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Friends and Family Everyone has disagreements, even best friends and family. If you need advice about a relationship, ask us here.

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shanadian Offline
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Unhappy Awkward situation - November 7th 2010, 02:17 AM

I don't even know how to begin. This will be a confused-sounding post.

So I have a guy friend I'm really close with, but not romantically. He is a great singer, and does covers of popular songs (mostly Lady Gaga). He just got the rights to put an album of his covers on iTunes. It should be up by tomorrow night.
Except the album cover, the picture, bothers me a lot.

The album cover isn't anything bad. He's just not wearing a shirt. It's not even his whole torso. I would link to the image because it's not inappropriate but I don't know if I should. It's just, like, the top half of the top half of him. There's nothing wrong with the picture, but I feel like there's some sexual energy there. He's a lot like a brother to me, so seeing a brother sort of sexualized is very awkward for me. That, and I feel like he's not old enough to be taking pictures like that and putting them out there (I admit, I'm over a year younger than he is). I feel like he's growing up too fast.

And I want to explain all of this to him, but in fewer words, in a less confused tone, and without insulting him.

I almost want to cry because this is driving me insane. He's attractive, so I like the picture, but he's like my brother, so I don't want to see him like that.
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Re: Awkward situation - November 7th 2010, 04:14 AM

Oh...I understand.
Yes, I would definitely feel awkward in your position.
This is probably a rant, but maybe you could talk to him about why you feel uncomfortable with the cover.
Tell me how things work out
   
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Re: Awkward situation - November 10th 2010, 01:46 AM

Remember, emotions can be tricky especially at such an age. Since he isn't your brother really, then there is a chance that you might get some affections for him, accept that this is just normal because he isn't your brother. Accept what happened and move on from it and it should become easier(but it may take time perhaps). And when you see the picture control yourself, if you find it too difficult then don't look at the picture at all.


I came here to help out, so if you wanna talk or just need someone to bounce ideas or issues off of or something else then send me a message and I will reply as soon as I can.
   
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Re: Awkward situation - November 11th 2010, 03:35 AM

It's hard to accept others who are growing up especially when you're a teenager. I feel that this is akin to a girl finding out that their friends are having sex. I'm not sure. However, this is something that you have to accept. When you grow up, you'll be less phased by what other people do. These are his decisions. Talking to him about this is also not a bad idea. Tell him exactly what you said here.

I hope that helped,
D C
   
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Re: Awkward situation - November 11th 2010, 01:01 PM

Thank you, dystorsion, that was what I needed to hear.
I did talk to him a few days ago and he understood. He said his (real) sister hated it, too, so that makes me feel less alone.
And I know I'll get used to it eventually.
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Re: Awkward situation - November 12th 2010, 03:40 AM

No problem shanadian.

Don't worry, this is a normal response. For example, people get concerned when their friends are doing things we're not used to (like drugs or smoking). You're just being a good and concerned friend. However, some of these things are just out of our control.

Best,
D C
   
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