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Friends and Family Everyone has disagreements, even best friends and family. If you need advice about a relationship, ask us here.

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  (#1 (permalink)) Old
Jessielove Offline
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Name: Jessie
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He doesn't want to be honest. - February 23rd 2009, 10:05 AM

I have a best friend...who I've kissed. We kissed on V-day. Okay...we made out. We're pretty close and both like each other, or so he says he likes me. He did this survey today saying that he hasn't kissed anyone this month...which he did and that he never hears anyone tell him they love him, which I do all the time. Now I told my other best friend about this and he said the guy's being an asshole. Either he doesn't want to admit to things happen, he's ashamed of me and doesn't want people even knowing we're pretty close, or he's just a total ass.

My other best friend told me to ask him about it. Do I? I don't want to fall for this guy and get hurt yet again when I finally started to trust people. Do I just ignore it and move on? Do I ignore it and leave this friendship?
If I do ask him about it...how do I do it? Just go, "So...I read the survey...what's up with that? We've kissed. I tell you I love you." I'm confused about it...I don't know what to do.


When you fall, don't always expect someone to pick you up. Do it yourself, you're stronger then you think. Brush yourself off and keep your head high.

"She loves me, she loves me not, despite the fact I smell like pot, I write this poem to you Jessie, are you my lady love to be?" -
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  (#2 (permalink)) Old
asyoulikeit Offline
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Re: He doesn't want to be honest. - February 23rd 2009, 06:21 PM

Jessie, it sounds like you're already in deep enough as far as liking/wanting him, so you have to do SOMETHING. Whether you actively talk to him or just decide that you won't give him the extra affection (since he won't acknowledge it) you need to solve this on your end. Talking to him won't hurt, unless you decide that your friendship with him is worth more than the risk of confronting him. Would you be ok if he really was being a jerk and didn't want the same thing? I think finding out will make you feel better, even if it hurts at first. This way you can continue to get better at trusting people, and I know how hard that is.

Take care and good luck <3


When you say "never", I'll say "lie"
When you say "always", I'll say "true"
When you say "love", I'll say "you"
I'll say "you"

It gets better.
   
  (#3 (permalink)) Old
Strider Offline
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Re: He doesn't want to be honest. - February 23rd 2009, 10:40 PM

Hi Jessie,

Your friend might not be ready to be a part of a relationship right now. That could be a reason as to why he doesn't want to make anything public. Also, could he be worried that other people will tease him? Maybe he doesn't want other classmates badgering him about it. He just might want to keep it private right now.

I think you should definitely talk to him about it, though. Find out what his feelings are and if he is interested in a relationship. Make sure you get a clear answer from him.

Nat.


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Everyone has a story. What's yours?
   
  (#4 (permalink)) Old
Jessielove Offline
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Re: He doesn't want to be honest. - February 24th 2009, 01:00 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Strider View Post
Hi Jessie,

Your friend might not be ready to be a part of a relationship right now. That could be a reason as to why he doesn't want to make anything public. Also, could he be worried that other people will tease him? Maybe he doesn't want other classmates badgering him about it. He just might want to keep it private right now.

I think you should definitely talk to him about it, though. Find out what his feelings are and if he is interested in a relationship. Make sure you get a clear answer from him.

Nat.
He's the one who started saying, "I love you" first. I said it after him. The kissing, that was my fault, but he keeps doing it back. We don't even live in the same town. I'm homeschooled he goes to a highschool where the only reason people know about me is because he shows pictures of me to his friends.

I'm worried that maybe he likes someone else now or too and I don't want to be played yet again by another best friend.


When you fall, don't always expect someone to pick you up. Do it yourself, you're stronger then you think. Brush yourself off and keep your head high.

"She loves me, she loves me not, despite the fact I smell like pot, I write this poem to you Jessie, are you my lady love to be?" -
sphynx

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  (#5 (permalink)) Old
Strider Offline
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Re: He doesn't want to be honest. - February 24th 2009, 09:40 PM

Then I really suggest you talk to him about this, Jessie. I'm sure it would help get a better sense of what he thinks about the relationship and if there is another girl.

From what you were saying, it sounds like he is interested in a relationship, but I think talking to him would clear up the problem. This can be difficult when you aren't in the same town, but try and find time to see him and get this sorted out.


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The great artists of our time are the ones who created something timeless. But it was never them defining it that way.
Everyone has a story. What's yours?
   
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