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Friends and Family Everyone has disagreements, even best friends and family. If you need advice about a relationship, ask us here.

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BUNNIEZ^_^ Offline
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Friend and Boyfriend Troubles - October 1st 2010, 02:05 PM

Hi, my name's Jodie. I'm going to be fifteen in a few weeks time.
Okay, so I've been best friends with my friend Deanna since we were in grade 3, and we're in grade 10 now, which is a really long time. I love her so much, we know each other so well and do heaps of stuff together. I've always gone to her when I needed advice or whatever, and same goes for her. The thing is, I started dating my boyfriend Ayrton last year. Our year anniversary will be this October 23rd. I also love him so, so much. The thing is, I've been finding it really hard lately to balance my relationships with them both. It's not that they don't like each other or anything; they're in a band together and get along just fine. It's just that I can't share my attention with them if we're all together at once. So, for a while now I've been managing to see them both frequently, but seperately and it works great. Recently though, Deanna has been spending alot of time with our other friend Rachel, who both Deanna and I used to not like very much because she was bitchy etc. But now, Deanna is getting friendly with her and it seems like she's resenting me a little and I feel like we're losing our friendship. I know I must sound like a jealous friend or something, and I'd honestly be fine with her spending time with anyone else, after all, I can't expect her to sit around and do nothing while I'm with my boyfriend. I just don't know how to tell her it's not a good idea to hang out with Rachel without sounding jealous or whatever and to ask her why she's being a bit negative to me. Help please?
   
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Re: Friend and Boyfriend Troubles - October 6th 2010, 08:15 AM

Maybe try to make her feel she as important to you as ever. Maybe give her complements here or there and make her feel she's needed.

Is Rachel still the same as before? If she's not, I don't see a problem with your friend hanging out with her. If she if the same, maybe your friend will get tired of her.

Sorry for not giving better advice.
   
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Re: Friend and Boyfriend Troubles - October 6th 2010, 02:17 PM

The best thing to do is just talk to her, let her know how you're feeling. It can't hurt and could make your friendship stronger. Just let her know that it's difficult for you to have to share yourself with both of them at the same time, and it feels like the one is jealous of the other when you're with them. I'm sure she will understand this and try to solve the problem. Let her know that you're scared you'll lose her to this other friend, and you don't like that.

Communication is the key. Take care.



   
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