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Friends and Family Everyone has disagreements, even best friends and family. If you need advice about a relationship, ask us here.

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Truth can kill. - October 26th 2010, 09:24 PM

This thread has been labeled as non-PG13 by the original poster or by a Moderator. The contents of this thread might therefore not be suitable for younger users. Please take this into consideration before continuing to read.

I've liked this girl for several years, and this September, I started being around her more and being more social with her. I even told her about my depression.

I would do anything for her, really. I let her use my phone almost daily to text some guy (I used to think he was her boyfriend) and to listen to music. I get her almost everything she wants.

But today, I actually read some of her texts to this guy. She's screwing him behind her boyfriend's back, and this guy already has a girlfriend. I lost a ton of respect for her, and I thought I lost my feelings for her, but I haven't. I didn't say anything about it directly, but I'm just downright pissed at this asshole. I want to make him regret cheating. I have access to her facebook, and I want to go in and find that guy's girlfriend and tell her. If I knew who her boyfriend was, I'd tell him too.

I want to do this, but I don't want her to get hurt. Despite what she's doing, I still love her. I'm a sap.

So the main question is; Should I tell his girlfriend the truth?


Favorite Quote: "Never to suffer would never to have been blessed" -Edgar Allan Poe
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Re: Truth can kill. - October 29th 2010, 01:19 AM

Not yet. Talk to this girl you like about it and try and convince her that she is in the wrong. Let the option of telling the girlfriend be the last (because its not your part yet and it will give the other guy a chance to be faithful and turn around).

Talk to her, but don't confide in her emotionally anymore. Don't get personal with her unless you are sure or there is a hint that she feels the same way.


I came here to help out, so if you wanna talk or just need someone to bounce ideas or issues off of or something else then send me a message and I will reply as soon as I can.
   
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Re: Truth can kill. - October 31st 2010, 10:52 PM

No matter how vile her actions may be, that doesn't give you the right to violate her privacy by logging onto her Facebook account. =/ For now, I would settle with telling her how you feel. You can't change her mind, but at least you can express your disappointment

If you feel telling her boyfriend and the other boy's girlfriend is the right thing to do, then do it... but obtain the names by other means (NOT by logging onto her Facebook to figure it out). Also be aware of the possible consequences. Chances are, your friend IS going to get hurt, because she'll have to deal with an angry boyfriend, an angry lover, and an angry lover's girlfriend. Chances are, your friend won't appreciate your meddling in her affairs, and she may wish to cease all contact with you following this entire ordeal.






Last edited by PSY; October 31st 2010 at 11:04 PM.
   
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Re: Truth can kill. - October 31st 2010, 11:01 PM

Tell her you know. Don't threaten her or use the information as blackmail; just tell her she should tell him the truth. If she doesn't, that's bad on her. Just don't get yourself involved if you are still on her side. If you're not on her side...then anything is fair game. I would want to know if I was the boyfriend but it might result in unpredicted problems for you.

...You should know by now she might not be best for you. The saying goes "Once a cheater, always a cheater." But yeah, hearts have been known to overlook things like logic.
   
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