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Friends and Family Everyone has disagreements, even best friends and family. If you need advice about a relationship, ask us here.

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What the hell? - December 8th 2010, 08:58 AM

This thread has been labeled as triggering, particularly on the subject of self harm, by the original poster or by a Moderator. The contents of this thread might therefore not be suitable for certain sensitive users. Please take this into consideration before continuing to read.

I mean WTF!

I cut so she blubs and makes me promise her not to! And then she goes and does the same thing 2 weeks later.
Why?
She has everything , she ssays 'Jump' her parents say 'how high'. She's a spoilt brat and knows it.
She's wearing a huge , visable bandage too , making sure she shows everyone. I find it disturbing how she flaunts it.
Her words to me 2 weeks ago when she saw were 'Just come and talk to me , rather than hurting yourself'
I'm sorry but she's looking more nd more like a hypocrite.

I slightly doubtful side of me is saying , Did she even cut?
I'll point out how I've only seen the badage and I actually saw her putting it on once , I saw nothing there.
Just plain skin.
No abrasions , nothing.

Which is just plain sick! Pretending to be a cutter is CRAzy , I have no sympathy for her , I just loathe her right now. Why pretend when you already have all the attention?
All the close friend and family
All the possesions
She has everything , nopt just material items either!

Right now I don't owe her anything , she made me promise her , well she can GO TO HELL. If it is 'ok' for her , then it is for me.
SDhe doesn't realise by faking she's triggerring me , because I just see 'Whats fair is fair'.

This is part SH thread part Friend thread, sorry




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Re: What the hell? - December 8th 2010, 02:44 PM


Yea, it sounds like she's doing it for attention. It you look at it on the surface it's pathetic, but try to see it more deeply.

She gets everything for free, you listed some stuff yourself. Well, there's always gonna be something missing when you're spoilt like that. It took me ages to figure it out myself, but I think it's just self-respect. So she probably lacks self-respect, and tries to make up for it (or supplement it) by getting herself more attention by doing that stuff with the bandages. Perhaps that's also the reason why she approached you about your SH, because she felt somehow compelled to do something. Why the lack of self-respect? 'Cos the way it sounds, she's not achieved anything herself, and deep down she knows it.

Try to talk to her about it. Think it through yourself though, 'cos you know more about her than I do, like has she got a job? I'll be frank, I'd be surprised if she does from what you've described. If you're gona talk, go easy, because some people get outright pissed when you confront them this way.


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Then politics doesn't care about you either. Truth. You've got to make your voice heard, if you want to be listened to. But that's too logical for some people, so let me go a step further. Not making your voice heard, leaves other people free to hijack it by speaking on your behalf, even if they don't actually give a shit about you. That's politics. So, make your voice heard. That's not a quote from anywhere. That's just me.


   
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Re: What the hell? - December 8th 2010, 09:12 PM

Instead of getting angry with her and telling her to go to hell, just pull her aside one day, tell her it's wrong for her to do this for attention and tell you not to when she's trying to pretend to do the same thing to herself. It doesn't sound like she has any problems of any sort. Tell her if she's going to keep up a hypocritical behavior towards you, you won't have any time for her in your life anymore.
   
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Re: What the hell? - December 9th 2010, 10:36 AM

I tried being there for her , I wont say her exact proplem right now as it isn't something I can announce , just private y'know (sorry)

Anyway she told me , and it was acctually something I had had to see to / gone through and I told her to come to me if she needed advice as I know how she feels right now and what she is going through
And I got told "You know nothing about it"
Sorry but I also know she's fakling self-harm , but I didn't confront her (yet)
Yes , thjis is a HUGE problem she has , but it doesn't give her the right to pretend to SH




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Re: What the hell? - December 23rd 2010, 10:26 PM

That's pretty messed up.. Granted, if she does have a problem, pretending to struggle with SH for attention could be her way of distracting herself from the problem. And if her sole purpose is to have attention, just to have attention; well then, that's sad. Some people treat attention like their drug; they need it, and without it they find themselves worthless. (which, like I said, is sad.)
Regardless of her intentions/reasons; pretending to SH isn't okay; it's a serious problem for a lot of people and I don't think she realizes the extent of it. And I know you must be feeling really hurt right now, considering it really is a problem for you.
You should probably confront her about it; but not in a accusing way. Just tell her how serious SH is, and that if it's not an addiction for her, she should be counting her blessings instead of pretending to harbor that demon. If you're absolutely 100% positive she's faking, then maybe it's best for you to stay away for a while; because her treating it so lightly won't help you overcome it yourself, ya know?


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