she can't help that she's always depressed and suicidal and MAYBE she was trying but MAYBE that day somthing REALLY bad happened and was EXTRA depressed


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  (#5 (permalink)) Old
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Unhappy Re: I'm I a horrible friend? =[ - February 19th 2009, 01:58 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Perfectly*Imperfect View Post
yeah well maybe she can't help that she's always depressed and suicidal and MAYBE she was trying but MAYBE that day somthing REALLY bad happened and was EXTRA depressed
well im still really worried about her, and i just couldnt take all her sadness! i tried really hard, and im sooo worried! and she doesnt think i care at all, she doesnt think im sorry. she doesnt know how much i care and how sorry i am..
   
  (#6 (permalink)) Old
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Re: I'm I a horrible friend? =[ - February 19th 2009, 01:59 AM

well you kno it's hard to believe that u still care when you walk away so quick


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  (#7 (permalink)) Old
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Re: I'm I a horrible friend? =[ - February 19th 2009, 02:00 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Perfectly*Imperfect View Post
well you kno it's hard to believe that u still care when you walk away so quick

she doesnt need me, she even said she didnt. after all im the reason she is suicidal apperently. and she has her BESTEST friend to be there for her, why would she need someone that she thinks is a bitch?
   
  (#8 (permalink)) Old
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Re: I'm I a horrible friend? =[ - February 19th 2009, 02:03 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Far From Perfect View Post
i didnt tell her she RUINED my life, i told her she was RUINING it. theres a difference, and maybe if she didnt only talk about how bad everything was and tried to be happy this wouldnt have happend.
Alright, I'm sorry, this is going to sound bitchy.
But that was a very selfish thing to say.
I don't think you were fair to your friend at all, and tbh I think she's the one that needs support right now. Not everyone can plaster on a smile and fake happy all the time. If you can, that's great. But some people aren't that fortunate. What you did to your friend wasn't exactly what I would call friendly, and if I had to be honest I would say that you kind of owe your friend an apology. Sure, maybe she said some hurtful things to, but you have no right to say that she needs to stop bitching about her life. You both played some parts in this whole fight you are in right now, but blaming all of this on your friend isn't the right way to go. If you're so fed up with your friend, then don't stay in this friendship, because she needs someone who will support her and not accuse her of whining about her problems.

I'm sorry if that sounded rude, but I've been on your friend's side of this before and I think you need to think about how much this could have hurt her, especially since she's going through a hard time right now.





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  (#9 (permalink)) Old
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Re: I'm I a horrible friend? =[ - February 19th 2009, 02:04 AM

well maybe ur being a bitch and you called her a bitch too and um didn't she tell you everything? so now she has to keep it all botteled up and she's gona explde


Failure is not falling; it is remainin where you have fallen.
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  (#10 (permalink)) Old
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February 19th 2009, 02:07 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Concrete Girl View Post
Alright, I'm sorry, this is going to sound bitchy.
But that was a very selfish thing to say.
I don't think you were fair to your friend at all, and tbh I think she's the one that needs support right now. Not everyone can plaster on a smile and fake happy all the time. If you can, that's great. But some people aren't that fortunate. What you did to your friend wasn't exactly what I would call friendly, and if I had to be honest I would say that you kind of owe your friend an apology. Sure, maybe she said some hurtful things to, but you have no right to say that she needs to stop bitching about her life. You both played some parts in this whole fight you are in right now, but blaming all of this on your friend isn't the right way to go. If you're so fed up with your friend, then don't stay in this friendship, because she needs someone who will support her and not accuse her of whining about her problems.

I'm sorry if that sounded rude, but I've been on your friend's side of this before and I think you need to think about how much this could have hurt her, especially since she's going through a hard time right now.

im not blaming the whole thing on her at all, she is blaming it all on me. and i tried being there for her, she would just yell at me. and im not telling her to stop bitching about her life completly, but its all she fucking talks about. i dont know about you, but i dont want all me and my bestfriend to talk about is how she is planning to kill herself next. i was always like "omg, im sorry =[" and i tried to help, i didnt know how to help or what to say, but i tried my best. and she yelled at me for it, she said i didnt help and at all and made it worse. and i dont think just cuz she is suicidal gives her a right to be a bitch to me and i cant be a bitch back just cuz she has some issues.

Quote:
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well maybe ur being a bitch and you called her a bitch too and um didn't she tell you everything? so now she has to keep it all botteled up and she's gona explde

even if we did become friends again, she said she can never trust me again. and we grew apart just like SHE said. why try to keep together a friendship thats already broken?

Last edited by Strider; February 19th 2009 at 02:44 AM. Reason: double post
   
  (#11 (permalink)) Old
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February 19th 2009, 02:08 AM

umm ur friend NEVER said you made it worse so idk what ur tlking about

Quote:
Originally Posted by Far From Perfect View Post
even if we did become friends again, she said she can never trust me again. and we grew apart just like SHE said. why try to keep together a friendship thats already broken?
um yeah you broke a promise i wouldnt trust you either


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You laugh because i'm d.i.f.f.e.r.e.n.t, I laugh because you're all the s.a.m.e.



