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Friends and Family Everyone has disagreements, even best friends and family. If you need advice about a relationship, ask us here.

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I honestly hate my brother ... - November 24th 2010, 06:31 PM

This thread has been labeled as non-PG13 by the original poster or by a Moderator. The contents of this thread might therefore not be suitable for younger users. Please take this into consideration before continuing to read.

I don't have to love anyone because they're blood related, please don't tell me I really do love my brother 'deep down'. I've long since given up attempting to repair a relationship that he kept bulldozing back down.

Me: 16 (17 soon)
Brother: 15 (likely has aspergers)
Sister: 14

Friend: 15

I made a thread earlier about my brother masturbating 3 feet away from me, across from the computer I was sitting at. Less than a week later, he did it again .. except this time it was a room away. I screamed at him to go upstairs, he got up then came back less than a minute later to do the same thing. He finally went away on the agreement I wouldn't call dad, as that's what I threatened to do.

He was on our 360, touching the controllers. It's bad enough that he never washes his hands (it takes only an hour of game-time for him to leave long dirt streaks on the computer and mouse). My dreamcast controller has only had noticeable dirt on it after we had it for a few years. He really is filthy.

This is honestly the most disturbing thing I've had to deal with in a long, long time. I can't handle this. No one else in this house has ever done things like that.

Hell, it gets worse. We have a family friend who has come over sometimes. He was upstairs with my brother, and my brother started masturbating. He tried to leave my brother's room. My brother LOCKED HIS DOOR, and wouldn't let him leave.

He was on my dad's laptop at the time, and the friend told me that he .. ugh. Came on the screen of my dad's work laptop.

Recently he took my laptop out of my bedroom and hid it in his room. I couldn't find it at first, but he left it out the next day. Guess what? He had downloaded pictures of girls he had on his facebook and they were up, along with some generic naked girls. Which is so disturbing. This is my laptop, and the thought that he might have done what he did to my dad's makes me want to vomit. I scrubbed it clean, of course ..

I told my mom about him masturbating downstairs in plain view twice, she laughed about it the first time and shrugged it off the second. I didn't tell her about the friend incident, but I doubt anything would happen if I did. She doesn't ever punish him, and the fact that he's still allowed on the computer and 360 says something about her .. well .. really shitty parenting. I haven't told my dad about this stuff. If I did he would likely try to punish him, but my mom always overrules him.

My mom never lets my dad be a parent. She's either way too lax or way too strict, if my dad was actually allowed to voice his opinion on parenting AND have it listened to, then this house would be a lot more balanced/fair.

He also thinks throwing empty containers and footballs at my head is funny, and often completely breaches my personal space by touching me and ect. ALSO, he tells people at his school that my little sister is a whore. She's not. He also screamed a death-threat at her, and he sounded completely serious. No joking, it was serious.

And just so much more .. I really don't know, I don't know what to do. I can't stand living in this house anymore. I really want to a. move out, or b. have him gone. I need advice to handle this until I'm moved out or he's in jail, because I can't stay in my room forever.


   
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Re: I honestly hate my brother ... - November 25th 2010, 07:45 AM

Okay , your mum needs to treat him and you fairly , I KNOW he may have aspergers but , in my opinion , WHERE IS HIS MEDS? he would act so much better on medication , what he is doing is gross and unfair! I actaully nearly vomited when you said "he came on the screen"
Do you have fanmily to live with or what about this family friend? If they know what he's like , they might help you.
Ask them , then get you dad's permission if your mum is likely to laugh or take his side.




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Re: I honestly hate my brother ... - November 25th 2010, 03:07 PM

Yeah .. he doesn't have any medication yet. I doubt my mom is going to get him any, because she thinks it only 'masks the problem'. It's the same reason she won't get me anti-depressants ..

I love my mom, but she can be really unreasonable. It took me forever to get allergy medicine she said it masked the problem. Yeah mom, that's the point!

Back on topic ..

It really is disgusting to think about the things he does with our electronics, and I'm really sick of not being able to touch my own controllers or even my own laptop without feeling sick.


   
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Re: I honestly hate my brother ... - November 26th 2010, 03:22 PM

I think you should tell your dad about everything that is bothering you (including his masturbation habits making you uncomfortable, him calling your sister a whore, death threats). Tell him that you've told your mom about all this and she has done nothing and you are left feeling very uncomfortable in your own house. In the end, parenting is between your mom and dad and there's no much you can do other than appeal to your dad to enforce the rules or take matters into your own hands (which you aren't really in a position to do).



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Re: I honestly hate my brother ... - November 30th 2010, 10:44 AM

Oh yeah , you gotta tell your dad , alothough your mum thinks your bro is god's gift , your dad might be able to sway her thoughs if she hears all this from him.




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