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Last edited by Strider; February 19th 2009 at 02:44 AM. Reason: double post
   
  (#12 (permalink)) Old
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February 19th 2009, 02:13 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Perfectly*Imperfect View Post
umm ur friend NEVER said you made it worse so idk what ur tlking about
um yeah she did, she said she has never been this suicidal ever and its ALL my fault.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Perfectly*Imperfect View Post
um yeah you broke a promise i wouldnt trust you either
i had to tell someone!! i wanted to help her!! im sorry for caring.

Last edited by Strider; February 19th 2009 at 02:45 AM. Reason: double post
   
  (#13 (permalink)) Old
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Re: I'm I a horrible friend? =[ - February 19th 2009, 02:15 AM

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um yeah she did, she said she has never been this suicidal ever and its ALL my fault.
yeah she said that u did make her more suicidal not because u said omg i'm sry a shit like that


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  (#14 (permalink)) Old
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Re: I'm I a horrible friend? =[ - February 19th 2009, 02:16 AM

I think we should stop preying on the poster of this thread, personally.
First of all, I don't think we have any place in the fight you're in, seeing as it's between you and a friend, and we shouldn't be taking sides. I think I'll stop posting in this thread..

Best of luck with you and your friend, and I hope things get worked out. xx





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Re: I'm I a horrible friend? =[ - February 19th 2009, 02:16 AM

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Originally Posted by Perfectly*Imperfect View Post
yeah she said that u did make her more suicidal not because u said omg i'm sry a shit like that
i didnt say thats why!!! i was saying that and then the other thing. but yeah, she doesnt need me cuz im a bad friend and i and making her more suicidal remember?
   
  (#16 (permalink)) Old
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Re: I'm I a horrible friend? =[ - February 19th 2009, 02:16 AM

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Originally Posted by Far From Perfect View Post
i had to tell someone!! i wanted to help her!! im sorry for caring.
if you really wanted to show her that you cared you wouldn't have walked out when she needed you the most


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  (#17 (permalink)) Old
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Re: I'm I a horrible friend? =[ - February 19th 2009, 02:18 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Perfectly*Imperfect View Post
if you really wanted to show her that you cared you wouldn't have walked out when she needed you the most
she said she didnt need me.
   
  (#18 (permalink)) Old
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Re: I'm I a horrible friend? =[ - February 19th 2009, 02:19 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Far From Perfect View Post
she said she didnt need me.
yeah well maybe she did but now that ur treating her like shit she's trying to convince herself of that


Failure is not falling; it is remainin where you have fallen.
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You laugh because i'm d.i.f.f.e.r.e.n.t, I laugh because you're all the s.a.m.e.



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  (#19 (permalink)) Old
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Re: I'm I a horrible friend? =[ - February 19th 2009, 02:20 AM

Hi there both of you,

I'm going to need to ask you two to watch both the double posting and the argument. This is not a situation that can be solved by arguing and it is fair that Far From Perfect is asking for advice here.

Now to get to your post.
I think that it's difficult for a person to be feeling depressed and suicidal, but it does also take its toll on the people around them. I understand that you care a lot about this person, but felt you couldn't do more to help, am I understanding that correctly? In that case, I think you need to suggest to her to get some professional help and if you feel it is necessary, then talk to her parents about it.

As her friend, you are concerned about her. Even if you are not talking right now, that doesn't mean she doesn't need someone to stick up for her. Talk to her parents and get her some help. That would be the best way to support her right now.

Now please keep this thread calm and watch the posts.

Nat.


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February 19th 2009, 02:20 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Perfectly*Imperfect View Post
yeah well maybe she did but now that ur treating her like shit she's trying to convince herself of that
shes treating me like shit to.

[quote=Strider;55369] I think you need to suggest to her to get some professional help and if you feel it is necessary, then talk to her parents about it. [quote]


see perfectly imperfect!!! i SHOULD tell her parents..

Last edited by Strider; February 19th 2009 at 02:45 AM. Reason: double post
   
  (#21 (permalink)) Old
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Re: I'm I a horrible friend? =[ - February 19th 2009, 02:23 AM

we wouldn't have to be arguing in here if she wouldn't have blocked her friend on msn


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You laugh because i'm d.i.f.f.e.r.e.n.t, I laugh because you're all the s.a.m.e.



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  (#22 (permalink)) Old
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Re: I'm I a horrible friend? =[ - February 19th 2009, 02:23 AM

Woah! Okay lets not start arguements here.

To the girl who started this post (I'm sorry I don't know your name).
I think you should organise a girly night in with your friend , watch some films , order in some pizza relax and have fun , it sounds like you've both done/said things you should'nt have , you both need to have a calm relaxed chat where you can tell eachother how you've been feeling lately and apologise for the wrongs you've done and put these things aside.


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  (#23 (permalink)) Old
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Re: I'm I a horrible friend? =[ - February 19th 2009, 02:28 AM

i'm done aruging i'm going to bed bye.


Failure is not falling; it is remainin where you have fallen.
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You laugh because i'm d.i.f.f.e.r.e.n.t, I laugh because you're all the s.a.m.e.



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